The annual Gathering of the Juggalos event in Illinois is a fascinating spectacle. While the Insane Clown Posse’s Violent J and Shaggy 2 Dope have led us to believe that they’re a pair of thugged out, gun-wielding psychos, it turns out that they’re actually two devout Christians trying to spread positive influence through their unique brand of rap music. Of course, their followers, Juggalos, end up interpreting that message in their own way, like domestic violence turkey legs, black market Four Loko, or blatantly selling LSD.

But the Gathering has also been a source of inspiration for a different demographic, namely celebrities at the end of their 15 minutes. Each year, the festival’s organizers release an infomercial to fill us in on the lineup, and there are always a few random celebrities that are begging for one last shred of acceptance. See: Charlie Sheen, MC Hammer, Tom Green, Gallagher, Coolio, Dustin Diamond, Vanilla Ice, Ron Jeremy, and, of course, Tila Tequila, who famously walked around topless during her electro-pop-garbage music performance that inspired the crowd to throw bottles, rocks, and poop at her face.

So who are this year’s Juggalo stars?

Master P, Onyx, The Fat Boys, Bobcat Goldthwait, Jamie Kennedy, and fresh off his release from TNA Wrestling and a domestic dispute, Ric Flair. I guess in order to be the best, you have to now throw feces at the best. Enjoy the 2012 Gathering infomercial after the jump.

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Yes, that’s Real Madrid goalkeeper Iker Casillas picking his nose and wiping it on a child’s face. It’s the acting out of how Jose Canseco treated me when I tried to get his autograph when I was 7. (Via Sportress.)

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Links

A Day In The Life Of DJ Wally Sparks |Smoking Section|

5 Reasons “Game of Thrones” is Way Better As a TV Show |Gamma Squad|

The Best Of #Titanic Lulz |UPROXX|

Wawtch Mahky Mahk pahty with a fackin teddy beah |Film Drunk|

WWE Raw Open Discussion Thread 4/2/12: The Beginning Of A New, Not Entirely Dissimilar Era |With Leather|

‘Game of Thrones’ Recap: ‘The North Remembers’ |Warming Glow|

Dogs That Look Like ‘Mad Men’ Characters |Warming Glow|

Mad Men Discussion: Fat Betty Draper Francis Is FAT FAT FAT |UPROXX|

Tracy Morgan Explains Twitter |UPROXX|

On Marvin Gaye, The Pressures Of Fame And Why Sex Is Better Than Love |Smoking Section|

Probably the best Juggalo freestyle of all time |Film Drunk|

The Greatest Tire Cover In The World |With Leather|

Nic Cage Is All The Avengers (Plus TV Spots) |Gamma Squad|

Chevy Chase Calls Dan Harmon a ‘Fat Sh*t,’ Might Leave ‘Community’ |Warming Glow|

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Links

‘There is No Bigatory in Juggaloism’: Pictures & Quotes from American Juggalo - Juggalos should be a reminder to white people that they should 1) not smoke, 2) lead a healthy lifestyle, 3) not take advantage of poor women with no self-esteem. [Film Drunk]

Colbert Had Hipster Paramedics Standing By ‘In The Event Any Radiohead Heads Totally Lose Their Sh*t’ - There is a dangerous use of the word “hipster” in today’s Morning Links. Do hipsters like Radiohead? More importantly, do hipsters like things? [UPROXX]

5 Best Uses of Radiohead in Film - Sadly “that scene I wrote in my book so that I could use ‘Street Spirit’ in the movie adaptation” is not on the list. Scott Tenorman is still the best use of Radiohead in something, including Radiohead concerts. [Moviefone]

ACW Evolution Of The Revolutinon V - I missed Anarchy Championship Wrestling’s last show when I was in Los Angeles, but Dirty Dirty Sheets recaps it and makes me feel like I was there. Fans are being encouraged to wear HALLOWEEN COSTUMES to their next show, so if you live anywhere near central Texas, holy sh*t, be there. [Dirty Dirty Sheets]

WTF, Japan? - Japanese people reenact the opening scenes of the Pokémon game using bad costumes, bad editing and buckets of water. Charizard Guy is the saddest. [Gamma Squad]

God Smites Earth with Nancy Grace Nip Slip - Dowdy, thick middle-aged conservative nutcases #cangetit [Warming Glow]

Top 10 Pictures Of Justin Bieber Looking Like A Hipster Douche - Again, I don’t think Bieber looks like a hipster douche, I just think he looks like an idiot. He’s also the reason why every child dresses and acts like this now, so he’s not “hipster”, he’s totally and completely the social norm. [Buzzfeed]

