Justin Bieber Can Probably Kick Your Ass

Written by Ashley Burns / 05.28.12

No idea which MLB team that hat is for, but I think it's the Reds.

Ever since Mike Tyson started his one-man show in Las Vegas, he ‘s become Mr. Name Dropper on Twitter with all of the new celebrity and Vegas “celebrity” friends that he’s made. In fact, his Instragram looks like the Who’s Who of “Who? Oh, that guy… meh”. But that all changed last week when Tyson was visited by some first class royalty, as the King-in-Waiting of Pop Music and dick-drawer extraordinaire Justin Bieber swung by his crib to take in a brief boxing lesson (video after the jump).

For starters, it’s nice to see that the Biebz is now hanging out with the Vegas crowd, because that always ends well, but I imagine this encounter went a little more like this:

Bieber (watching The Hangover with his enablers): “I want to do that! Let’s do that!”
Enabler: “What’s that, you want to go to Vegas?”
Bieber: “No, I want to steal Mike Tyson’s tiger. Let’s do that.”
Enabler: “But it’s an incredibly vicious animal!”
Bieber: *slaps him, throws money in the air*
Enabler: “I’ll pull the Lambo around.”
Bieber: “Selena, I’m going to Vegas. I’ll be back later and we’ll have a lot of sex.”
Selena Gomez: *reading 50 Shades of Grey* “Sure.”

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‘Call Me Brady’ Is The Song Of The NFL Summer

Written by Brandon Stroud / 05.17.12

call-me-brady-parodyThanks to an endorsement from Justin Bieber and a catchy hook straight out of Disney Channel primetime, ‘Canadian Idol’ third place finalist Carly Rae Jepsen has the “song of the summer” with Call Me Maybe. At the time of this posting, the video (featuring Carly being in love with her emo fitness model neighbor until he stops doing chores and tries to surprise buttsex a guy in her band) has almost 64 million views. And because in 2012 “you being famous” means “everyone who likes you also has to be famous”, YouTube has gotten clogged with at least 128 million Call Me Maybe covers and parodies.

This one comes to us from Zack Murray of North Andover, Massachusetts, a well-meaning kid with rosy cheeks and New England Patriots curtains. His version — “Call Me Brady”, about Pats QB Tom Brady and sadly neither Greg or Peter — is full of number identification and concerned eyebrows, but it’s just earnest (and thorough) enough to work. It’s one of those things you find that’s bound to go viral. And hey, bad signing or not it sounds like Steve f**king Wonder compared to the Texas Rangers Train people.

Maybe Bieber will give him a record contract, put him in videos with racially-indeterminate teen girls and market him to those 12-to-38-year-olds who can’t get enough of Ron Weasley.

[via Beantown Banter]

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The WithLeather Interactive Embarrassing Celebrity Baseball Fan Tracker

Written by Ashley Burns / 05.16.12

With the success of the first installment of the With Leather Awesome Celebrity Baseball Fan Tracker last week, I decided that we had to explore the darker side of famous fans. And hoo boy, are there some seriously embarrassing celebrity fans out there. But in fairness to the good fans out there, a lot of them – motions upward with eyes – are just fake fans, using our beloved national pastime as a chance to extend their 15 minutes a few more seconds.

As mentioned in the previous post – updated maps forthcoming – I don’t want the burden of being the ultimate deciding factor in putting together this thorough directory of which famous d-bags and dolts love which baseball teams. So I want you to make your recommendations in the comments for celebrities that I’ve missed, and I know that there are plenty.

But I also urge you to speak out in defense of any actor, musician, politician or generally famous person who I may have slighted by labeling an embarrassing fan. With the NBA and NHL playoffs ending in a few weeks – and they’re both already over for me – we’re in for a long summer. Let’s spend it creating productive dialog, shall we?

