This gallery may not appeal to the more Hot-Cheerleaders-In-Slow-Motion-inclined members of the With Leather readership, but don’t be afraid to enjoy it, because at some point during the 1970s the Walt Disney Corporation teamed up with Wonder Bread to give away pennant stickers with loaves of bread that are literally nothing but Disney characters destroying college names with puns. Yes, that’s a sentence I’ve written.

As I see it, there are two fine ways to enjoy this:

1. Flipping through and trying to figure out which school each pennant represents, because some of them are a stretch.
2. Losing control of your neck and bashing your head against the desk in a full-body groan when you realize “Mickey Can Skate” is Michigan State, or whatever.

A third way to enjoy it is through the absurdity of the illustrations, like Cinderella doing 2,000 pounds of laundry in her ball gown or Goofy with a broken leg because you can only make so many puns about Tulane. And yes, ACC fans, here is where you learn about how Disney preappropriated your “dook” joke for Duke and made it about fowl royalty a decade or so before you were born. I kept expecting to see a Virginia Tech pennant where Shan Yu from Mulan is holding up a castrated turkey.

Note: Full credit for these goes to Disney, I guess, but credit for putting them on the Internet goes to Jason Liebig.

[h/t Disney Food Blog]

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When someone’s got a restraining order on you, don’t write on their Facebook wall. Trevor Mbakwe, a forward from Minnesota, couldn’t comprehend these rules and was arrested for violating a restraining order his ex-girlfriend had on him.

From the Huffington Post:

Police said Mbakwe was booked into Ramsey County Jail on misdemeanor charges after he posted a message on a St. Paul woman’s Facebook page. The woman had previously filed a restraining order against Mbakwe in Dakota County, and reported the contact to police.

University of Minnesota police took Mbakwe into custody at home near campus and brought him to jail. Bail was set at $500.
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If you haven’t seen the Metrodome roof buckling under the weight of a foot and a half of snow, you certainly haven’t realized that the Minnesota Vikings’ next home game is just five nights from now, when they will host the Chicago Bears. It has been a season of loss for last year’s NFC North champs. They’ve lost their coach, their star wide receiver, their quarterback’s consecutive games played streak, and now they’ve lost their stadium.

Before the Twins moved to Target Field last spring, vinyl banners bearing the likenesses of team stars — Hrbek, Puckett, Oliva, et. al. — hung in the Metrodome. I suggested on Twitter that the torn ceiling panel be patched with another such vinyl likeness: The former Twin Phil Roof to fill the Twins’ former roof.

–Steve Rushin/SI.

But what I don’t understand is why don’t they just rip that big sheet of Teflon off the Metrodome and continue playing in there, but under the elements, the way God intended. But no, they’re asking volunteers to shovel out the University of Minnesota’s digs to play there. Those students are still taking finals, people! Just rip the damn roof off and BAM! Instant stadium.

UPDATE: “Obvious” is now in quotes. It should be obvious why I did that.

Here’s video of the Minnesota Gopher openly mocking Penn State linebacker Jerome Hayes. I mean, he’s either mocking Hayes or saying some sort of counter-prayer to combat Hayes’ prayer. Or he was just talking trash to a guy that was trying to prepare himself for a game. Either way, I disapprove, and I hope he receives a strongly-worded letter from the Mascots’ Alliance. And oh by the way, God LOVES the BCS and hates the Pac-10. He told me so. via Everywhere.

I've spent the last several days (justifiably) disparaging the Big Ten tourney, but this ridiculous ending to Minnesota's upset of Indiana (via Fan IQ) goes a long way in making up for all that painful-to-watch hoops — Blake Hoffarber's miracle shot has definitely given me an anticipatory hard-on for the tourney this week.  Of course, the Golden Gophers then lost to #10 seed Illinois (16-18, 5-13 Big Ten) in the semis, so the Illini have a chance to slip into the NCAAs today if they can upend powerhouse Wisconsin.

The Illini aren't the only unlikely team gunning for the tourney: previously woeful Georgia has shown moxie in the face of the tornado-adjusted schedule in the SEC tournament, as a pair of wins by the Bulldogs yesterday — they had four wins in the SEC all season — has put the 16-16 Dawgs a win over Arkansas away from the conference title and a berth in the Dance.

Other NCAA results: Memphis won its conference tourney for the third straight year; Pitt beat G-town for the Big East title; UCLA are your Pac-10 champs; and Clemson-UNC and Texas-Kansas round out the major conference action on ESPN today.

The Wisconsin Badgers travel to the well-lit Hubert H. Humphrey Metrodome today to take on the mighty Minnesota Golden Gophers to renew the oldest and most-played rivalry in Division I-A football.  Of course they will play for Paul Bunyan's Ax because these states have nothing redeeming and are forced to compete for imaginary implements.  They used to play for a slab of bacon, but that part of the country is much more health conscious now. If you thought they were just a region of worthless fat fucks, you were wrong.  And the girls – top notch. Why don't they have any other Tall Tale college football trophies? Who wouldn't love to see a game for John Henry's hammer, Sally Hemmings' enchanted petticoat, or Joseph Smith's magic golden tablets? In other Big Ten Trophy action today:

• The Sweet Sioux Tomahawk: Northwestern vs. Illinois – The Fightin' Illini appear to be in line for the win and also appear to enjoy pissing off Indians.
• The Old Oaken Bucket: Purdue vs. Indiana – Interestingly, this  bucket is not referred to as "old" in the state of Indiana. This simple pail represents the height of technological advancement to the Boilermakers and Hoosiers.
• The Land Grant Trophy: Penn State vs. Michigan State – lame.

Oh yeah, Ohio State is playing Michigan for the trophy they compete for nearly every year – the Big Ten Championship trophy. -KD