In the picture below, you’ll see someone’s head about an inch from LeBron James’ ass as he soars through the air for a game-winning lay-up in Game 1 of the Eastern Conference Finals. That’s Paul George of the Indiana Pacers. He had his ankles broken, his legs, both of his arms and most of his neck. It’s not even fair.

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Links

Bill Murray Knows How To Respond To Crying Babies |UPROXX|

Mitch Hurwitz Doesn’t Want You To Binge-Watch ‘Arrested Development’ |Warming Glow|

What’s The Deal With The Fast & Furious Movies: An Explainer |Film Drunk|

Dear Lord, Let’s Watch The Memphis Grizzlies Miss 7 Lay-Ups In A Row |With Leather|

This Four-Year-Old Girl Is The Cutest Marvel Comics Expert |Gamma Squad|

This Is How The Top 5 Picks In The 2013 NBA Draft Should Go |Smoking Section|

NFL Analyst Power Rankings (Official) #5- Pete Prisco |Kissing Suzy Kolber|

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"Hey guys, let's make a pack to stay best friends forever."

This is a few days (and years, if you’re a stickler for details) old, but the folks over at LeBronJames.com posted some scanned images of LeBron James’ stat sheets from his high school seasons, and without a single ounce of shock in the entire world, they reveal that he was a man among boys. The self-anointed King and four-time NBA MVP averaged 18.1 points per game in his freshman season at St. Vincent-St. Mary, and it only got better from there, as he averaged 30.4 ppg by his senior season.

James also recently took a break from steamrolling the NBA Playoffs to donate $1 million to his old high school to renovate the gym that helped make him a household name when he wasn’t even old enough to vote. Hopefully, some of that money includes a giant throne for when he returns to view games. It should have a glass case around it like the Popemobile for good measure, since some people in Ohio are still emotionally unsure of how to feel about James, lingering somewhere between, “TRAITOR! I HOPE YOU’RE EATEN BY BEARS!” and “Maybe he’ll opt out in Miami and come back to Cleveland!”

Either way, his old stats should make even the most confident high school athletes feel like they were in the cast of Freaks and Geeks.

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It shouldn’t really surprise anyone that the Indiana Pacers are in the position to advance to the Eastern Conference Finals tonight, as they’re the No. 3 seed in that division and they’re loaded with young, talented guys who can play strong defense. But I’m sure that most people expected the 2-seed New York Knicks to be the team that would ultimately lose to the 1-seed Miami Heat in the ECF. Alas, here we are on the verge of the Pacers pulling off a 4-1 series win over the Knicks tonight, unless Carmelo Anthony and JR Smith can locate their magic and stand up for themselves.

Obviously, a guy like Knicks owner James Dolan up there, seen moping and/or sleeping during Tuesday night’s loss to the Pacers, is going to be upset and embarrassed at this kind of series. But what about the average Knicks fan? Well, one Knicks fan is on his way to a viral video superstar this week, after his video rant about his team going to the NBA Finals hit the YouTubes, and I don’t even know what else to say.

Other than maybe use headphones if you’re at work, because this gentleman’s mouth is of the potty variety.

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I really don’t get you, youth of today. I really don’t. Sure, I did some stupid sh*t in my day, and not a moment goes by that I don’t regret acting like such a schmuck. But with all of the information and education that we have available for us now, there’s almost nothing left that we can get away with. So why on Earth would you let someone record your stupid face as you go gallon smashing in public? Next thing you know, some pro-milk advocacy group is lighting your house on fire and killing your pets. That’s the way the world works these days, folks.

Oh, and there really isn’t much more that I love than watching an a-hole’s face bounce off the cold, hard floor. Because, all jokes aside, adult me will stab a bitch if pranks like this cause milk prices to increase.

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Well, friends. We’re not going to get a better image from the NBA Playoffs than this one, Tweeted by CBS Sports’ Matt Moore last night. Hell, if I were picking the best overall sports photo from 2013, this beauty would already have a giant blue ribbon slapped on it, as it dined for free at Red Lobster this evening.

It doesn’t need much of a recap, obviously, as the Miami Heat absolutely demolished the Chicago Bulls in Game 2 last night – as I and probably everyone outside of Chicago predicted – and Joakim Noah didn’t bottle his emotions very well. Noah was ejected in the 4th quarter after sharing some choice words with official Scott Foster after the refs missed a goaltending call, and as you can see he was greeted by this woman on his way to the locker room.

But there’s more to this woman and her husband – the Heat Bro and Babe, if you will – than just this image, as the video of Noah’s ejection reveals.

UPDATE: This is apparently the woman, according to the Sportress of Blogitude. Wow.

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If you’re happy to see the Miami Heat lose game 1 of their East semis series against the Chicago Bulls, perhaps you’ll like to see the Heat portrayed as rusty Terminators while the Bulls mascot puts out the Miami logo fire by pissing on it. Taiwan Animation, everybody. Stick around for LeBron James drawn like Pitbull.

- Follow us on Twitter @withleather
- Follow me personally @MrBrandonStroud and Burnsy @MayorBurnsy
- Like us on Facebook.

Links

A Brief History Of Zooey Deschanel’s Musical Moments |UPROXX|

Bradley Cooper’s Häagen-Dazs Commercial Is Totally About Butts |Warming Glow|

A FilmDrunkard’s Encounter with Gary Busey |Film Drunk|

Conan’s Terrible Kentucky Derby Horse Names, Featuring Disturbing German Pornography |With Leather|

Pictures Of Emma Stone From The ‘Amazing Spider-Man 2′ Set May Drop A Huge Spoiler |Gamma Squad|

5 Things in ‘Bioshock Infinite’ You Might’ve Missed |Smoking Section|

REMINDER: Peter King Was Worse Than Everyone At Predicting The Draft |Kissing Suzy Kolber|

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