I can’t really add anything to that headline that wouldn’t be redundant, other than that I’m surprised that this kind of thing doesn’t happen to the CEO of Garmin or Tomtom. And just for the record, I prefer the British voices on my GPS navigators. They sound more trustworthy.

Former miner Jimi Heselden, 62, plunged into the River Wharfe while riding around his West Yorkshire estate in Boston Spa on a rugged country version of the Segway. He bought the firm last December and was using one of the machines – which use gyroscopes to remain upright and are controlled by the direction in which the rider leans – to inspect the grounds of his property.

A spokesman for West Yorkshire Police said today: ‘Police were called at 11.40am yesterday to reports of a man in the River Wharfe, apparently having fallen from the cliffs above…”At this time we do not believe the death to be suspicious.” –Daily Mail (UK).

This is where some idiots would say “the jokes just write themselves here.” NO THEY DO NOT. That’s just your lazy way of saying “I think this is really funny and I’m too lazy to infuse my own humor.” Prick. I might be too lazy as well, but at least I’m willing to own it.

Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1315518/Segway-owner-Jimi-Heselden-dies-riding-machines-cliff.html#ixzz10k6jHr2O

This is just your typical story of a red-headed English kid in the southern UK who went back to racing in motorsports after nearly decapitating himself and getting a bunch of screws stuck into his neck. Wow, if his neck was screwed up that bad, I’d hate to see his teeth.

In September 2006, Stewart, then 12 years old, was driving a 1,000cc Mini go-kart when he crashed head-on into a metal barrier at over 50 mph. The force of the hit was so intense that his head was internally wrenched from the top of his neck. Yikes. via.

Anyway, the kid was operated on for seven hours to repair what’s been called a “hangman’s injury,” and nine months later he was walking again. He’s been cleared by doctors to race go-karts, which really doesn’t make any sense to me. Why spell “go-karts” with a K when “cart” is spelled with a C? Good thing Ufford’s on vacation right now or he’d probably have an aneurysm. via.

For all of you that missed the excitement of the Lamb Weston Columbia Cup race, here’s J. Michael Kelly flipping his boat in action from Sunday. We get all impressed when a 14-year-old girl does this, but that’s for entirely different reasons, I suppose. You’d think a grown man would be able to put his craft back on the water where he found it. We can only hope that the Cup adds an aerial component to their program next year.