According to a report from Japan’s Yomiuri Giants, former Kansas City Royals pitcher Brian Bannister has responded to last month’s earthquake and tsunami by quitting his job, fleeing the country and quitting professional baseball forever. Apparently he left the country on March 16, and the team is just getting around to finding out about it now.

Bannister is ditching a one-year deal worth $1.8 million signed in January, which means (assuming he didn’t go to Japan until he signed that deal) he stuck it out for almost two months before he got the Fear of God put into him and threw in the towel. The guy is only 30 years old and isn’t especially worse than some of the lower-level starting pitchers still hanging around in the Majors, but he explicitly told Japanese baseball officials he “has no plans to play in either Japan or the United States.” He then added, “SUPER RUNAWAY” and ran off with his arms flailing in the air.

Brian Bannister spent five years in the Major Leagues, and will always be remembered for temporarily playing baseball.

[Japan Times]

Since it appears unclear that pitching ace Cliff Lee will pick his new team anytime soon, it’s worth noting on the last day of baseball’s winter meetings that Kansas City Royals pitcher Zach Greinke is being shopped by his team. Greinke’s stock has fallen slightly, but might find itself in the mix if the Yankees’ seven-year offer for Lee gets rejected.

Greinke, 27, slumped last season to 10-14 with a 4.17 ERA following his Cy Young-winning season in 2009. He is under contract for two more seasons at $13.5 million a year.

Royals officials readily acknowledge Greinke is only available at a steep price; they want two high-impact prospects – preferable a starting pitcher and a middle infielder or center fielder – and two prospects capable of playing a supporting role.

–KC Star.

Greinke’s qualified WHIP fell from first to 13th among AL starters (min. 200 IP), so he’s still a veritable bargain if he can be poached from a trade. Ah, those Royals. They’re like a farm team that plays against major league teams. I would know; I’m a Reds fan.

We’re now in the phase of the MLB season where the leagues glacially roll out their post-season awards; and we were moderately tickled to see Kansas City Royals ace and object of female WL readers’ affection Zack Greinke scoop up the AL Cy Young Award after one of the best seasons in baseball history. Greinke finished the season with 229-1/3 innings pitched, a 2.12 ERA and a pant-droppingly low 1.07 WHIP.

Greinke’s struggles with anxiety disorder are a part of his life and cost him most of two big-league seasons. But his poised brilliance on the mound conceals a young man who still isn’t terribly comfortable with all the recognition his talent has brought him. “He didn’t even answer the Cy Young call because he did not recognize the number on his cell phone,” the Kansas City Star’s Joe Posnanski writes. –The Daily Fix [Wall Street Journal]

Of course the nerds are rejoicing, as they feared that Greinke would lose the award to one of the six players that finished the season with more wins. They pointed to a stat called Fielding Independent Pitching (FIP), but really that sounds like a bunch of hogwash. Why use a bunch of statistics for such a thing when there are plenty of unbiased sportswriters at your disposal? Those guys are really knowledgeable and certainly would weigh each player’s performance equally. Especially when Greinke goes to play for the Yankees in 2011.

I gotta be honest, I haven’t been impressed with these auto-tune videos that seem to be coming out every week now. Oh, it’s a news clip made to sound like a bad Britney Spears song! Whatever, dude. I know you guys like them, and I’ll keep posting them for that reason, but this George Brett vid rises above the pack. But talking about soiling yourself in Vegas usually does. A little less defecation, a little more action, please. Thanks, Uff. via.

Zack Greinke, AKA The Only Reason To Give The Kansas City Royals Time Of Day, went eight innings in his latest start last night, which is like “balls and a half deep” by today’s standards. Most guys go five innings and they start looking into the dugout like some 9-year-old that got lost in a mall. Anyway, Greinke also struck out 15 batters as the Royals stopped a 5-game losing streak, 6-2.

“My plan was to get ahead with pitches, and once you get ahead, to finish it,” Greinke said.[...]

“I knew I had a bunch [of strikeouts] after two or three, but that happens a lot and I slow up big time, but I didn’t really think much of it until the fifth inning when there was 10, I think.”

Greinke’s ERA now sits at 2.43, best in the AL and third-best in the bigs behind Chris Carpenter and Matt Cain.

Elsewhere in baseball…The Rockies had another walkoff hit last night; this time it was the unflappable Troy Tulowitzki who singled in the bottom of the 10th to get past the Dodgers, 5-4. They Rockies are now only 2 games behind in the NL West to LA, whose lead in that division was allegedly insurmountable…The Over prevailed yet again for the Nationals; they scored six runs in the fifth of their tilt with the Cubs at Wrigley. Most of those runs were on Carlos Zambrano, who gave up eight runs but then got one back with a solo homer in the third. Washington prevailed, 15-6. Oh, and the Red Sox won, but screw them.

Here’s your baseball post for June: The Indians had the first walkoff seagull-poaching of 2009 after…if I can read the card here…Shin-Soo Choo hit a line drive in short center that bounced off a bird and eventually drove in the winning run. Cleveland tagged Kansas City Royals ace Zack Greinke (OMG! ZACK GREINKE!) for three earned runs, two of which were given up after Greinke left the game. His ERA has swelled to a portly 1.72 on the year, with grotesquely obese WHIP of 0.99. Disgusting.