Yeah, I know those aren't LeBron 9's but I wear flip flops 24/7 so deal with it.

It was announced on Saturday that Miami Heat forward LeBron James was awarded MVP for the third time in his career, after leading his team to a 46-20 regular season record and the No. 2 seed in the East. James averaged 27.1 points per game this season, while his “Big 3” cohorts Dwyane Wade and Chris Bosh averaged 22.1 and 18 ppg, respectively. Sure, it’s like saying that James was the fastest of the Ferraris, but it’s hard to argue that he doesn’t once again deserve the NBA’s ultimate individual honor.

For his hard work, James’ other “employer”, Nike, has also awarded him with this special new pair of LeBron 9’s that he wore yesterday in the Heat’s 95-86 victory over the Indiana Pacers…

Of the shoes, a Nike spokesperson said that they’re a reward for the company’s “Employee of the Year” – a shame, because I thought for sure that would go to LeBron’s douchebag yes-man and sideways peace sign giver, Jason Petrie. I’ll admit, though, it would be pretty cool to know that you’re the only person on Earth who has a specific pair of shoes that were designed solely for you because of an incredible accomplishment. You know, if that were true.

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LeBron James with Jason Petrie (R) making Kenan Thompson seem awesome.

On Saturday, Chicago Bulls fans watched in horror as Derrick Rose’s struggles to remain healthy this season came to the worst case scenario conclusion, when his knee buckled on a play late in the 4th quarter, resulting in a torn ACL. A lot of people asked the question: “Why the hell was he still in with a 12-point lead and very little time left?” But mostly the answer just came in tears. Even I couldn’t help but feel bad and try to cheer Rose up a little.

Alas, this is competitive sports – a world of us-against-them, heroes and villains and people who just don’t have much common sense. For instance, Nike shoe designer and #TeamLeBron yes-man Jason Petrie watched Rose’s injury take place and his reaction was that Tweet you see above. In this case, Pooh is Rose and Petrie is somehow insinuating that the brand that you rep determines whether or not you’ll suffer a serious injury.

Petrie, though, as most people in certain jobs that could be affected by asinine comments like this often do, later apologized in the most sincere way imaginable.

Adding: “Yo, but 4 reelz y’all, D-Rose need-a comeback in dem new Nikes, cuz Adidas gon giv him MLS.”

Petrie obviously apologized once half the Internet wrote about his insult yesterday, and it was probably after he received a memo from Nike on showing a little more tact on social media. His Tweets are sent from a personal account, which he chooses to use to promote the Nike brand, and most notably plant his lips on James’ billionaire butt, though we can’t really blame him for being a feeder fish with a sweet gig.

As far as James, none of this should really fall on him, but hopefully the remarkable PR effort he’s made this season has taught him to shove one of Petrie’s own fresh designs up his ass for this one.

The best part of this Futsal argument escalating into a Muay Thai knockout (besides me learning what the hell “Futsal” is) is easily the YouTube commenter explaining his motivations:

This was in Russia , futsal 3rd division. I’ve asked the guy why he did that and he said he was pissed off because of the taunting on the missed tackle and being called gay.

I also would’ve accepted “he was told to stick a rubber hose up his nose so he shootkicked his opponent to death”. (via Sportress)

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Links

UFC 145: Jones VS. Evans Live-Blog With Vince Mancini And Danny Boy Downes This Saturday |With Leather|

Nike Bans Midnight Releases, Initiates Twitter RSVP Policy But Will It Help? |Smoking Section|

TV’s 20 Greatest Original (Non-Theme) Songs |Warming Glow|

We Handicap Some Joseph Gordon-Levitt “Dark Knight Rises” Rumors |Gamma Squad|

Move Over Rebecca Black, We’ve Got Hot Girl Problems |UPROXX|

Carnival is offering a Saw-themed cruise for torture-porn masochists |Film Drunk|

Meme Watch: Bad Luck Leo Is Here To Divert Your Attention From Leonardo DiCaprio Banging Models |UPROXX|

The Internet’s Obsession With Hologram Tupac Extends To An Amazing Video And All-Hologram Coachella Poster |UPROXX|

Esquire & Chrissy Teigen Create New Rules For Concert-Going |Smoking Section|

Supercut: Movie students giving dumbass answers |Film Drunk|

Jeremy Lin, Tim Tebow Part Of Time’s 100 Most Influential People In The World |With Leather|

Who Really Gives You The Best Value For Your Used Games? |Gamma Squad|

The Return of Bob Loblaw and More ‘Arrested Development’ News |Warming Glow|

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Every few years, a TV network or a shoe company decides that sports guys should be super heroes. It happened with NFL Superpro, it happened with the Super Sluggers and now it’s happening to Kevin Durant. Or a Powerpuff Girl that sorta looks like Durant, I haven’t figured it out yet.

