New Zealand seems to have a better sense of humor than Australia when it comes to double entendre, as evidenced by the reaction from organizers of an Aussie netball tournament upon learning of the team name of one of its entrants.
A West Coast netball team competing in an Australian tournament at the weekend have been forced to change their name as organisers raised concerns over a possible double meaning.
The Greymouth side, formerly known as the Master Baiters, are headed for the Sydney World Masters Games under the title new Master Netters - a less risque reference to whitebaiting. via.
“Whitebaiting” is actually a term referring to fishing, and not pissing off Caucasians. I felt compelled to point that out. It’s too bad, because “Master Netters” does nothing to make me giggle like a 12-year-old.
Logan Campbell competed in the Taekwando event in the Beijiing Olympics, but he’s spending his offseason recovering just like any other guy…aside from the fact that he’s opened up a brothel in his native country, which recently decriminalized prostitution.
His own costs leading up to Beijing totalled some NZ$150,000 (£58,000) [About $94K US --Ed.], much of it provided by his hard-working parents, Campbell noted.
To take the financial strain from his parents Campbell has gone into partnership with Hugo Philiips, a 20-year-old accountancy graduate, to set up what the pair insist is a “high-class” escort agency.
He hopes to take a couple of years off to work full-time on the new venture, before returning to training in 2011 with a NZ$300,000 Olympic kitty.
He said “kitty.” But Campbell insists that’s he’s not a pimp.
“Pimps are more tough-type guys. I’m an owner of an escort agency.”
Whatever, pimp. You just keep on pimpin’. The guy that beat Campbell went on to win the bronze, for whatever that’s worth. Hopefully Campbell’s mat technique will not have eroded from chops and kicks to backhand face slaps and varied utterances of “Bitch better have my money.” But if that’s where he works, where does he go to totally abuse some random woman? Olive Garden? Yeah, it’s late in the day. I got nothin’.
|via So Much For College|
When you live in New Zealand, boring ol’ rugby with clothes won’t do, apparently. So once a year (I suppose whenever it gets warm enough), two teams of seven players each get together in the quaint little town of Dunedin and play rugby butt-ass nekkid.
The nude rugby international, which started as a celebration of New Zealand’s national nude day, was held yesterday as a warm-up – although temperatures were reportedly cold enough to prove embarrassing – to the forthcoming match between the All Blacks and France.
Needless to say, there were plenty of tackles flying about with only one interruption … when a fully-clothed streaker ran on to the pitch.
I guess the short shorts weren’t short enough after all. Seriously, it must be great to live in a country where people can just run around naked and then get all grumpy when someone with clothes on interrupts the proceedings. And I still shower with swim trunks on. But that’s only because I like to keep my soap in the pockets.
The New Zealand Olympic men's soccer team hasn't fared too well in Beijing. In three matches, they tied China, got blown out by Brazil and lost to Belgium. You show up on the world stage and lay a turd like that? Well, as long as you're there, might as well give something to the ladies of the world in the form of a shirtless haka following defeat. Preferably to the Flight of the Conchords' "Ladies of the World".
Either that, or they're celebrating their ouster from the tournament so they can dip into their allotment of Olympics condoms. They're the only things in the country that aren't smog flavored.
I'm trying to avoid having to post about shirtless Bob Uecker pics from a few days ago. Sure, he looks like a cross of Bob Barker with Robin Williams' body hair, but I don't want to have to scroll past it. Instead, I'll go with this fine video picked up by Deuce of Davenport of an Australia/New Zealand rugby match last week wherein Greg Inglis made a nice save over the dead-ball line, flicking it back to a waiting Mark Gasnier. Are those the guys from Flight of the Conchords?
Cheap knock-off sports like rugby (Note to foreigners: disregard or die) only serve to remind me that football season is a million months away. And that ball hits the ground anyway. Totally an incomplete pass.
David Beckham and the L.A. Galaxy were just in New Zealand to play an exhibition match against a local Wellington team, and the hobbits that live there must have run out of food because they're bidding on Beckham's table scraps:
Among the items put up for sale on New Zealand website Trade Me are a half eaten corn cob, a nearly empty bottle of Coca-Cola and a single French fry, which the seller said Beckham had dropped while eating on a Wellington street. The chewed corn cob and soft drink came from a chicken restaurant where Beckham ate on Thursday night. The seller was also auctioning the plate and knife and fork she claimed he had used at the restaurant. The French fry attracted an initial bid of one dollar (75 US cents), rising to three dollars by late afternoon Wednesday.
Mmm, floor fries and chewed corn cobs. Reminds me of when I was in Colonel Harland Sanders employ, and these treats were some of our best-selling side dishes. Of course, I would never eat things that had fallen on the the greasy and salmonella-infested floor, but the burly cooks insisted it added flavor. And the customers seemed to enjoy the fare, though I believe knowledge of the secret 11 "herbs and spices" would cause them to lose their appetites. -KD
Via The Offside and the Fanhouse
