NL – Jim Edmonds, left for baseball dead after being dumped by San Diego earlier this year, continues to validate the Cubs' faith in him despite being in the neighborhood of 300 years old. His was the standout performance in the coda of a four-game sweep of the Brewers. Edmonds homered twice, one a grand slam, and drove in five runs. Rich Harden had a fine performance of his own, holding Milwaukee to one run and striking out nine in seven innings…The battle for the most underwhelming division in baseball got underway in Chavez Ravine, with Arizona taking the opener by a 2-1 mark. Brandon Webb picked up his 15th win, improving to 8-0 in his last nine starts against the Dodgers. Manny gets to be Manny in L.A. for the first time tonight facing Randy Johnson. Great, Yankees-Red Sox matchups transposed onto other teams…Anibal Sanchez won his first start in 15 months, an easy task when your team puts up 12 runs of support…The Braves avoid a four-game sweep by the Cards…The Nats lost their ninth straight in the fnal of a three-game sweep by the Phils, but they released Paul Lo Duca, so they won't at least be weighed down by underage girls in the clubhouse. 

AL – The worldbeating Angels beat some more world last night, stomping the Yanks in New York 12-6 with homers of the three-run persuasion by Vlad Guerrero, Torii Hunter and Juan Rivera. But you can't win lop-sided games every day. K-Rod's gone a whole three days without a save!… Twins fans, no doubt showing their outrage for the stolen wheelchair, pelt the field with baseballs and field prompting a brief stoppage in play. They'd eventually leave happy – happy as you can be in Minnesota at least – with Minny scoring seven in their final two at-bats to take three of four from to White Sox, pulling back within a half a game in the Central…And the Indians and Mariners both won! On the same day! I hope you'll remember where you were during that once-in-a-lifetime occurrence. (I was beating it).

OLYMPICS – You know your city has a pollution problem when the press writes news stories when they can actually see the sky. Just sayin'.

NL – The pivotal four-game NL Central showdown in Miller Park has been thus far been a one-sided affair, with the Cubs taking the first three from the Brewers. Last night it was Ryan Dempster striking out nine and allowing one run in seven innings.  Up until a solo homer by Prince Fielder in the 9th, it was pitcher Manny Parra who was responsible for most of the Brewers offense, doubling and tripling in two at-bats. Probably not a great sign…With the Brewers momentarily lagging, the Cardinals leapfrogged them into second place with their third straight win over the Braves. Chris Carpenter looked promising in his first start since Opening Day of last year, allowing one runin four innings…Chase Utley snapped out of his homer drought Tuesday and added another last night as the Phillies climbed into first place in the East while handing the Nats their eighth straight loss…The latest Manny Ramirez suitors, the Marlins, knocked the Mets from their first place perch thanks to Josh Johnson's first win in nearly two years and Dan Uggla's 26th homer… And Aaron Cook has 14 wins. Yeah. Really. I'm scared too.

AL – Somehow the Yankees swindled the Tigers into not only taking Kyle Farnsworth but also giving up something of value, namely Pudge Rodriguez, in exchange for him. Positively staggering. Also the Bombers avoided an embarrassing homefield sweep by the Orioles by putting up 13 runs highlighted by two Bobby Abreu homers… The newly fearsome Angels (even though they were already had the league's best record) completed a sweep of the Red Sox in Fenway despite their new gun Mark Teixeira going 0-for-4 with two strikeouts…The Rays build their lead to three games with a 3-2 win in Toronto…Carlos Quentin allows to White Sox to keep their Central lead over the Twins, springing Chicago to a 8-3 win with three hits, a homer and 4 RBIs. He has 21 RBIs over his last 17 games…A 14-12 game and the Rangers aren't involved? The Tigers bounce back from a 8-1 deficit to the Indians and ended up winning in 13 innings. Kelly Shoppach had five extra-base hits, equaling a Major League record, in a losing effort.

NFL – The Packers reportedly offer Brett Favre $20 million over 10 years to stay retired. That covers a lot of bingo buy-ins, Brett. In news related to other overrated white NFL media darlins, John Lynch is leaving the Broncos and contemplating where to go next. My guess: John McCain rally.  

Update: Ken Griffey Jr. got traded to the White Sox. So, welcome back to the Junior Circuit…Junior. The 10 games you play before getting hurt should be thrilling.

AL - The Angels, owners of the league's best record, had a busy evening, acquiring Braves slugger (and, ugh, Baltimore native) Mark Teixeira for Casey Kotchman. Later on, John Lackey came within two outs of no-hitting the Red Sox in Fenway, before Dustin Pedroia broke it up with a single to left, followed by Kevin Youkilis spoling the shutout with a two-run homer. Try to be happy with the complete game win, big fella. The Halos are 7-1 this year against Boston, a team they have a problem with getting swept by the playoffs…The Rays take advantage of Red Sox and Yankees losses with a shutout victory in Toronto to extend their AL East to two games. In doing so, they become the first team to beat Roy Halladay three times in a season since, well, the Red Sox last season. ZOMG!…The Twins parlay a five-run 5th to take a 6-5 win over the White Sox and pull within half a game in the Central. Should've been quiet Jose, now the little piranhas will feast…The Rangers win in typical Rangers fasion, by an 11-10 mark and Ichiro gets his 3,000th hitof his professional career. Awful cute of everyone to pretend like the ones in Japan count.

