At some point during the chaos of the Miami Heat’s incredibly perseverant, come-from-behind 103-100 OT Game 6 victory over the San Antonio Spurs last night, something magical happened – LeBron James lost his trademark headband. Of course, people lost their sh*t over this, because the Internet is full of people who believe in superstition and mystical powers provided by fuzzy sweat-blockers that hide receding hairlines.

Needless to say, what quickly turned into the trending topic, #NoHeadband, became the easiest thing that sports media folks could run with until Game 7 begins tomorrow night, because why on Earth would we talk about things like how much Manu Ginobili is hurting the Spurs with his sloppy play or how Chris Bosh is playing in the face of immense criticism from the media and fans alike, when we could talk about whether or not one player should wear a headband?

Now, if I sound a little too cynical right now, it’s only because all of this #NoHeadband chatter is ignoring the fact that many great people throughout history had, in fact, only become famous and more successful once they shed their own trademark headbands. And I know this because I am a certified world historian with degrees from schools and places, and I can further verify by presenting these 100% accurate and legitimate photographs.

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Today is Kate Upton’s 21st birthday, and as such we would like to wish our favorite Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue cover model and reigning With Leather Celebrity Sports Fan of the Year (2010-probably when she turns, like, 34 or something) the best of birthday wishes. I also hope that she doesn’t go out and drink awful mixed shots until she throws up on an Applebee’s toilet seat like I did on my 21st birthday 13 years, I mean, three years ago.

And if she does go out to have some drinks on her birthday, maybe she’ll tell me where it is so I can totally not go there and stare at her like some crazy pervert wearing a top hat and holding an engagement ring. That would, haha, that would just be ridiculous.

Anywho, to honor our special lady, I slapped together this collection of my favorite 21 Kate Upton GIFs because she is wonderful and it’s Monday, so we should start off the week in style. Happy birthday, Kate.

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As you may know, Kate Upton’s big theatrical follow-up to Tower Heist and 30 seconds of The Three Stooges is a Cameron Diaz rom-com called The Other Woman, because, you know, they still make those. Here’s a clip of her almost falling out of her clothes filming a “ladies dance around a table” scene, because a shitty rom-com isn’t a shitty rom-com without a bunch of ladies dancing around a table!

(Nicki Minaj also stars in this, if you need an idea of how good it’ll be.)

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Links

What Are Timberlake, Jay-Z, Nas, And Timbaland Laughing About In This Mysterious Photo? |UPROXX|

This ‘Princess Bride’/’Game Of Thrones’ Mash-Up Is Perfect |Warming Glow|

Quirky Girl Crap I Am Sick Of, A Brief List |Film Drunk|

People Still Think This Picture Of Manu Ginobili With A ‘F*ck LeBron’ Sign Is Real |With Leather|

More Revealing Photos Tweeted From The ‘X-Men: Days Of Future Past’ Set |Gamma Squad|

Watch This News Reporter Make A Run For It When Pit Bulls Attack |Smoking Section|

The Definitive Post-Breakup Guide |Kissing Suzy Kolber|

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If you said anything other than “Kate Upton,” get the hell away from our website immediately.

Last year, right before Kate hit her first Sports Illustrated swimsuit cover and began an unstoppable media blitz involving ambassadorial trips to Mexico, denied sports romances and Bill O’Reilly outrage, Victoria’s Secret runway magnate Sophia Neophitou spoke out about how Kate was actually Kate Upton Plain And Tall, and not fit for the VS brand.

“We would never use Kate … She’s like a footballer’s wife, with the too-blond hair and that kind of face that anyone with enough money can go out and buy.”

The good news for fans of wonderfully-displayed underpants is that Victoria’s Secret does not necessarily the opinions expressed by Ms. Neophitou, and once again included Kate on the back cover of their catalog. The only problems are (1) the photo they used is super old, (2) they didn’t bring Kate back in to shoot any new stuff, and (3) they never told her they were going to use it.

The VS photos of Upton in a black bra surfaced yesterday, and buzz spread that the blond babe could be the next Angel, joining Adriana Lima and Alessandra Ambrosio.

But, “The pictures are from 2011,” sniffed a source. “Kate’s not currently contracted to work with Victoria’s Secret, and they didn’t contact her before they used these images.” (via Page Six)

So now we’re faced with a dilemma … do we enjoy the fact that Victoria’s Secret is using our (and America’s) favorite model despite the biased opinion of a person who works exclusively with waifish runway models, or do we get indignant because they infringed on Kate’s rights as a performer? While you mull that over, here are a few instances of Kate’s other appearances in the catalog. You know. To give you context.

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According to UK’s Metro, Kate Upton is the second hottest woman in the world, and that must be true because lists are legitimate ways of determining everything. Watch this: The World’s Most Handsome Man? Me. No. 2 is Brad Pitt. That can’t be argued because it’s a list, and so the world keeps spinning in this incredible Internet era.

The hottest woman in the world, according to Metro, is 25-year old Michelle Keegan, who I have never heard of before and in this photo she looks like Ashlee Simpson, so I just laughed and laughed. Anyway, there’s no need for Upton to be upset, because there’s one man out there who still thinks she’s special, and that’s none other than our favorite confused celebrity athlete – Ryan Lochte.

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Obviously, like a lot of American men between the ages of 13 and however old I am, I adore Kate Upton. But when my best friend RoboPanda (category: GammaSquad) sent me the above video of Upton in a Gillette ad, I wasn’t expecting that laugh. Is that her real laugh? Because, yikes.

Either way, congrats to Upton on Justin Verlander’s new MLB record payday. I can’t believe I’m saying this, but she better lock that down.

As for this weekend’s sports action, SPOILER ALERT: It’s all NCAA Tournament action. Even though Indiana destroyed my hopes last night. That’s important to note, because I’m the only person in America who picked Indiana to win it all. Crazy, right?

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