This is Melanie Roach. She's 33, her husband is in the Washington state legislature, and she has three kids (one of which was diagnosed with autism, and the family does a lot of charity work blah blah blah). But I care because Melanie made a comeback after five years off to qualify for the Olympics…

…as a weightlifter.

Roach was the top-rated lifter at the U.S. weightlifting trials, claiming one of four female spots allotted to the Americans. She'll be joined in Beijing by Carissa Gump, Natalie Woolfolk and third-time Olympian Cheryl Haworth.

"This is far better than anything I expected," Roach said. "If I had made the team in 2000, I wouldn't appreciate it nearly as much as I do now."

Roach's comeback was even more remarkable considering she quit the sport for five years to start a family. When she decided to start lifting again, the pain returned, too, forcing her to undergo surgery in the fall of 2006 shortly after she claimed her sixth national title.

Her husband's in politics, so she should be back on the market in…six years? I hope she can keep it going for that long. I mean, Barry Bonds played until he was 43, and no one ever tried to stick anything in his ass…

[Yahoo! News]