Have you ever been to a baseball game and seen your favorite player warming up a few feet in front of you, but when you call out his name or try to ask him for an autograph he waves at you and moves or just ignores you completely? It’s not because he’s a dick, it’s because in today’s sports media world literally any interaction between an athlete and another human being will be reported, analyzed, misinterpreted and manipulated to suit the needs of a writer.

Such is the case of Josefine Öqvist, a Swedish soccer player who traded her jersey for a fan’s t-shirt following Sweden’s 1-0 victory over North Korea in group play of the Women’s World Cup on Saturday. I haven’t read anything explaining why she did it; she was probably just being cool and affable, because hey, she’d just won a World Cup game. 35 years ago they would’ve turned it into a Coke commercial. But today isn’t 35 years ago, it’s 35 minutes ago, so German News reported the incident and put a gigantic black bar across her torso to “censor” it.

So either the German news wanted us to think she’d been playing a World Cup soccer game without a bra and decided to flash everyone in the crowd, or the image of a woman in a sports bra was so potentially damaging to German children that it had to be halted. The best part of the video (besides NEIN! across her chest) is the higest rated YouTube comment, which reads like it was written by Kyle Farnsworth:

What the f**k in the world is that f**ken black box doing there she was f**ken dressed
jnmexico1997 19 hours ago

The uncensored version is now available, which you can watch after the cut.

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Oh Bekki, you left your socks on just for me!

Old Boys University is not actually a college, despite what I would think when trying not to care about it, but it is in fact a rugby union club in the Wellington Rugby Football Union in New Zealand. That’s where Lord of the Rings was filmed. *gives self wedgie* But I’m not here to pretend to know anything about rugby, because this little story involves boobies, and that’s something the entire world understands.

The Old Boys women’s rugby team is having trouble drawing fans each season, so gals like Bekki Abernathy up there grabbed a camera, ditched their clothes and they made themselves a little calendar. Hoping to escape the classic assumption that women who play rugby are butch goblins with ham fists and bulbous bearded clams, the ladies are not only using this nudie calendar to attract male fans, but also to show more women that hot chicks can also get drunk and beat the crap out of each other.

From the Old Boys Women’s website:

Our classy and artistic 2011 naked calendar rails against this myth by contrasting the concept of the seductive and submissive pin-up girl with images of women who assert themselves as strong athletes and empowered women.

Our calendar only presents images of women who play for our team and we see it as a great way to break down the stereotypes of Women’s Rugby and encourage potential Womens players to see that you dont have to be a certain size, temperament or demeanor to play.

And I think that’s both an outstanding attitude and BLAH BLAH BLAH BOOBIES!!! But don’t go getting any ideas, WNBA. I’m not sure that the 2011 “Luscious Layups” calendar will go flying off the shelves.

Only 1,000 Old Boys calendars are available, and they’re a hot item… or maybe not. Stick around after the jump for ordering details…

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Two California high school girls were arrested at their school’s football game last Friday after they despicably, horrifically and deplorably took part in the heinous act of streaking. The two girls made their way down to the sideline and nonchalantly walked to the field before they took off running and shed their clothes. I can only imagine that the few hundred or thousand teenage boys and fathers in attendance looked away in disgusted disbelief and immediately dialed 911.

The girls made it through the stunned bands at halftime as the teenagers undoubtedly vomited and sprinted for the nearest church, before they were finally tackled by officers and arrested. The officers reportedly tried out a new search and seizure method as well, as they laid on top of the girls and whispered, “Yeah, give daddy what he wants you naughty girl.” Thankfully, these terrible female students are being dealt with properly, as they are now facing expulsion since their antics took place at a school-sponsored event. Finally, justice is served.

Perhaps the most impressive part of this story is that I typed it with one hand. Do you people want a video after the jump? Because there’s a streaking video after the jump.

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