People Are The Worst: Winning Bidder Of Jack Hoffman’s Trading Card Won’t Pay Up

Written by Ashley Burns / 05.21.13

In perhaps my frontrunner for favorite sports moment of 2013, the Nebraska Cornhuskers’ decision to let a 7-year old cancer patient named Jack Hoffman participate in last month’s Spring Game and even score a touchdown has made an amazing impact on the boy’s life. Since that day, he has already had his very own, limited edition Upper Deck trading card printed and he even met with President Obama at the White House. Because of this attention, Nebraska Sen. Deb Fischer also successfully pushed to have Jack’s birthday, September 26, declared National Pediatric Brain Cancer Awareness Day.

There was absolutely nothing negative about this heart-warming story that could seemingly help raise awareness for so many other children throughout the country, as they cope with horrible illnesses. But people are both stupid and horrible, so of course someone had to ruin the fun.

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President Obama Met With Nebraska Cornhuskers Star Jack Hoffman

Written by Ashley Burns / 04.30.13

In what continues to be my go-to feel-better story of the year, 7-year old Jack Hoffman is still riding the high of becoming the Nebraska Cornhuskers’ biggest star football player in the program’s long, storied history. (Obviously, I’ve crossed out the Bill Callahan era with a thick, black Magic Marker.) Jack, of course, is the young brain cancer patient who ran for a 69-yard touchdown during the team’s recent spring game, and that was followed up by Upper Deck creating his very own trading card.

Yesterday, Jack and his family got to visit the White House and meet with President Barack Obama for about 15 minutes to talk about the boy’s incredible spring.

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The 7-Year Old Nebraska Cornhuskers Kid Got His Own Football Card

Written by Ashley Burns / 04.17.13

Earlier this month, the Nebraska Cornhuskers won every Spring Game in America when they allowed 7-year old cancer patient Jack Hoffman to enter the game as a running back and score a 69-yard touchdown as 60,000 fans screamed him on. The players hoisted Jack onto their shoulders and celebrated with him in one of the most touching sports moments that we’ll witness this year.

Well, the moment isn’t ending anytime soon, not if the folks at Upper Deck have anything to say about it. And they do, because the company has made Jack his very own rookie card, and not without an incredible message of inspiration to go along with it.

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The Nebraska Cornhuskers Brought All Of The Allergies To Spring Day

Written by Ashley Burns / 04.08.13

By now you’ve probably seen the video of 7-year old Jack Hoffman taking part in a play at the University of Nebraska’s spring game on Saturday, but if you haven’t you need to skip the rest of these meaningless words and watch it after the jump immediately. Then you can come back and join us.

Nebraska Cornhuskers running back Rex Burkhead learned last year that Hoffman was battling brain cancer so he started “Team Jack” to show his support for the young boy, and that including having him as the star guest at the team’s spring game. On one play, Hoffman came in as the RB and the Huskers let him carry the ball for a 69-yard touchdown as the crowd of more than 60,000 people went crazy. Players hoisted Hoffman on their shoulders in the end zone and then I removed my eyeballs and heart because I don’t want to ever see or feel anything else ever again.

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This Is Pretty Terrible News

Written by Ashley Burns / 08.22.12

Back in July, former University of Nebraska women’s basketball player Charlie Rogers told police that three men broke into her home, held her down, carved horrific homophobic slurs into her body with knives, and tried to burn her home down with her in it because she’s a lesbian. The national response was incredible, as activists and support groups flocked to Nebraska to show their support as an ultimate stand against terrible, unacceptable homophobic acts and hate crimes such as this, and Rogers became the brave new face of survival and the universal need for equality.

Then yesterday happened.

But the Lincoln Police Department said Tuesday that “the physical evidence conflicted with Charlie Rogers’ version of events” and that “extensive investigation revealed numerous inconsistencies.”

Rogers was arrested Tuesday, police said. (Via CNN)

To her credit, Rogers will plead not guilty and her attorney called these charges a “kick in the gut”. It should be noted that this is her second attorney, though, as the first one quit because “things have changed”.

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Sports On TV: King Of The Hill’s 25 Greatest Sports Moments

Written by Brandon Stroud / 08.02.12


King Of The Hill Olympic Torch

Previous ‘Sports On TV’ columns (for ‘Saved By The Bell’ and ‘Full House’) have been fun to write but a pain to suffer through for research, because seriously, have you tried watching an 8th season episode of ‘Full House’ in 2012? Those columns sorta celebrate the badness of sports on TV, and how they get shoehorned in when people run out of love triangles and job jokes don’t have anything to write about.

So it’s with great pride that I present the third ‘Sports On TV’ effort, celebrating the 25 best sports moments from one of the best and most under-appreciated animated comedies ever made, FOX’s ‘King Of The Hill’. If you haven’t seen it before or just flip past it when you’re looking for ‘Squidbillies’ episodes on Adult Swim, the show’s entire 13-season run is available on Netflix streaming and is one of the best ways to spend 130-ish hours. What made the sports on ‘King Of The Hill’ great is that they aren’t accessories to the action … they’re focal points, important or not, just like in real life.

I’m lucky to have some great guest columnists this week, so I hope you enjoy the list. And yeah, there are at least 40 other moments we could’ve included here, so consider this part 1 of an eventual 50 Greatest Sports Moments Of ‘King Of The Hill’. We’ll loop back around when I realize Golden Girls didn’t have 20 sports moments on it.

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