‘Drive’ Set to Sh*tty Music - Funnier than it should be. The only thing it needs is a record scratch. [Film Drunk]

Irish Farmer Shocked by Rihanna’s Toplessness - I feel like Rihanna needs to spend more time with actual human beings. Like, take a year or two off, go work at a soup kitchen. And stop trying to finger yourself through your clothes. [FARK]

Is ‘The Playboy Club’ or ‘Pan Am’ More Accurate? - No. [AOL TV]

Ice Cream Shop Mascot Repeatedly Mistaken for KKK Member - I need to get a picture with this guy. I already have pictures with KKK members, it’s called my family photo album. [The Daily What]

How to Make Your Own Chewbacca Suit - 1) Kill as many dogs as possible, 2) lay down a sheet of glue, 3) roll around. [Unreality]

With Leather

Brock Lesnar Murdering Things - I learned to love him as Paul Heyman’s cocky frat supermonster, I learned to love him as a faux-Minnesota Viking and now I must learn to love him again as a guy who systematically does everything I don’t like. I bet he thinks “Scrubs” is the funniest show ever. Ugh, come on, Brock. [With Leather]

And You Guys Thought Kate Upton Was Fat - About halfway through I thought to myself “okay, she shouldn’t be a minstrel for fat people but at least she’s smiling, whatever makes her happy, I guess” and then I got to the nearly-naked photos. When your body starts to look like a snow-fallen tree you should reevaluate your life. [With Leather]

UA Panhellenic Board Recruitment Video 2011 - I’m proud to say this post got its first “you don’t like this because you’re JEALOUS” comment last night, and I wanted to go ahead and share that with everybody. Update for that commenter: When I was in college I wanted to sleep with the hot artsy college girls, not these high school leftovers. [With Leather]

The Dugout: Thome at 600 - Any chance Thome’s career gets a second wind, and he hits like .320 next season and gives us a reason to think he’ll make it to 700? Because that would be awesome. I really want to write “Jim Thome at 800″, while we’re at it. [With Leather]

Elsewhere On Uproxx

Suge Knight Disses Diddy…in 2011 - Sort of like the Hulk Hogan vs. Ultimate Warrior of rap music. You would’ve wanted to see it decades ago, but even then you didn’t really take them seriously. [Smoking Section]

Frotcast 61: Punte, Clips from Vince’s Stand Up Comedy, The Val Kilmer Song Title Game - I’m doing the test run of my podcast tonight! Yeahhh! While I’m doing that, please enjoy professionals who know how to do it and don’t have to stare at a microphone for two weeks beforehand. [Film Drunk]

Justin Bieber’s Concert in Mexico Sells Out, Fans Lose Their Sh*t - Idol worship is pretty awesome. Bieber should start trying to heal people. Touch them in the forehead, make them fall down, that kind of thing. Worst case scenario, he should talk more about Jesus. [Warming Glow]

The Amazing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle Art of David Rapoza - I would pay good money for a cartoon that looked like this. Come for the April O’Neil, stay for f**king Wingnut and Screwloose. [Gamma Squad]

Not Sports

17 Promising Actors Who Never Lived Up to Their Potential - I don’t know why Elisha Cuthbert is on this list. Sure, she was pretty gorgeous at one point, but anybody who watched “24″ knows her potential was “show nipples”. Actual recommendation for the list: Thora Birch. Where the hell are you, Thora? [Pajiba]

89 Things I Learned at the Gathering of the Juggalos - I like that ICP brings in black celebrities to make their racist county fair look multicultural. Guess what? Racist white people LOVE black celebrities, they just hate the black people they see every day. And Obama. [Buzzfeed]

The 30 Harshest Musician on Musician Insults - I hope Eminem’s “nobody listens to Techno!” to Moby made the list. No I don’t, that was the weakest thing ever. 15 years later there are 38 techno songs on the American top 40. The only rapper on the list is Lil Wayne, and he’s singing a tender ballad. [FARK]

The Hottest New Action Stars of 2011 - I saw The Help last night, so I want to nominate Viola Davis for this. Watch her run. That sh*t is TENSE. Best scared woman run since Judy Garland. [Moviefone]

The Arizona Diamondbacks let Charlie Sheen take batting practice prior to yesterday’s 5-3 win over the New York Mets, and while it’s bad enough that people continue to pay attention to his depressing antics, the reason that he was there is even worse – he’s trying to get into shape for Major League 4. And this isn’t one of those “I’m getting a show on HBO” rumors that he likes to make up. This is for real.

I had heard this rumor earlier in the year – that Sheen, Corbin Bernsen and even Wesley “I was too good for Major League 2 but Lord knows I need the money now” Snipes were on board for another installment, and even the first film’s writer and director, David S. