A quick round-up of MLB trade deadline action.
MANNY RAMIREZ TO THE DODGERS — L.A. and Boston each send two prospects to the Pirates, while the Red Sox get Jason Bay. Bay is a minuscule downgrade at the plate, a remarkable improvement in the field, and his salary is less than one-third what Manny makes. Minus the loss of the prospects, nice work by Theo Epstein. He gets his choice of Boston skanks tonight. [Update: Written before I realized Sox were paying the remaining $7M for Manny. Still, if you're coming here for analysis, you're in the wrong place, my friend.]
KEN GRIFFEY JR TO THE WHITE SOX — News of the proposed trade broke this morning, but Junior approved the deal, so it's official. Chicago, which has an outfield of Jermaine Dye/Nick Swisher/Carlos Quentin and a 1B/DH combo of Paul Konerko and Jim Thome, successfully filled a hole it didn't really have.
ARTHUR RHODES TO THE MARLINS – So, okay: not nearly as big of a name as Manny or Griffey, but I felt like I really needed a third story to go with this. Rhodes couldn't have been moved farther away from the Mariners, both geographically and — what with the Marlins not sucking — metaphorically.
NL — Hiroki Kuroda took a perfect game into the 8th inning, but Mark Teixeira's double forced the Japanese import to settle for a one-hitter in the Dodgers' 3-0 victory over the Braves. Must. Not. Make. World War II joke… The Mets tried to blow the nine-run lead that Pedro Martinez staked them to, but could only give up eight runs before the Phillies ran out of gas. Master of Blown Saves Billy Wagner only gave up two runs before sealing the 10-9 win.
AL — Hey, I gotta get one a them Japanese pitchers — they work great! Daisuke Matsuzaka and Hideki Okajima were key in Boston's 1-0 shutout of the Twins. Your gratuitous Dice-K-related cheesecake is here… The mighty Royals cooled off the Rays, snapping the demon fishes' 7-game win streak with a 7-4 triumph keyed by two 10th-inning homers.
NBA — Michael Beasley poured in 28 points in 23 minutes, overshadowing fellow top pick Derrick Rose (10 points) in the Heat's win over the Bulls. Now wait just a damn minute. The NBA? When did that start? Does that league even HAVE an offseason?
Everyone's favorite "child star-turned B-movie hottie-turned village bicycle to Major League pitchers" Alyssa Milano is now blogging over at MLB.com, and motherfuckers, IT'S REALLY HER.
Yes, I really write this blog. Yes, I am a huge baseball fan. Yes, I’ve read all of your comments that you’ve left for me (ouch). No, this isn’t for publicity. And no, my entries won’t come and go like the other high profile blogs you are referring to (of which I am not aware but shame on them).
I have no way of proving any of this to you except to keep going. You’ll just have to take my word for it. I will hopefully convert the doubters. It will be my mission.
Alyssa, I get that shit all the time, believe me. "No way Matt writes this. I heard Justin Timberlake ghost-writes for him." Like, sure, we look alike and date the same girls, but JT thinks "sexy back" is one word. He'd never make it through a day doing what I do.
Oh, right. Alyssa Milano. Anyway, it's actually kind of a sweet and heartfelt piece, and her ghostwriter does a bang-up job of making it sound like Alyssa. And I think it's great she still cheers for the Dodgers even though her ex Brad Penny went younger and hotter with Eliza Dushku. But then, Alyssa's also been linked to Carl Pavano and Barry Zito (and even with Eliza Dushku. But then, Alyssa's also been linked to Carl Pavano and Barry Zito (and even Josh Beckett and Tom Glavine), so she probably can't even pick him out of a lineup at this point. "Hello?… Who's this?…. Brad who?… Which Brad Penny?… Maybe — did we have sex?"
Not that I've ever had that conversation, of course.
First they tore down Ebbets Field. Then they introduced the designated hitter. And baseball's record are tarnished forever by the steroid scandal. But this… this may be the worst of all.
One consequence of the Dodgers' new parking system could be the endangerment of the Union 76 gas station beyond center field, a landmark as old as Dodger Stadium… Surveying the trickle of vehicles driving past his station — on a day that 56,000 fans packed Dodger Stadium — [station operator Chuck] Mercier said, "They've pretty much closed me off."
Mercier said he had e-mailed Dodgers officials about his concerns and hoped that they would try to work with him to ensure the survival of a landmark that has been featured on the Travel Channel as the only gas station on the premises of a major league baseball stadium.
Oh the humanity. What is the world coming to when our nation's landmark gas stations are having trouble staying in business? I had always feared that Big Parking would one day move in one Big Oil's turf, and now that day is here. What's next? Fuel-efficient cars? Where have you gone, Lee Iacocca? Our nation turns its lonely eyes to you.
