Hipster Elitist Ruins British Boat Race Because He Hates Elitists

Written by Ashley Burns / 04.09.12

Ever since that whole “Occupy” thing started way back when, I was always curious as to why there weren’t more protesters at sporting events, railing against those millionaire athletes and billionaire owners for having all that success and money and not giving it away for free. But aside from a few threats of protesting the Super Bowl (too cold in Indy) and World Series (St. Louis fans will kill someone for ruining their baseball), the Occupy folks have been relatively quiet about sports. I figure it’s because they spent so much time ignoring sports as kids, so why should they pay attention now?

Australian world-saver and Occupy “member” Trenton Oldfield is ready to buck that trend, and he began his crusade against elitism in sports this weekend by disrupting the 183rd run of the Oxford-Cambridge Boat Race.

An intruder protesting against elitism and privilege brought both boats to a standstill just over halfway through the 4 1/4-mile race when he swam into the middle of the River Thames and narrowly avoided being struck by the oars of both crews. (Via NBC Sports)

Take that, old wealth!

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Dolphins Fans Are Doing The Occupy Thing

Written by Ashley Burns / 03.20.12

Yesterday we touched on the fury of a growing number of Miami Dolphins fans with the team’s GM Jeff Ireland, and how the first step in this united fan coup was roughing up the guy’s Wikipedia page. Part two begins a little later today, as a South Florida radio station claims fans are going to show up to team facilities and protest the franchise’s seemingly inept free agency, as punctuated by the signing of QB David Garrard late yesterday.

Fans across message boards and comment sections have even gone as far as to boringly dub this effort “Occupy the Dolphins.” Man, I guess you could say there’s really some ire in the land right now.

*flushes toilet*

Not so fast, though, says Miami Herald beat writer Armando Salguero. Sure, Ireland hasn’t done anything great during his GM tenure, but has he done anything really that bad to deserve something as cruel as Wikipedia editing?

Someon (sic) hacked into Ireland’s Wikipedia page Tuesday and edited in some unkind things about him being born in a Denny’s parking lot etc… Maybe that sounds funny to you. Maybe you’re cheering the imagination of that move. I guess I’m not talking to you.

I am talking to the folks who are thinking for themselves. Break down the moves on their own merit. Tell me what you would have done. Tell me where you would depart from the current course.

Be fair.

Yeah, don’t say the dude was born in a Denny’s parking lot. That’s not cool. That’s like asking a potential draftee if his mom is a prostitute. Sports fans are always supposed to be calm, mature and rational at all times, but apparently Salguero’s plea for tranquility came a few hours too late, as someone also made some changes to Dolphins owner Stephen Ross’ Wikipedia last night.

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