Notre Dame quarterback Tommy Rees spent his Saturday at Ross-Ade stadium, leading the Fighting Irish to a 38-10 win over Purdue Boilermakers. A fight in the stands during a game at Ross-Ade is nothing unusual, especially between drunk college football fans and pissed-off working types stuck making boilers all day, but this one was special — Tommy’s 21-year old sister Meghan was involved, and she was arrested on charges of public intoxication.

From The Exponent, which sounds like something I had to find in math:

Purdue Police Captain Eric Chin said at around 8:30 p.m. officers received a report of a fight occurring in section 116 of the stadium. When the officers responded to the report, fans pointed to Rees as the one causing the disturbance.

“We did discover that a Meghan Rees was implicated as being one of the individuals involved in the disturbance in 116 and she was escorted out of the stands and into the concourse,” Chin said.

All he needed to do was add “particular” in front of “individuals” and he would’ve given the most cop statement of all time. Pictured right is Meghan, looking a little worse-for-wear than her Twitter user photo, and you can click it to see the full-sized version. Hopefully she’ll be healed up and ready to go in time for Saturday’s game against Air Force and will be drunk enough to fight their tough dad dressed like Batman.

As of now there has been no official statement from Tommy or Notre Dame, but hopefully the press release from Tommy just says, “heh, my sister’s a trip, right” and Notre Dames says nothing.

Yes. If I get the ability, I will post one dunk video. It’s not Blake Griffin, though, so you’re lucky. The dunker and…. dunkee(?) are both very white. The dunker is Kyle Kuric from Louisville, and I don’t know the name of the other guy, but he’s from Notre Dame. He should get in the witness protection program, since he can never show his face again.

Video after the jump.
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We’ve already made a case for Andy Reid, who couldn’t manage a clock if it was jammed into a serving of chicken marsala. But here are four other coaches, college and pro, who have come up short in their respective 2009 campaigns.

Eric Mangini, Cleveland Browns. Some people can step into a new organization and sling their dick anywhere they want, because as long as the team wins, they’re cool. But unlike Josh McDaniels in Denver–who was taking over an underperforming playoff-caliber team, Mangini hasn’t delivered the results that were expected from such dickery, and he’s likely to be a one-and-done coach as the Browns seem to be heading backward. Again.

2009 Wins: One, a 6-3 puntfest against Buffalo. And Buffalo sucks.

Charlie Weis, Notre Dame. The man who brought “FUPA” into the blogger lexicon, Weis might be the only coach in America with a signature loss, the Bush Push game in 2005. Weis was expected to have a chance to run the table in 2009, but he’s already lost three games (including losing to Navy at home on Saturday) with three to play.

2009 Wins: Six, with only two (Nevada, Washington State) by more than seven points.

Rich Rodriguez, Michigan. Charlie Weis with about half the calories. This is the only guy that would leave the Maize-and-Blue faithful pining for the days of Lloyd Carr. DickRod and Michigan seem to fit like OJ Simpson and those gloves, but with all the money they’re paying that guy, one might expect for this divorce to be even bloodier.

2009 Wins: Five, with all but one (Indiana) against non-conference teams, including a 63-6 drubbing of Delaware State. Awesome.

ASYLUM POLL: Who’s the worst coach in all of football today?

Some NFL teams gave Charlie Weis a call during Notre Dame's bye week (who could possibly be looking for a new coach?), but the former New England offensive coordinator is going nowhere. 

"Everyone knows I'm staying here until they fire me or I die. I'm here for life. That's what I said I was going to do. So why would I not be a man of my word?"

Gee, I wonder why Charlie Weis isn't going anywhere. Probably because he doesn't like the sling and crane necessary to move his fat ass around. I mean, I'm sorry his gastric bypass didn't work, but c'mon. His face has the sunken eyes and ashy complexion of someone who's already had three heart attacks. He's staying at Notre Dame until he dies, all right. I'll put the over/under at 2.5 years.

And take the under.