First the sort-of-good news: Kim Kardashian and her cackling harpy sisters were informed by at least three exclusive neighborhoods in Miami over the past few weeks that they had no chance in hell of moving in for the filming of their next season of E!’s Kardashian Apocalypse, or whatever it’s called. But then, the bad news is that a neighborhood finally accepted them and they’re already making Miami an even less desirable place to live.

The interesting thing about that is that it means Khloe Kardashian-Odom will be all the way across the country from her husband and Los Angeles Clippers forward, Lamar Odom. Gee, I wonder if that will lead to any rumors about their relationship.

Khloe Kardashian was probably shocked to learn that she is the focus of a magazine cover story this week that claims her husband has visited a divorce lawyer to get out of the marriage while keeping his $67 million fortune. Khloe is now speaking out on the story, according to a new “Hollywood Life” report released on Oct. 17, and she is denying that her husband visited a divorce lawyer. (Via Examiner, which really loves using “In fact”)

Khlomar actually won’t be that far apart, as the Kris Jenner daughter that probably didn’t come from Robert Kardashian has signed on to judge The X Factor, because she obviously knows when someone is not talented. But that kind of reasoning won’t sell ad space, and it also won’t provide good drama for the Kardashians’ ridiculously scripted show.

So let’s turn up the rumor mill a little more with our very first edition of With Leather’s new gossip magazine, “On the Rag”. Check out this week’s cover after the jump…

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And here I didn't think Weezer could sink any lower.

The Dallas Mavericks traded for reigning NBA 6th Man Lamar Odom because they needed some veteran leadership off the bench, but mainly because they wanted to free up cap space to sign Deron Williams and possibly Dwight Howard. Well the space has been cleared, because Odom and the Mavs have broken up.

Cue the sad reality show music and Khloe Kardashian wiping her tears away with the money of lonely people.

“The Mavericks and I have mutually agreed that it’s in the best interest of both parties for me to step away from the team,” Odom said in a statement to ESPN.com. “I’m sorry that things didn’t work out better for both of us, but I wish the Mavs’ organization, my teammates and Dallas fans nothing but continued success in the defense of their championship.” (Via ESPN)

Odom will be listed as inactive for the rest of the season, which is a smart move for the Mavs, because they can still dangle his expiring contract as a trade piece in the offseason. Odom can be bought out for the very reasonable price of $2.4 million before June 29, which is quite the deal for teams looking to give away money.

Obviously no teams are going to be legitimately interested in a guy who only scored 6 points per game for the defending champs and was constantly distracted by his personal life that includes a reality show with his wife, who is a part of the world’s most fame-whoring family.

Then again, this guy still has a job, so anything is possible…

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It’s been a strange year for Lamar Odom, between being traded to the Dallas Mavericks after winning the NBA 6th Man award with the Los Angeles Lakers, being involved in an accident that resulted in a teenager’s death, coping with family illnesses, and, of course, his sex swing breaking. Making it all the more difficult is the fact that he has a camera in his face 24/7 for his reality show, Khloe & Lamar.

Well, now it appears that the camera, all of the added criticism and lack of privacy have taken their toll, and Odom wants to drop out of the reality TV lifestyle. “Haha, hilarious joke,” responded his wife.

“Lamar wants out of the reality TV limelight, but Khloe is convinced that if Lamar doesn’t continue being on TV with her, there would be NO Khloe,” a source told HollywoodLife. “The whole reason Khloe has become so popular is because of her marriage to Lamar. She obviously doesn’t want Lamar to be unhappy, but she knows that all the drama makes for good TV.”

According to the source, fame is Khloe’s first priority. “Same goes for Kim. Fame will always be more important than husbands and boyfriends,” said the insider. (Via the HuffPo)

Can we go ahead and award that “source” with the trophy for most obvious news of the year? What’s next, Kirstie Alley likes food and hates Xenu? #HOTTGOSS

I know I have this thing for the Kardashians, because I just love to make fun of them. But Odom, I like the guy. He seems pretty cool, like he and I could hang out and make fun of that guy he hangs out with who is Turtle from Entourage IRL. And he’ll probably be even cooler to hang out with once Khloe’s other sisters turn 18… hold on, someone’s at my door.

Oh hey, Chris Hansen, what’s up?

