There are over 60 games left in the 2012-13 NBA season, so right now is the perfect time to start recording anthems about how your team is unstoppable. Iman Shumpert knows the value of a good anthem, and if anything gets the Knicks to the finals this year, it’ll be lines like, “Knicks Knicks Knicks Knicks Knicks Knicks Knicks Knicks Knicks Knicks Knicks.”

Via Cosby:

If you weren’t aware, Iman Shumpert is an aspiring rapper who also happens to be a promising young talent for the New York Knicks. The 6′ 5″ point guard from Georgia Tech has apparently been spending his time in the studio while out with a knee injury. For his latest ‘banger’ Shumpert remixes “Clique” off of G.O.O.D. Music’s Cruel Summer album, turning it into the “Knicks Anthem.”

I think my favorite part is when he says Knicks.

I’m not a basketball star OR an aspiring rapper, but I’m occasionally inspired to greatness by these sports guys, so I put together a remix of my own. Hopefully this will be the new NEW Knicks anthem, and I hope you like it:

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Our Man Burnsy’s on the road today, so I’m handling the With Leather Watch This. Who likes shoehorned-in wrestling references? Everybody? THOUGHT SO.

Here’s what’s on TV tonight, highlighted by a “seemed like a great idea when we were making the schedule” showdown between the 3-7 Philadelphia Eagles and the 2-8 Carolina Panthers. Sophomore slumpmaster Cam Newton looks to throw more interceptions than touchdowns against Philadelphia’s Michael Vick, a guy who could seriously benefit from Tim McGraw showing up and duct-taping the football to his hands. It’s going to be GREAT, and the Philly sports fans on your Twitter feed won’t be obnoxious about it AT ALL.

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Yay Brittney Palmer!

Yo With Leather Bros and Broettes, we’ve got not one but TWO live discussions rocking your lady’s parts this weekend – UFC 154 and the WWE Survivor Series – so make sure you stop by and hang out. We’re cool people, despite what bullies like Mitch Albom say, so you should want to come hang out with us and make funny comments while grown men beat the crap out of each other. Even if you don’t get the PPV events, you can read our commentary and close your eyes, and it’s almost like you’re actually in the ring, being handcuffed because Brittney Palmer doesn’t understand your love.

So yeah, join our live discussions or something.

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Finally, all my complaining about these weak-ass Thursday night football games has come to an end with a real, honest-to-God fantastic game that is dripping with playoff implications. The almighty Dolphins head into Buffalo as the two teams tied for first place in the AFC East will look to separate what most analysts and experts are calling the closest race of two amazing teams in NFL history. Wait, what…

*trained messenger ostrich arrives from Ontario*

Oh Fonktar, you brought me a note! Ah, it seems the Dolphins and Bills are not tied for first place and they both indeed suck assballs. Well then, thank you yet again, NFL, for this exemplary matchup.

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New York Daily News writer Frank Isola is the kind of reporter that Bart Scott would love to have covering the New York Jets, because he has a reputation for covering the Knicks rather favorably (among other things). But sometimes being in a team’s pocket can have its benefits, which is why Isola is the best in the business when it comes to providing insider Knicks info, and he dropped quite the horrifying Knicks Knugget yesterday.

According to Isola’s “source”, Knicks owner James Dolan is trying very hard to re-hire Isiah Thomas. That sound you hear is a million Knicks fans slapping their foreheads.

“Isiah is very close with Jim Dolan but he’s told me that he’s not ready to jump back into the NBA just yet,” said the source, who was with Thomas on Friday at the Basketball Hall of Fame induction ceremony in Springfield, Mass. “There’s this perception out there that Isiah is desperate to get back, but that’s false. I think it will eventually happen but just not now.”

Isola also points out that the Knicks only have two job openings right now – D-League coach and an assistant coach position under Mike Woodson. If Zeke took the assistant job, it would just add more fuel to the comedy fire, because he sucked as an NBA coach (.341 career winning percentage) and he was horrendous as the head coach at FIU (26-65 career record). I can’t imagine that Woodson would be too pleased adding that legacy of excrement to his staff. And as for the D-League gig, well, please see: college coaching record.

Regardless, until this hilariously unbelievable idea that Thomas isn’t desperate to get back in the NBA and work for the Knicks again to repair his tarnished legacy dissipates, it’s safe to say that Dolan is simply trying to do everything short of moving the team to make sure that every last Knicks fan is wearing Brooklyn Nets gear this season. If he’d really like to complete the bandwagon exodus, he should just have his band play halftime of the season opener.

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Carmelo Anthony has single-handedly destroyed entire nations during the 2012 Summer Olympics, so it should come as no surprise that some countries would love to run up and punch him in the dick. That dream was made flesh during Team USA’s final group game against Argentina.

During the final seconds of the third-quarter — and the U.S. holding a comfortable 102-76 lead over their rivals— little Facundo Campazzo hit Anthony between the legs as the All-Pro forward drained a three-point shot.

Campazzo— who is the backup to the Knicks newly signed free agent Pablo Prigioni— claims that he did not intentionally hit Anthony.

After the game, Campazzo accused U.S. point guard Chris Paul of punching him in the first half. (via The Other Paper)

Ah, the old “I didn’t do it, but he started it” defense. The best part is the side story about Kobe Bryant getting mad at yelling at Campazzo in Spanish, causing the guy to apologize TO KOBE but not Melo. That’s just the way it goes, I guess. Here’s the clip, if you want to see the “confusion” of a guy purposefully punching somebody in the junk and telling us we imagined it.

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