NL - Carlos Zambrano, feeding off the aw-shucks-it-sure-feels-like-October atmosphere in Milwaukee, pitched eight scoreless innings and outdueled Ben Sheets with the fourth time in six head-to-head matchups…Arizona's Doug Davis has a big game tease of his own, going perfect through 6 2/3 before Brian Giles wrecks his shit with a single. Still gets the shutout win. Like those are special over the Padres… The Mets top the Marlins 4-1 and the Phillies scored multiple runs, so they obviously beat the Nationals.

Transactionland – Ron Artest got dealt to the Rockets for a crappy point guard, the rights to Donte Green and the first round pick of a likely playoff team. The Saints come to terms with first-round pick Sedrick Ellis and annoying former Dukie Luol Deng looks to finally get his long-term deal with the Bulls.

Three Cubs fans attacked a White Sox fan at a two-year-old's "Sesame Street"-themed birthday party.  The Sox fan, Robert Steele, lost his eye after a kick to the head from a steel-toed boot fractured his orbital bone.  Pretty classy.  From the AP:

Jaroslaw Czapla, 31, Boguslaw Czapla, 37, and Maciej Trojnar, 33, face charges of mob action and aggravated battery.

Now wait just a damn minute.  The angry drunk Polish brawlers cheer for the Cubs?  Didn't they get the stereotype memo?  They're supposed to be drinking Old Style at a dusty corner bar on the South Side that depreciates the value of the University of Chicago campus.  The Northwest Herald:

Steele and his fiancée, April Bieze, said they went to the Abby Cadabby-Sesame Street-themed party that afternoon for Bieze’s 2-year-old niece. Bob Czapla and the other men were drinking vodka and beer and started taunting Steele with claims that White Sox fans had missing teeth, Bieze said. We were going to leave, but they convinced us that they were just joking around,” Bieze said.

Yet the taunts escalated and turned more personal, Steele said. Bob Czapla punched Steele, and the pair began to struggle before the two other men helped knock him to the garage floor and started kicking him in the head.

But aside from the brutal beating resulting in the loss of an eye, it was a really nice party.  Elmo and Big Bird did a great job of distracting everyone from the paramedics and the pool of blood in the garage.  Lots of balloons, too.  Kids love balloons.

[Chicago Bull / Luol's Dong] 

NL – The Cubs are the first NL team to solve the paunchy mystery that is C.C. Sabathia. Chicago chased the Brewers' second most prized fatty after Prince Fielder with two runs in the 7th in jumping to a 4-3 lead. Milwaukee let C.C. off the hook for the loss by tying it in the bottom of the inning. In the 9th, Derrek Lee sparked a two-run rally with a one-out RBI double to score Alfonso Soriano and added another for a 6-4 win in the opener of the four-game set… Because no one's really all that interested in winning the NL East, the Mets gave up five runs in the 8th to fall to the Marlins, who in third only trail first place New York by a game, which would be really dramatic and shit if it weren't still July… With Cubs anf the Brewers duking it out for first, the Cards found their bats again for a night, hammering the Braves for 12 runs. Albert Pujols drove in three runs and Joe Mather went 3-for-4 with a homer and two RBIs. Pirates' starter Ian Snells wins for the second time in 18 starts and decides not to jinx his impending winning streak by talking to reporters. Over ever pitching again. It's nice to go out on top.

AL – It's a big AL East stumble to the stretch run with the Rays, Red Sox and Yankees all losers last night. Looks to be gearing up for a fascinating and exhaustively covered denouement. Oh yeah, and somewhere in there was K-Rod's 44th save of the season. Or the week. I dunno. Is it possible he gets multiple saves per game somehow? If I cared, I'd look into this…In other contested races, the Twins drew within a gamke and a half of the Pale Hosers by blanking them 7-0. Denard Span hit his first career homer to get the scoring started.

Misc. – Adonis-bodied bust Kwame Brown signs a two-year deal with the Pistons. Because Detroit has all sorts of good luck with the Kwames. Nenad Kristic jumps on the Cornstein Express to sign with Triumph Moscow. In players that aren't jumping nations, the Warriors re-sign Andris Biedrins for $62 million over six years…And the NFL won't provide further punishment to Marshawn Lynch for his hit-and-run incident, citing continued play in Buffalo is castigation enough.

On the same weekend that former Brady Quinn receiver (hee hee! -Ed.) Jeff Samardzija made his debut at Wrigley, Notre Dame football coach Charlie Weis led the crowd in "Take Me Out to the Ballgame" — only Cubs fans didn't seem to get the lyrics quite right.  They replaced the first couple of lines with robust booing.

This marks the first time in recorded history that Cubs fans have done something cool. 

[Every Day Should Be Saturday]