When word hit my Twitter feed yesterday that Washington State football coach Mike Leach was hosting an AMA (Ask Me Anything) on Reddit, I was super excited. “Here,” I thought, “will be the ultimate no-holds-barred takedown of Craig James. The uncensored, gloves-off thrashing that college football fans have been waiting for.” Of course, then I realized that would never happen.

On one hand, you have James, the candidate for the U.S. Senate from the great state of Texas so blinded by his own ego and ambition that he doesn’t even want to admit that he stands a snowball’s chance in the Alamo of winning his election. Still, he’ll talk about his destruction of Leach’s career at Texas Tech at any opportunity, because to him it was all politics. Otherwise, he might have done what his son, Adam, once did and admit that Leach didn’t do anything wrong.

On the other hand, there’s Leach. He just wanted to coach college football again, after having his reputation smeared by James and a few years stolen from his career. Once that thought crossed my mind, I realized that we were in for more of a pep rally. And I don’t have a problem with that, because the result was Leach showing that he really does seem like a good guy. Maybe he’s a politician, too, but at least he does a better job at hiding it.

But don’t worry, he did talk about James, and after the jump, I dug out some of the better questions and answers, as well as some questions Leach didn’t answer that might have yielded more entertaining responses.

And now here are a few of the questions he didn’t answer that I would have enjoyed…

And perhaps the most important question of them all:

If you’re not familiar with the story of U.S. Senate candidate Craig James, it really is quite a tale of scandal, intrigue and unbridled arrogance. Just to catch you up to speed with a dummy’s version – James was a talented running back and attended Southern Methodist University in the heyday of the program’s paid player scandal, and his NFL claim to fame was being ousted by Peyton Hillis as the last white running back to rush for 1,000 yards in one season.

After his short NFL career ended in 1988, James spent the next 20 years as a college football analyst, bouncing around networks, but always having a connection to ESPN, where he would eventually end up. In fact, he thinks so highly of his broadcasting skills that he founded the Craig James School of Broadcasting. And apparently the first lesson you can learn there is how to coddle your underperforming son and use your TV power as leverage in creating and promoting a scandal against a college football coach like Mike Leach.

In 2009, Leach allegedly forced Craig’s son, Adam, to sit in a dark electrical shed as punishment. Leach was eventually fired, and Adam later admitted that he was never forced to sit in a dark shed, was actually told not to sit in that shed, but he did so anyway because he thought it was “funny.” Alas, that is not a story that Craig will ever tell, because he stands by his version and believes that recaps like mine are pure propaganda in a vast conspiracy against his good name.

Or so he basically said in a recent interview (with his daughter) about his current 2012 U.S. Senate campaign, in which he is polling a whopping 4% among voters. Because if you want people to like you, go back to the ground zero of why people hate you.

I should probably point out for the unfamiliar that James is so unpopular that someone created a Google bomb so that anyone searching his name would stumble across rumors that he killed five hookers in college. It’s basically the same thing that Dan Savage did to Rick Santorum, except funnier, because James was responsible for Bruce Feldman getting fired by ESPN and f*ck him for that.

(H/T to Awful Announcing.)

As we gear up for the start of college football with four Top 25 teams in action tonight, I just want to wrap up what apparently was the first day of Twitter for ESPN analyst Craig James. James’ meddling in the Texas Tech program (where his son, Adam, currently plays remains on the roster) ultimately led to the dismissal of Mike Leach, who had been the head coach of that program for ten years, and it’s arguable that the whole thing made James look like an stereotypical “soccer mom,” whose overbearing ways led to the dismissal of one of college football’s better personalities.

And so it might go without saying that James’ Twitter debut was a rather rough one; we’ve taken some of our favorite replies to James over the course of the day and added them here for your amusement. Dennymayo’s is my leader in the clubhouse. Enjoy the games tonight while you wonder how this guy doesn’t sue everyone who stares at his kid the wrong way. Thanks for reading.

7:30 PM ET Marshall at No. 2 Ohio State Big 10 Network
7:30 PM ET Florida A&M at No. 13 Miami (FL)
8:30 PM ET No. 15 Pittsburgh at Utah
11:00 PM ET No. 14 USC at Hawaii

Here’s some video of Craig James’ kid getting thrown out of a Texas Tech practice (presumably) in an undated video, with former Tech coach Mike Leach taking bites out of his ass along the way.

I can’t even stand to watch you f!cking stumble around [with a] sh!tty f!cking effort like you f!cking accomplished something.

Oh heavens! Leach swore at one of his players! He wasn’t nice to him! That’s odd, because I thought that Leach was a football coach and not a cruise director, and that letting one idiot skate with half-assery could undermine his authority with the entire team. Whatever, dude. Yuk it up now while you can, because by the time we get a playoff in college football, it’ll be two-handed touch so that we don’t hurt any of these precious snowflakes. Or at least the douchebag coaches’ kids will be exempt from tackling somehow. Parents ruin everything. –Deadspin.

ASYLUM POLL: Should Mike Leach have been fired?

If you’re wondering how Mike Leach got himself fired from Texas Tech, stop and realize that this guy was his lawyer. That’s funny, I thought it was Spencer Hall, from 30 years into the future, coming back to warn his former self about the impending doom of undercapitalized media. But no, it is Ted Liggett, giving a tour of the two areas where Adam James was…uh…kept? after being diagnosed with a mild concussion. They’re not exactly luxurious, but whatever. Just be sure to credit @RockMNation with this zinger: “The Craig James University Death Toll [now stands at] two.” Indeed.

Vid from KCBD.com, via@BradKernan

SECOND UPDATE: See the “sheds” in question here. Oh, and Leach is still fired.
Here’s the latest on this who Mike Leach/Adam James fiasco: Mike Leach filed a temporary restraining order, which would allow him to coach his team in the Alamo Bowl Saturday. Texas Tech suspended their coach after claims of mistreatment stemming from Adam James, son of some guy on ESPN.

SportsCenter has aired details of an email to AD Gerald Myers–from Tech’s wide receivers coach Lincoln Riley–citing James’ poor work ethic and sense of entitlement. But in fact there have been at least six emails leaked from former members of the Texas Tech football program, perhaps none more damaging to James’ credibility than former Tech quarterback and 2008 Heisman Trophy finalist Graham Harrell:

Adam was on the baseball team his true freshman year at Tech, before he ever joined the football team, and did not make it through the baseball season because of his selfish attitude. After a baseball game in which he felt like he did not get enough playing time, but the team still won twenty to one, he came into the locker room after the game and “pouted and threw a big fit” according another player on the baseball team.

A few weeks later in the middle of the season, he just stopped showing up to practices or game and quit because he was not happy about how he was being treated. One of my roommates was a baseball player on the team and many of my friends were a part of the team that witnessed all of this. These baseball players told me he was “spoiled and selfish” before he ever came to the football team. After quitting baseball he came out for football and his selfish attitude was very evident, as was his laziness. During off-season workouts he often would be caught skipping lifts in the weight room or finding ways to cut corners/get out of conditioning exercises.[..]

Harrell continues:

Adam was a kid that seemed like he had been given everything he wanted his whole life and acted like if things did not go exactly how he wanted someone was treating him unfairly or someone needed to be blamed for his failures. He was a selfish player on and off the field that was counter-productive for our team and would be for any other team.

You can read the rest on Dennis Dodd’s page at CBS Sports, via the Game On blog. But really, this has to end one way or another. It’s like Adam James wanted to make a rape allegation and then forgot that he wasn’t a girl. Three months from now, he’ll probably tell ESPN that he’s pregnant.

• On Dec. 17, James said Leach told trainers to put him in “the darkest place you can find.” James was sent to an equipment shed near the practice field, where a member of the athletic staff checked on James to make sure he did not lean against anything or sit on the floor. James said Leach told him that if he came out he would be kicked off the team.

• When the team returned to practice two days later, on Dec. 19, James said Leach told trainers to “find the tightest, darkest place” for the player. James, in his street clothes, was put in an electrical closet inside the football stadium for hours, again monitored by a member of the athletic staff.

I’m a bit hesitant to bury Leach because (a) his side of the story on FOX Sports isn’t nearly as damning, (b) Leach says that James might have been faking the injury, which I wouldn’t put past the silver-spooned seed of a college football analyst, and (c) because all of this “new learning” talk about concussions seems to be a half-cocked effort into trying to make football “safe.” It won’t be long before other Division I coaches lock up their players in closets. Leach is an innovator like that.

“[Crabtree] has been more successful as a receiver than that guy has a coach at this point,” Leach said to the Sacramento Bee. “Part of the reason is he’s (Crabtree) too shy to be like that…Let’s see how all those non-divas do up in Cleveland this year.”

So one might expect Leach to lighten up some after Mangini invited former Texas Tech quarterback Graham Harrell into Browns minicamp, right? Well…

Leach told the Dallas Morning News he thought Harrell should have been drafted and that NFL teams are missing out.

“The truth of the matter is that the NFL drafts quarterbacks notoriously bad,” Leach told the paper. “That’s indisputable. …

“I don’t have an answer for why they don’t have a skill for drafting a quarterback. Well, I think the priorities are out of order. Accurate and makes good decisions needs to be a priority, not something they need to teach him, because they don’t do that very well.”

It is rather amazing that Harrell wasn’t drafted, but who knows why. Coaches fall in love with players and hate players for seemingly ridiculous reasons. I for one am glad that I don’t pass judgement on human beings with such inhumane objectivity.

“You bring up easily the most pitiful NFL cop-out of all,” Leach said in a telephone interview.

“And you can send that message to the whole NFL. Any coach who has ever said or uttered those words or considers that a concern, here’s my message for them: How could you possibly look yourself in the mirror and consider yourself an NFL coach and not be able to teach a guy to run back three steps, five steps and seven steps? I can teach a child that!

“Any coach in the NFL who can’t do that ought to be fired!”

“I can do that,” Leach said of teaching a quarterback to drop back. “I only need a three-hour window. I’ll have a great clinic for all the NFL coaches who are so horrible that they can’t teach a guy to take a snap under center and go backwards.”

I don’t know why, but every time I see Mike Leach, I envision a delicious plate of ribs being brought to me. It’s like a Bugs Bunny cartoon. I see him, then I see ribs, then I see him again. I wonder if the Texas Tech administration felt the same way. It would certainly explain why Texas choked last fall.

|Dallas Morning News|