Just a few nights removed from barfing on stage, Canadian pop superstar Justin Bieber performed the show of a lifetime at the Staples Center Monday night. I know that because I looked at his Twitter feed and he’s been retweeting everyone who has Tweeted that his show was great and, according to some, propelled his swag to new heights. If only that swag would run out of fuel and plummet to the ground.

This morning, though, Bieber Tweeted a video that followed up a Tweet from last week that confirmed that the MVP of the NBA All-Star Weekend celebrity game – I think, who even remembers? – is available in NBA 2K13, which hit stores yesterday. I’d make fun of this, but he’s instantly an upgrade to the Orlando Magic roster.

The video is… less than flattering, as it shows Bieber being rejected and turning the ball over, before getting frustrated and throwing his arms up in the air. Interestingly, he is, in fact, waving them like does care. But please don’t feel bad for the Biebs, because as YouTube commenter DiaperBoy1996 points out, Justin is awesome at everything.

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Last we checked in on Canadian pop superstar Justin Bieber, he was skating with the Toronto Maple Leafs as part of the Children’s Wish Foundation of Canada’s efforts to make a young girl’s dream come true, before he headed off to hand out food at the Daily Bread Food Bank. After all of that, he recorded a Christmas special for a Canadian TV station, and everyone was all, “Aw what a good kid who has more money than most African nations.”

So of course he deserved to take a little time off last night and have some fun at a Toronto Raptors game – as he was still in town after his grandparents were in a serious car accident. But those darn Raptors had to spoil the fun by sucking losing to the Indiana Pacers, 90-85.

However, the news isn’t that Bieber was at a game or that he wears his pants halfway down his ass like a schmuck. Nope, the tabloids are going crazy today because someone took a picture of J-Biebz looking in the general direction of the attractive female Raptors dancers. WHAT WILL SELENA GOMEZ THINK? OH THE HUMANITY! WHERE IS OUR GOD NOW? THE WORLD IS ENDING!

I need more coffee.

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Why, they have all attended the NBA Finals, of course! Originally, this post was titled, “Hey, Did Kelly Clarkson Get Hot Again?” but then I saw a story in the Dallas Voice about the Westboro Baptist protesting the NBA Finals in Dallas because the NBA had the nerve to fine Kobe Bryant and Joakim Noah for using “f*ggot” as an insult in two different games this season, and I wanted to point out that the WBC seriously sucks.

From the WBC’s batsh*t crazy ramblings press release:

WBC will picket the NBA game between the Dallas Mavericks and the Miami Heat to warn this nation that they need to tear down their idols and worship only the true God, Jesus Christ. The people of Doomed america set up these spoiled, rebellious basketball players and other celebrities as little gods that they emulate then curse the real God, Jesus Christ because He does not supprt their vile sins.

Of course I didn’t edit that for them, they’ll learn to spell when they get to the third grade. I’m mostly upset that their presence briefly took my attention away from the lack of star power at this year’s Finals. Granted Justin Bieber and Lil Wayne pack some major celeb cred, but ABC hasn’t even been filling the stands with the cast of Rookie Blue. The least they could do is put Sofia Vergara and Julie Bowen courtside and maybe have them pudding wrestle Elisha Cuthbert. It’s called marketing, damn it.

Regardless, there have been a few famous faces in the crowd, so we should enjoy what we have.

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