Links

What Tim Tebow Is Saying While He’s Tebowing - “Jesusly” is an adjective (adverb?) I’m going to start using daily. [Kissing Suzy Kolber]

40 Awesomely Nerdy License Plates - Yesterday I saw a truck with Texas plates that just said “EARTH”. Who signs up for vanity plates and is all, “you know what? Make it say EARTH”. And “Texas EARTH” for that matter. [Gamma Squad]

Mickey Rourke: “Most Actresses Are C*nts With A Capital K.” - Aside from that remark, this interview is awesome. How did you prepare? I showed up, and there were hot chicks. If his face didn’t look like that, he’d be my hero. [Film Drunk]

Not Everyone Thinks Highly Of Beats By Dre Headphones - Great, now he’s going to push back the release date and feel sorry for himself for a few years. [Smoking Section]

The Best Of #Buster Bluth - He’s a monster. [UPROXX]

Jason Segel and the Muppets Are Welcome to Host ‘SNL’ Any Time - Kermit touching his belly on the “Really” part of Weekend Update is my new favorite thing. I genuinely care more about Kermit than I do most celebrities. [Warming Glow]

Arnold Schwarzenegger Should Do DVD Commentary For Every Movie Ever - This is where I link you to Gamma Squad, and you go there and watch the video about Arnold Schwarzenegger. [Gamma Squad]

The Greatest Mugshot Ever - Our generation in a nutshell, people. [Buzzfeed]

Food Shoved Into Other Food - And bring us the finest food you’ve got stuffed with the second finest. [Adult Swim]

Awesomely Geeky Couple Poses for ‘Star Wars’ Engagement Photos - Sorry, no part of this is awesome. Star Wars scientifically cannot be awesome in 2011. It’s ruined, guys, go watch Babylon 5. [The FW]

Magazine Celebrates 50 Cent’s Five Different Personalities - I guess when he changes clothes it’s a different personality? [Popcrush]

20 Awesome Title Graphic GIF’s of 16 and 8-Bit Games - Super awesome. This is how we should be spending our time. (although I guess that leads to situations like the mugshot, doesn’t it) [Unreality]

Links

Meet Sherman Klump, The Pissed Off Philadelphia Eagles Fan - And speaking of Eddie Murphy losing his dignity, listen to his overweight gent yell “motherf**ker” about the Eagles non-stop for several minutes. [Smoking Section]

UFC Sues New York For Breach Of First Amendment Rights - Sometimes I don’t think people know there’s more than one amendment to reference. I want to drive my car into someone biking on the side of the road and then sue them for impeding my first amendment rights. [Cage Potato]

Fair To Flair - I’m linking you to their podcast tag, because I appear on the next one that goes up. I spent an hour and a half last night yammering on about the Black Scorpion, it was great. You’ll want to hear it. [Fair To Flair]

Warming Glow’s Guide to Celebrity Impersonators You Can Hire on the Internet - Check this out, then compare and contrast it to Progressive Boink’s version from 2005. I think “celebrity impersonator” might rank below “crack whore” on society’s list of sad people. [Warming Glow]

The Movie Dad Hall of Shame - I love that Daddy Day Care is listed as the moment when Eddie Murphy lost his dignity. Not the transvestite hooker thing, Daddy Day Care. [UPROXX]

LA’s “Occupy Twilight” Line As Depressing As You Think - Enghhh. Why not “occupy” the book store long enough to find something good to read? [Gamma Squad]

Expendables 2 Is Scaring Off All Of Bulgaria’s Endangered Bats - Who cares what we’re doing to the world, Dolph Lundgren needs a paycheck. [Film Drunk]

Gosling Was Robbed! - baby goose nooooo [Buzzfeed]

10 Turkey-Flavored Foods That Look Absolutely Disgusting - One turkey-flavored food that doesn’t look disgusting is the bad ass Tofurky vegetarian roast sitting in my freezer right now. Next Thursday is going to rule so hard. [The FW]

‘Community’: Show Your Support and Goatee Yourself! - If you put it on your inner leg you can show support for ‘Whitney’! [AOL TV]

Eight Old-Timey Insults that Need to Make a Comeback - Old timey talk in general needs to make a comeback. I want to be normal, reasonable human Jimmy Stewart, living in a Jimmy Stewart movie where everyone else is doing the NOW YOU LISTEN HERE, SEE thing. [The Smoking Jacket]

The 13 Crappiest Movies of Mickey Rourke’s Career - I don’t think I’ve ever agreed with Pajiba. We should hold an opinion-off. That Bond kid movie looks wretched, sure, but Harley Davidson and the Marlboro Man? Dissing Bob Dylan? Get bent. [Pajiba]

“I’ve got two balloons of black tar inside this little guy”

All aboard the express train to Awesometown, because Mickey Rourke is going to wrestle at Wrestlemania XXV in Houston on April 2nd.

“The boys from the WWE called me and asked me to do it,” Rourke told Access Hollywood. “I said, ‘I want to.’ I’m talking with [WWE legend] Rowdy Roddy Piper about it.” [...]

And when he does jump into the ring with WWE, it appears the actor may already have his sights set on an opponent. “Chris Jericho, you better get in shape,” Rourke added. “Because I’m coming after your a**.”

It remains unclear whether he’ll be wrestling in character as Randy “The Ram” Robinson from his acclaimed performance in the title role of “The Wrestler,” or whether he’ll be in character as Mickey Rourke, Guy Who Pets Chihuahuas on the Red Carpet.  Please let it be chihuahuas please let it be chihuahuas please let it be chihuahuas…