And here I didn't think Weezer could sink any lower.

The Dallas Mavericks traded for reigning NBA 6th Man Lamar Odom because they needed some veteran leadership off the bench, but mainly because they wanted to free up cap space to sign Deron Williams and possibly Dwight Howard. Well the space has been cleared, because Odom and the Mavs have broken up.

Cue the sad reality show music and Khloe Kardashian wiping her tears away with the money of lonely people.

“The Mavericks and I have mutually agreed that it’s in the best interest of both parties for me to step away from the team,” Odom said in a statement to ESPN.com. “I’m sorry that things didn’t work out better for both of us, but I wish the Mavs’ organization, my teammates and Dallas fans nothing but continued success in the defense of their championship.” (Via ESPN)

Odom will be listed as inactive for the rest of the season, which is a smart move for the Mavs, because they can still dangle his expiring contract as a trade piece in the offseason. Odom can be bought out for the very reasonable price of $2.4 million before June 29, which is quite the deal for teams looking to give away money.

Obviously no teams are going to be legitimately interested in a guy who only scored 6 points per game for the defending champs and was constantly distracted by his personal life that includes a reality show with his wife, who is a part of the world’s most fame-whoring family.

Then again, this guy still has a job, so anything is possible…

Read the rest of this entry »

It’s been a strange year for Lamar Odom, between being traded to the Dallas Mavericks after winning the NBA 6th Man award with the Los Angeles Lakers, being involved in an accident that resulted in a teenager’s death, coping with family illnesses, and, of course, his sex swing breaking. Making it all the more difficult is the fact that he has a camera in his face 24/7 for his reality show, Khloe & Lamar.

Well, now it appears that the camera, all of the added criticism and lack of privacy have taken their toll, and Odom wants to drop out of the reality TV lifestyle. “Haha, hilarious joke,” responded his wife.

“Lamar wants out of the reality TV limelight, but Khloe is convinced that if Lamar doesn’t continue being on TV with her, there would be NO Khloe,” a source told HollywoodLife. “The whole reason Khloe has become so popular is because of her marriage to Lamar. She obviously doesn’t want Lamar to be unhappy, but she knows that all the drama makes for good TV.”

According to the source, fame is Khloe’s first priority. “Same goes for Kim. Fame will always be more important than husbands and boyfriends,” said the insider. (Via the HuffPo)

Can we go ahead and award that “source” with the trophy for most obvious news of the year? What’s next, Kirstie Alley likes food and hates Xenu? #HOTTGOSS

I know I have this thing for the Kardashians, because I just love to make fun of them. But Odom, I like the guy. He seems pretty cool, like he and I could hang out and make fun of that guy he hangs out with who is Turtle from Entourage IRL. And he’ll probably be even cooler to hang out with once Khloe’s other sisters turn 18… hold on, someone’s at my door.

Oh hey, Chris Hansen, what’s up?

The Dallas Mavericks have assigned Lamar Odom to their D-League affiliate, the Texas Legends, on what’s being called a “rehab stint” to “get his legs back under him”. Some view the demotion as a way to remove Khloe Kardashian from the sports landscape like one might remove a clump of cat urine from a rancid litter box, while others see it as a pretty direct “go away forever for that thing you did with the sex swing“.

From Tracking:

Odom is expected to practice with the Texas Legends on Friday afternoon and play Saturday, at home against the Austin Toros. Meanwhile, the Mavs’ big club plays at New Orleans on Friday night. The team has already announced that Odom won’t make the trip.

Odom is in the twilight of his career and has been around the league for 12 years, so he’d be a great fit in Boston. He could end up being sent to Phoenix in exchange for Steve Nash (because Jason Kidd can’t be the wise old point guard forever), or maybe he’ll just get bought out by the Mavs and see how long the Kardashians keep him on their shows when his job is “ex-basketball star”.

Or, you know, best case scenario, he could use his time with the Legends to refocus his life, work on his game, get those legs under him and come back to the league a better, happier player. Yeah, that’s probably not going to happen.

A source told Jeff Caplan of ESPN Dallas that there’s “a growing feeling in the locker room that Odom might not return at all.”

That’s pretty conservative of them. I would’ve fired dude the second I found out he thought he could get into a sex swing with his underwear on.

A while back I thought it might be fun to watch Khloe & Lamar and recap it for our readers and after a whopping two episodes I gave up, because there was only so much I could take of scripted love and Lamar Odom’s best friend, Jamie Sangouthai, who it the real life Turtle from Entourage. You guys could have threatened my life for not providing recaps anymore and I would have just said, “Tough yeti titties.”

It’s also important to point out that I now try very hard to pretend that this show doesn’t exist, because I want the Kardashians to be concealed in ice and fired into the Marianas Trench, only to be sealed with an ancient Incan curse. But it’s futile, because every so often they do something that is either so insane or trashy and I just can’t ignore it. Enter: The Khloe and Lamar sex swing.

Khloe and Lamar are obviously very open about their sex life, and I can’t even describe how much that shrinks my stomach. Seriously, screw eating disorders. Just think about Khloe strapped into a swing, hanging from her ceiling while Lamar dances around in gym shorts as some sort of mating ritual. Having trouble picturing that?

Here. WATCH A VIDEO OF IT.

Read the rest of this entry »

When the Los Angeles Lakers traded Lamar Odom to the Dallas Mavericks for a trade exemption, three thoughts crossed my mind:

A) This is obviously a move to clear cap space for the Lakers to bring in Chris Paul and/or Dwight Howard.
2) The Kardashian family and the E! Network must be going absolutely ape sh*t over this news. After all, having Odom and Khloe Kardashian living and playing in L.A. made “Khloe & Lamar” all the more convenient.
III) You know who must love this? Mark Cuban.

That third point is the most important, because, after all, Cuban is a fame whore unlike any other, rivaled in the NBA owners circle only by the Miami Heat’s Mickey Arison, who #humblebrags on Twitter about driving around with Jimmy Buffett on New Year’s Eve and boasts about his latest vacations despite reportedly losing $1.3 billion last year.

Cuban obviously doesn’t love that his defending champions look slow and overwhelmed to start the season 3-4, and he especially can’t love watching Odom struggling to find his role on the team. But he must sure as hell love Kim Kardashian showing up to games to pick out her next $18 million man, like she did last night when her and Khloe feigned delight in signing things for their fans as they watched the Mavs beat the Phoenix Suns, 98-89.

Now, it’s not a certainty that the former Mrs. Humphries was shopping for man meat, but if she was, I’d actually sign off on a relationship with Shawn Marion, because that just seems like the perfect recipe for batsh*t crazy.

Khloe Kardashian is famous because her sister, Kim, made a sex tape with Brandy’s brother and her father helped O.J. Simpson get away with murder (allegedly). Then she became even more famous because she married Los Angeles Lakers forward Lamar Odom and America is full of idiots that like to watch talentless people in their everyday routines under the guise of reality programming. Thus, Lamar & Khloe debuted on the third horseman of the network apocalypse, E!, last night and I watched it so I could tell you all about how horrifying it was.

And it did not let me down. Some of the highlights include…

Read the rest of this entry »