“Nice coat.” “It’s my bench-warming parka.”
It was a great weekend to bet on road teams in the NFL. Home teams went 3-11 yesterday, getting outscored 415-305 in the sucktastic process. So bully for you, Baltimore, Dallas, and Atlanta: you’re the only home teams that defended your turf yesterday.
But that’s all the praise I’m allotted in the Suck-Off. Let’s look at some of this week’s contenders for shittiest on-field performance:
Titans receivers. Granted, most of the credit for smudging Tennessee’s perfect record should go to the Jets for their excellent performance, but it’s time people started talking about how having a shitty receiver corps is a genuine weakness. And the drops were team-wide yesterday: RBs, TEs, and WRs all contributed to a shoddy first half that saw five drops in just over a quarter of play.
Brady Quinn, Donovan McNabb. One’s a youngster making his third start, one’s an All-Pro with Super Bowl experience. No matter: they both sucked yesterday, and they both got benched for it. Quinn threw two picks and was generally awful at home against the Texans; McNabb saw Quinn’s two picks and raised him a fumble in one half of play against the Ravens, who allowed only a return TD in their 36-7 shellacking of the Eagles.