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Reason No. 365726 To Dislike Floyd Mayweather

Written by Ashley Burns / 05.07.12

On Saturday night, unparalleled loud mouth and cheap shot artist Floyd Mayweather, Jr. extended his career record to 43-0 after he defeated Miguel Cotto (37-3) by unanimous decision (118-110, 117-111, 117-111) at the MGM Grand in Las Vegas. Since I’m not much of a boxing guy – all my boxing is of the foxy variety – I had to depend on Twitter for fight analysis, and words used to describe Mayweather’s victory included surgical and diabolical, while I just saw things as punchy and huggy.

But the big difference between Mayweather and Cotto came before the fight even began, as the pugilists made their way to the ring with their respective entourages. Cotto came to the ring with his son, a respectable tribute to the inspiration he provides to his own flesh and blood. Mayweather, on the other hand, was joined by Lil Wayne, 50 Cent and… Justin Bieber?

Who says that boxing has forgotten the 13-year old female demographic?

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Who Ya Got: Satanic, Teleporting Frank McCourt Or Magic Johnson In A Top Hat?

Written by Brandon Stroud / 03.30.12

NMA should turn this into an ongoing series. I want to know what happened to the poor Dodgers fan who had a McCourt lurking in his bushes.

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The Animated GIF Bracket’s Final Four: Where Dreams And Nightmares Come True - YANKEE ENTHUSIASTS was robbed, that thing should win a Pulitzer. Please continue to vote MORTIFIED MICHIGAN PUNTER into the championship. [SB Nation]

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The 15 Greatest Knockouts in ‘The Ultimate Fighter’ History - Gifs of people being punched to death are a great way to start your Friday. Poor Solomon Hutcherson. [Cage Potato]

The South Park Memeing Episode: Instant Classic And KSK Relevant - Also, Everywhere Relevant. Here’s to hoping Faith Hilling doesn’t take off. [Kissing Suzy Kolber]

Conan’s Celebrity ‘Why Would You Tweet That?’ Bit Killed Last Night - Lenny Kravitz’s first love being “recording the same song over and over” is amazing. Maybe he’s like the lady from 50 First Dates. [UPROXX]

Two Boss Ways To Play Mario Kart - The day I was most jealous is when I found out the Cleveland Indians scoreboard guys played Madden on it. If I got to play Double Dash on that thing, I’d feel like God. [Gamma Squad]

Pranked Texas Granny Demands an Apology from Justin Bieber - Get in line, lady. [The FW]

Latest Entrant Into The Epic Drunk Hall Of Fame - A guy in a sombrero wears boxing gloves, jumps onto a cop car and shouts his name. Then he takes THIS mug shot. Worth your time. [Film Drunk]

Question Of The Day: Kidada Or Rashida Jones? - How is this even a question? What’s tomorrow’s question of the day, Alison Brie or the guy that plays Leonard? [Smoking Section]

Apparently Earth’s Mightiest Heroes Will Rock Out To Earth’s Crappiest Soundtrack - You sorta don’t expect it to be that bad when you read the headline, but holy sh*t, Papa Roach? In 2012? What is this, the WWE? [Pajiba]

Cats Vs. Dinosaurs - Technically don’t cats win for still being alive? [Buzzfeed]

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The Greatest Justin Bieber Photo Shoot Ever

Written by Ashley Burns / 03.20.12

I suppose if I had a pre-teen daughter – and I pray this is purely hypothetical – I could understand the anger that some dads would have toward Justin Bieber. After all, if I had to listen to “Baby Baby Baby” on repeat while being begged to go see Never Say Never, I’d have a stack of boarding school pamphlets on my desk for sure. But I don’t, so I don’t really have that much anger for Bieber, unless you count his “fashion” and then, yeah, my forehead vein will pop a little.

But Bieber also does a lot for charities, and that’s pretty cool. Plus, he already gave us one of the greatest GIFs of all-time:

And now he’s teamed up with Complex Magazine for a photo shoot that is probably going to please the majority of guys aged 18-34. Bieber and photographer Tony Kelly created a boxing-inspired shoot that pretty much shows us what it would look like if the Biebs got his ass pummeled.

I think this more than makes up for the lack of boxing posts around here.

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