Last night’s Spurs/Warriors Game 1 went into double overtime and featured a dramatic game-winning three from Manu Ginobli, but the only thing anybody wants to talk about this morning is the “screaming Spurs fan.”

If you watched the game, you may have heard the dulcet tones of a puppy being born for the entirety of the second half and both overtimes. It was just a lady enjoying a great game of basketball with an unfortunate pitch in her voice, but yeah, it sounded like something that would try to kill you in Lord of the Rings. Every time the Spurs scored a basket I could see Frodo fleeing for his life. For The Win put together a list of “Jesus, somebody shut that lady up” tweets from Notable Internet Types, but they’re in good fun, because man was she annoying.

That “good fun” runs out when you leave For The Win and venture into YouTube, where commenters are not afraid to get INCREDIBLY SPECIFIC about why they hate this lady and the things that should be done to her. For your enjoyment (or whatever), I’ve collected a few of the most horrible comments about the Screaming Spurts Lady. Warning: This is the YouTube comments section, and is not suitable for any audience. Reader discretion is advised.

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"And then I gave her an extra $1,000 to take a dump on my chest."

Last night, as I was initially excited to watch what felt like the first honest-to-Cthulhu good Thursday Night Football game of the season, word broke across the Twitters and some sports network that doesn’t like to source other reporters that the San Antonio Spurs would be playing without the team’s stars – Tim Duncan, Manu Ginobili and Tony Parker – against the Miami Heat. And I had to turn away from Kate Upton to do a spit take because I was like, “Well why in the H-E-Hockey-Lockout would Gregg Popovich do that?”

It turns out that he had a pretty darn good reason.

Meanwhile, the game was actually fantastic. I get a kick out of joking that San Antonio is the most boring team in sports, but they’re obviously not and they proved that by leading the Heat the majority of the game before ultimately falling to Miami, 105-100. So what’s the big deal then? Teams play and lose all the time, and teams certainly rest their starters. Well, David Stern ain’t having that nonsense.

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It’s not as low-rent as the Oklahoma City Thunder shilling Jeeps, but here are the San Antonio Spurs in a commercial for steaks from Texas supermarket chain H-E-B because, hey, I have that grocery store!

Fun fact: They say H-E-B stands for “here everything’s better,” but it actually stands for “Howard Edward Butt”. BUY YOUR GROCERIES AT BUTT. (via Bush League Chronicle)

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Links

Writer’s Room: Audiences More Entertaining Than the Movie |Film Drunk|

15 Super Famous Actors Who You May Not Have Known Played Football |With Leather|

Ranking All Of Ol’ Dirty Bastard’s 28 Nicknames |UPROXX|

Today We Learned Sue Heck From ‘The Middle’ Is Super Cute In Real Life |Warming Glow|

Let’s Talk Possible ‘Episode VII’ Directors |Gamma Squad|

Big Boi And Andre 3000 Speak On Outkast’s Future … Separately |Smoking Section|

Tiki Barber Is Hilariously Desperate For Money |Kissing Suzy Kolber|

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Worst Kama Sutra page ever.

Last night’s Western Conference Finals Game 1 between the San Antonio Spurs and the Oklahoma City Thunder was everything that we’ve expected this series to offer us ever since we all predicted that the Top 2 seeds would be playing each other. The Spurs took the first game 101-98, although it wasn’t actually that close, as James Harden made a 3-pointer with one second left in the game that either made a ton of gamblers happy or the complete opposite. But the one thing that every NBA fan expected from this series was no-nonsense intensity and all heart basketball, because these are arguably the two most exciting teams in the NBA. At one point, I think Tim Duncan even nodded his head after someone made a shot. It’s that exciting.

That’s why it was pretty disappointing that in an otherwise entertaining and intense game, Spurs guard Manu Ginobili and Harden reminded everyone how much flopping sucks. In the 4th quarter, with the Spurs clinging to a one-point lead, Ginobili and Harden collided as the former was seemingly attempting a shot and they both flopped. Simply amazing.

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San Antonio Spurs guard Manu Ginobli was wandering the streets last week when he peered into the evening sky and noticed something a bit odd. The Argentinian witnessed two lights seemingly chasing each other or dancing around or just moving – hell, I’m not exactly an astronomer here. Ginobli had the Spurs’ head of security film this interesting occurrence while he offered his insight and, really, who the hell needs NASA when we’ve got this:

“Holy sh*t… what the f*ck… it looks like the Silver Surfer.”

Okey dokey. How about we go to the team at Technically Incorrect for a better explanation…

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With all the noise that vampires and the Twilight movies out, it was only a matter of time before bats started going to NBA games. It’s been all over ESPN today so I guess we had to post it here as well. And leave it to one of the dirtiest players in the NBA to knock that rat with wings out of mid-air. But to be fair, that is an impressive left-handed swat from the Spurs’ Manu Ginobili. But they swat things in Argentina all the time–mosquitoes, girlfriends, the value of their own currency. But mostly girlfriends.