You’d think in that today’s age of “elightenment” that I keep hearing about that we, in the year 2010, would be above making cheap jokes about two guys from Austria in skin-tight suits stacked up on a sled. And you would be wrong.

This is Andreas Linger and Wolfgang Linger of Austria, the Linger brothers, getting ready for another slide down the chute. We have so many Olympians now that we’re just stacking them on top of each other. Supposedly in doubles luge, the bigger guy goes on top, just like in prison. And then…I don’t know, the bottom guy washes the suits?

But to be fair, this is probably like chopping wood compared to whatever it is they do in Austria. It’s just like a big rave over there. I understand that after they check your passport they hand you glowsticks and mesh dungarees. Austria finished first and second, by the way, with the Lingers taking the gold. Fabulous.

Despite the IOC’s washing of hands to absolve the luge track in Whistler for any blame in the death of Georgia’s Nodar Kumaritashvili in training just hours before the opening ceremonies, the committee made changes to the course in order to reduce speeds and, ergo, keep lugers from becoming an endangered species. But not everyone is happy with the changes, especially this luger with one of the greatest names ever [emphasis added].

“It’s slow,” said Austria’s Manuel Pfister, who was clocked at almost 96 mph on Thursday. “It’s completely different. Yesterday, I was able to slide with the medal ranks, today it’s another race. It’s difficult for me. Maybe it’s now too easy.” –AP.

The staring line was moved down the track for both the men’s and women’s courses, and the finish line was moved up past where Kumaritashvili collided with a steel support beam; that area has been reinforced by a 12-foot wooden wall.

[German] Tatjana Huefner, who was fastest down the track in the day’s two training runs, even suggested that the athletes might require a different luge if starting from the juniors’ start.

“It’s the rule and I’ll make the best of it,” the World Cup leader and reigning Olympic singles bronze medallist said. “But you need another sled for this or you need to prepare the sled differently. –AFP.

It’s asking a lot for a group of athletes to suddenly modify their race strategies before the biggest event in their lives. That said, even the smallest crash in the luge events will be under tremendous scrutiny, and this snafu has to be chalked up to Vancouver’s greed to see records broken in its games. It reminds me of the time when I covered the Slip n’ Slide at the family picnic with AstroGlide. You know, as opposed to the time at the “company” picnic. That was totally different.