This season, Coastal Carolina outfielder Alex Buccilli is batting .313 with 3 home runs and 20 runs batted in. How has he achieved such success at the plate? By holding in his sh*ts so long his ass nearly touches the ground.

At least that’s my theory. By way of Busted Coverage comes ESPN3′s favorite new batting stance, the Craig Counsell-infuriating pop-a-squat of Buccilli. Seriously, look at this thing:

He should just sit in the batters box and swing from the ground, or carry in a stool or something and swing from that.

On second thought, carrying in stool might be how he got in this stance in the first place.

For those keeping track at home, this truck has:

New York Yankees logos
Los Angeles Lakers logos
Miami Heat logos
Chicago Bulls logos
Nike logos

And there are more. I’m guessing Alabama, Duke, LSU, Dallas Cowboys and New York Giants logos are also on there somewhere. But before we go passing judgment, I caught up to this guy to get his reason for having all of these different teams represented on his truck:

“It’s totally cool, bro. I was born in New York, my girlfriend is from Miami, I had a 12-hour layover once in Chicago and I can almost spell Los Angeles. So I’m allowed to be fans of all these teams. But seriously, f*ck Boston.”

(Reddit via Sharapova’s Thigh.)