From the YouTube description:

The evil Dr. Deflation has escaped from Air Max security prison and is hellbent on stealing all of the world’s air. The Air Alliance made up of Charles Barkley, Ken Griffey Jr., Bo Jackson, Clay Matthews, Kevin Durant, Megan Rapinoe, and Allyson Felix, are on a mission to defeat him. Nike’s best Air products are available at Foot Locker including the Nike Air Max Griffey Fury, Nike Diamond Turf II, and the Nike Air Max NM.

If I’m making a Kevin Durant super hero named “Durantula” I’m gonna give him eight arms, or at least some sort of spider power more obvious than creating basketball Hadoukens.

Regardless, check out the preview video after the jump.

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The NFL and Nike invited fans from all over the globe to New York City yesterday to unveil the league’s brand new uniforms, as they were presented by one player from each team. As we know, the league’s contract with Reebok expired recently – and not without some awkwardness – and Nike was ready to usher NFL players into a new era of slightly different alterations and aerodynamic thingamajiggies. Our Uproxxian colleague Gotty was on hand to check out the entire new collection, if you want to view the whistles and bells, but the only team that actually received a total makeover was the Seattle Seahawks.

In case you didn’t get to watch much Seahawks action last season, the old uniforms looked like this:

They’re not terrible by any means, but they do lack those essential things like ZAZZ!!! and BOOM POW ZING!!! Thankfully, Nike has a team of experts who majored in those fields at their secret underground universities in the Pacific Northwest, and they were able to give the Seahawks their much needed overhaul. I’m giving it an A+ with two snaps and a sugar shaker from my muffin maker.

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Seriously, I walked by that thing and suddenly knew how to use tools.

Burnsy and Danger Guerrero have been handling things for me while I’ve been Nike Fuelin’ it around Austin for SXSW, but I’m back today, so expect a lot of things that have nothing to do with sports people enjoy. I’ve got a lot of South By shows to recap, but I don’t have to actually go anywhere today, so Skyrim With Leather promptness, here I come!

- Follow us on Twitter @withleather
- Follow me personally @MrBrandonStroud and Burnsy @MayorBurnsy
- Like us on Facebook.

Links

Funny, Sexy, And Austin Cosplay of The Week: SXSW Screenburn Arcade - It’s not exactly “watch a singer-songwriter play in a church”, but I got to take pictures of nearly naked guys dressed like Zangief, so read that. [Gamma Squad]

SXSW Screenburn Arcade Spotlight: The Unexpected Genius Of Minicore Studios - Imagine if Angry Birds had a crazy backstory where the yellow bird has schizophrenia. That’s these guys. [Gamma Squad]

UPROXX @ SXSW: Skateboarding And Dodgeball At The Nike Fuel Lot - Sports also happened! If I hadn’t had strict “go see Ingrid Michaelson” orders that I gave myself I would’ve taken pictures of the Livestrong run, too. [With Leather]

UPROXX @ SXSW: Quiet Company At The Main - This is one of those bands that can bang a wooden spoon against a Speak & Spell and make it sound beautiful. [UPROXX]

UPROXX @ SXSW: TeenGirl Fantasy And Star Slinger Pitchfork Showcase At The Mohawk - Wherein I share the building where I watch Anarchy Championship Wrestling with 200 people who read Pitchfork. The word “sonic” is used 75 times. [UPROXX]

UPROXX @ SXSW: David Liebe Hart Band At The Jr - This is the show recap the Corinnians read again and again. [UPROXX]

UPROXX @ SXSW: Skrew At The Jr - I still feel weird typing that headline. One day I hope they put “influential industrial metal” on my tombstone. [UPROXX]

UPROXX @ SXSW: Fiona Apple At Stubb’s - Not ashamed to say I waited in line like 2 1/2 hours to be front row for Fiona Apple. Now if only The Cardigans would show up at South By, I’d have my two favorite almost cool female singers from the 90s in one place. [UPROXX]

UPROXX @ SXSW: Action Bronson And DaVinci At Lustre Pearl - Aside from maybe The Black Belles, this is the guy I left SXSW wanting to see again the most. More rap songs about Barry Horowitz, please. [UPROXX]

UPROXX @ SXSW: Andrew WK And Screaming Females At Bar 96 - Set list spoiler: he played a bunch of songs about partying. You knew I’d end up at the vegan-something party, didn’t you? [UPROXX]

UPROXX @ SXSW: Motion City Soundtrack At Clive Bar - Pretty sure either “Brick” or “Mortar” left me a negative comment on this one. In response to his question, I’m not really qualified to be doing anything. [UPROXX]