Back in 2010, we were introduced to a young couple at a Houston Astros game, as they became instant Internet celebrities thanks to every sports blog on the planet and eventually Daniel Tosh. In case your memory is fuzzy from all the meth, Chris Johnson hit a foul ball into the field box along the left field line, and the boyfriend took cover like a frightened toddler as his then-girlfriend was hit by the ball. Needless to say, that relationship didn’t last.

On Sunday, Brandon Inge ousted the “foul ball couple” as the Internet’s favorite fan f*ck-ups when he belted a 3-run home run off rookie Matt Moore in the third inning, and it smacked a Tampa fan right in the gooners. To make matters worse, the ball ricocheted off the Rays fan’s crotch into his lady friend’s face. Really, it’s the feel good video of the summer.

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In what slowly developed into the most boring and worthless trade saga of this lockout-shortened NFL offseason, the Miami Dolphins finally told the Denver Broncos to F off in regard to Kyle Orton. Various outlets reported that the Dolphins wanted to send two late draft picks to Denver much like the Minnesota Vikings did for Donovan McNabb (two 6th rounders), but Denver wanted compensation along the lines of what the Arizona Cardinals gave for Kevin Kolb (Dominique Rodgers-Cromartie and a 2nd rounder).

Gee, which option did the Dolphins choose for a guy whose offensive numbers came mostly from playing behind?

[Matt] Moore, who spent the previous three seasons with the Carolina Panthers, arrives in Miami today to sign a contract worth $5 million with incentives that could push it as high as $7.5 million.

The incentives are mostly playing-time based, which means Moore would have to unseat incumbent starter Chad Henne, who threw for 3,301 yards and 15 scores while leading the Dolphins to a 7-9 record. (Via Oregon Live and PFT)

This story is boring, I know, but I’m using it to point out that nothing has changed. The lockout may have resolved the Collective Bargaining Agreement issues and ensured the league’s future for the next decade, but it didn’t do anything to solve the stupidity. Arizona gave up a good defensive player and a 2nd rounder for a guy who is unproven, and then they paid him $22 million in guaranteed coin. That’s a brand new precedent set, and Denver bit on it. Of course, it bit Denver in the ass, too, but just wait until Philadelphia signs Vince Young and then trades him next year. All over again.