When I read that the 9th Annual Valentine’s Day Canine Kissing Contest and Cocktail Party took place last week in Portland, I immediately pictured Fred Armisen dressed as a hideous female as a pink dog with giant ear spacers slobbered his face. However, it turns out that today’s real life Portlandia tale actually comes from Portland, Maine, so I’ve been watching the IFC channel all morning for absolutely nothing.

Regardless, the contest in question featured a number of dog owners (do we really own dogs, though?) and their favorite pooches in a battle to see which human would let his or her furry counterpart lick his or her face the longest. Sadly, none of them tried my old college tactic of drinking too much Rumplemintz and passing out on the dog bed. WARNING: You may also be pissed on.

So who were the big winners at this year’s contest anyway?

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On Monday, we shared with you the best (Cactus Jack) and very, very worst (Hail) of World Championship Wrestling’s 8×10 promo photos from the 1990s. If you thought Dave Sullivan petting a rabbit was as deep as the well ran, you’re in for a treat.

Behold, part two of our epic WCW promo photos quest, once again visiting the pro wrestling company that threatened to put WWE out of business before collapsing in on itself and folding in the shadow of stars like Kwee Wee and Disqo. The next 50 WCW photos tell the story of the company … full of amazing pro wrestling talent, but also (unfortunately) full of everything else. Take a long, hard look at that picture of Ric Flair. If you can’t see the terror in his eyes, you’ll start to pick it up around slide 30.

If you showed part one to everybody you know, follow-up with this one.

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