Quarterbacking is serious business, especially when you’re a junior in college. So when your teammates fall over like fainting goats to prank you because they think it’d be funny, you gotta SPIKE THAT BALL and RUN AWAY.

That’s what Bryn Renner did. Brynner. He became a reasonable level of enraged when his teammates tried to have fun, took off his helmet, ran downfield and refused to high-five any of them when he went back into the huddle. You see, Brynner is not here to play games. If you’re going to be a goat in Bryn Renner’s presence, you’d better be a goat on all four legs goddammit.

The clip:

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Nolan Smith scored 34 points–a career high–as Duke came from behind to beat North Carolina last night at Cameron Indoor Stadium, 79-73. Fellow black man Seth Curry added 22 points of his own. How did your team managed to fall 16 point behind, Coach K?

“It wasn’t an X-and-O adjustment. … They were too excited,” Krzyzewski said. “‘Nuts’ is the word. What are you guys doing? It’s not like, ‘You know, you guys aren’t playing hard.’ They’re playing hard. … When you go like that, you’re not coordinated, and it was more to get a coordinated effort on the offensive and defensive ends.”

–Rivals/Y!

Fifth-ranked Duke have now won 33 straight at home; they assume the lead in the ACC. That’s fine, because I’ve developed fresh anger for the pompous ass that is Roy Williams. Hating Duke is so 2004; they’re not the scrappy, deceptively fast program that they used to be. Would you believe me if I told you that six of the 12 Dookies listed in their media guide were African-American? I’m not very good with math, but that’s, like, a lot.

One of the greatest rivalries in sports was renewed last night, but only one team showed up. North Carolina’s struggles continued last night as coach Mike Krzyzewski and Duke beat the Tar Heels in their own building last night, 64-54. It was an ugly game that saw both teams shoot no better than 35 percent from the field.

“I thought it was a gritty performance,” Krzyzewski said. “The ball was not going in and they blocked a lot of shots. … For us to keep up our defense and rebounding when the ball wasn’t going in the basket was a big thing.”

The Blue Devils had lost six of seven meetings during a stretch that seemed to signal a shift in power between the programs back to the light blue in Chapel Hill. North Carolina (13-11, 2-7) has won two national championships, including last year in Detroit, since Duke last went to a Final Four in 2004. –Y! Sports.

Duke and UNC will close out the season in Durham on March 6th, and then the ‘Heels will almost certainly have to win the ACC tournament to get into the field of 65. Roy Williams’ squad, one year after winning the whole thing. It’s conceivable that the ACC could send eight teams to the tournament–and UNC wouldn’t be one of them. Unreal.

It was as close to date rape as basketball’s national championship game ever came. North Carolina jumped out to a 24-9 lead over Michigan State in the first half and never looked back. Carolina’s Ty Lawson led all scorers with 21 points and North Carolina cruised to immortality with an 89-72 win. The Tar Heels avenge their own GHB-laced tournament ouster from a year ago at the hands of Kansas. It’s nice to know that the state of Kansas is occasionally good at something.

Now to important business, the winner of St. Andrew’s Pool was tenaciousad_1, who also finished in the 100th percentile of all ESPN brackets. Congratulations to him and thanks to all 1,022 of you that screwed up and didn’t win. Wasn’t that fun? You know, for the first weekend?

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Singler’s miss wasn’t nearly as awesome as Vince Carter’s flubbing of this alley-oop in Chapel Hill (after the jump), but at least Carter missed spectacularly, and that always counts for something. Especially field sobriety tests. Read the rest of this entry »

MLB – The Angels already clinched something that matters – the division crown – now they get to bask in the glow of individual achievements. Even if they’re ones people scarcely care about. K-Rod tied Bobby Thigpen’s 1990 single-season saves mark by closing out last night’s 7-4 Angels win over Seattle. What good is a record if it doesn’t produce a souvenir that some crazed fan can auction for $3 million. Not very good at all…Feisty old man Jamie Moyer gave the Phillies five and two-thirds innings of solid pitching and Ryan Howard homered and doubled in another run as Philly beats to Brewers to gain ground in the Wild Card race…With the White Sox losing to the Blue Jays, the Twins fail to gain any ground, wasting Francisco Liriano’s longest start in two years (8 IP, 2 ER, 6 Ks) then fall to the Royals in the extra frame… Kerry Wood gave up two hits in the 9th but just can’t manage to blow the save. Ah, saving it for the playoffs. I gotcha, Kerry.

College Football – After failing to revive the Cleveland Browns, Butch Davis looks like he’s pulled it off at North Carolina. The Tar Heels crushed Rutgers 44-12 for their first win outside of their home state in six years. In their defense, crushing Duke on the road is so much fun, why would you bother doing it anywhere else?

NFL – As a precaution for the sports world-destroying Hurricane Ike, the game between the Ravens and the Texans has been pushed back to Monday night. So Week 1 won’t be the only MNF doubleheader with one good and one unwatchable game. Oh thank goodness.