BILLS CUT KEVIN EVERETT FOR ‘SPINAL INJURY’

Written by Matt / 05.13.08

The Buffalo Bills waived tight end Kevin Everett today.  The former University of Miami standout, who has regained the ability to walk after a gruesome spinal cord injury on special teams last year, now has the opportunity to earn disability compensation from the NFL.

Everett may apply for a long-term disability payment of $224,000 per year over the life span of his injury, according to The Buffalo News, which first reported the roster move…

Everett received his full pay of $435,000 last season, his third in the NFL, qualifying him for a full NFL pension. Based on his number of years in the league, he is eligible to receive monthly payments of $1,410, the newspaper reported. Everett may also apply for a one-time payment of $75,000 as part of the Player Health Reimbursement Plan, according to the report…

"Today we are faced with the difficult decision to place Kevin on the waived/failed physical list, making him eligible to apply for any benefits due him," the team said. "We had numerous discussions with the league in dealing with this process to assist him in the best way possible. Kevin will always remain a Buffalo Bill in the same way that Jim Kelly, Thurman Thomas and so many others before him are held in the highest regard by our franchise."

His opportunity to make millions of dollars over a long career got cut short by a spinal injury that forced him how to learn how to walk again and will likely cause him freakish amounts of pain over the rest of his life.  If the Bills cared so fucking much about him, they'd give him a job in the organization.  But what do I know about caring for people who suffer life-altering injuries on the job?  I'm just a veteran decorated for leadership in combat.

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KEVIN EVERETT IS ON TV. KINDA.

Written by Matt / 09.28.07

Bills tight end Kevin Everett went from near-death paralysis to successful surgery to voluntary movement in his arms to… flailing around in a wheelchair?  What's next, is he gonna fly out of the hospital

Live news fuck-ups are my favorite fuck-ups.

[Food Court Lunch, Barstool Sports

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KEVIN EVERETT IS A REALLY FAST HEALER

Written by Matt / 09.12.07

A bunch of people must have prayed to Jesus and thanked Him for His amazing work on Kevin Everett, because FOXSports.com has the Bills' tight end listed as day-to-day. 

In case you're just hearing about this story now for the first time, Kevin Everett is the guy who broke his neck and had two vertebrae surgically removed on Sunday.  Doctors think that he'll walk again.  FOX thinks he'll see some action on Sunday.  But they also have Mike Utley listed as probable, so let's take this one with a grain of salt. 

Preferably bacon salt.  That stuff sounds delicious.

[SPORTSbyBROOKS

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WILL NO ONE THANK JESUS?

Written by Matt / 09.12.07

Count me in with the thousands of fans who are heartened by the surprising (miraculous?) news that Bills tight end/special teamer Kevin Everett is showing voluntary movement in his arms and legs, an indication that he has an excellent chance of walking again.  And all this is just a day after he had his third and fourth vertebrae removed in an operation that left doctors thinking he'd be paralyzed for life — if he survived at all.  It's really an amazing story.

But you know what I'm getting a little tired of?  All these "doctors" getting the credit.  "Well, we've done everything medical science has taught us, but it looks like he's never going to walk again."   The next day: "He's going to walk again!  Hooray brilliant doctors!"

Hooray doctors, my ass.  I'm pretty sure God didn't give doctors the power of miracles.  Only one guy gets miracle power besides Tom Brady, and that's the Son of God.  I better see some message board traffic thanking our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ for Kevin Everett's recovery, or I'm totally blaming Bills fans for next week's rain of flaming stones.

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