The Dallas Mavericks have assigned Lamar Odom to their D-League affiliate, the Texas Legends, on what’s being called a “rehab stint” to “get his legs back under him”. Some view the demotion as a way to remove Khloe Kardashian from the sports landscape like one might remove a clump of cat urine from a rancid litter box, while others see it as a pretty direct “go away forever for that thing you did with the sex swing“.

From Tracking:

Odom is expected to practice with the Texas Legends on Friday afternoon and play Saturday, at home against the Austin Toros. Meanwhile, the Mavs’ big club plays at New Orleans on Friday night. The team has already announced that Odom won’t make the trip.

Odom is in the twilight of his career and has been around the league for 12 years, so he’d be a great fit in Boston. He could end up being sent to Phoenix in exchange for Steve Nash (because Jason Kidd can’t be the wise old point guard forever), or maybe he’ll just get bought out by the Mavs and see how long the Kardashians keep him on their shows when his job is “ex-basketball star”.

Or, you know, best case scenario, he could use his time with the Legends to refocus his life, work on his game, get those legs under him and come back to the league a better, happier player. Yeah, that’s probably not going to happen.

A source told Jeff Caplan of ESPN Dallas that there’s “a growing feeling in the locker room that Odom might not return at all.”

That’s pretty conservative of them. I would’ve fired dude the second I found out he thought he could get into a sex swing with his underwear on.

A while back I thought it might be fun to watch Khloe & Lamar and recap it for our readers and after a whopping two episodes I gave up, because there was only so much I could take of scripted love and Lamar Odom’s best friend, Jamie Sangouthai, who it the real life Turtle from Entourage. You guys could have threatened my life for not providing recaps anymore and I would have just said, “Tough yeti titties.”

It’s also important to point out that I now try very hard to pretend that this show doesn’t exist, because I want the Kardashians to be concealed in ice and fired into the Marianas Trench, only to be sealed with an ancient Incan curse. But it’s futile, because every so often they do something that is either so insane or trashy and I just can’t ignore it. Enter: The Khloe and Lamar sex swing.

Khloe and Lamar are obviously very open about their sex life, and I can’t even describe how much that shrinks my stomach. Seriously, screw eating disorders. Just think about Khloe strapped into a swing, hanging from her ceiling while Lamar dances around in gym shorts as some sort of mating ritual. Having trouble picturing that?

Here. WATCH A VIDEO OF IT.

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It's a screen grab from the new Mavericks "Go Away Cam".

Dallas Mavericks forward Lamar Odom is not exactly having a good season, as the reigning NBA 6th Man is averaging just 6.8 points and 5 rebounds per game. The former Laker was of course sent to the Mavs in order for the Lakers to free up cash in case they traded for either Chris Paul or Dwight Howard, but now it just looks like they dumped him off for the sake of winning games.

To be fair, though, Odom had a hell of an offseason. Back in July, his 24-year old cousin was murdered and not even a week later he was involved in a car accident that killed a teenager. Factor in the NBA lockout and the guy might have just been a teeny weeny bit stressed out. Enough to make him want to take a year off from basketball to get his head in the right place.

Thankfully, his co-star, I mean wife, prevailed with the voice of reason.

“My wife talked me out of it.

“Cause I was asking myself: ‘Was I mentally prepared to play? If I didn’t play well, was I mentally prepared to help the team?’ I had thought, ‘Maybe I need a year.’ Because of the lockout, I thought, ‘Maybe somebody’s sending me a sign that I needed this time off.’

(Via ESPN)

That’s an incredibly fair assessment. I’m actually quite impressed with his ability to identify the needs of his personal well-being, as opposed to increasing his net worth, risking injury or being a detriment to his team.

“(But) when I told some of my friends and my family that I was thinking about steppin’ back for a minute, I think the reaction from the closest people to me kind of gave me the energy to get back at it.”

The closest people being his wife, of course, so forgive me if I now take his whole woe-is-me routine with a grain of salt. Look, I feel really bad for the guy. The death of a family member and then being involved with the death of a random stranger is just awful, and he’s also dealing with a pending lawsuit from a transgender club-goer claiming that Khloe and Lamar had someone beat her up at a nightclub a few months back. That’s a lot of stressful crap.

But his life is also staged for TV, so I see more than 50% of what he does as fake, and I’m probably being way too generous. Because he agreed to whore his life out in exchange for fake reality fame and his entire life is about making money, I refuse to believe that he was going to turn down $8.9 million for this season when he only has one more season left in his current deal. No way a team offers him this kind of money again. So good looking out, Khloe.

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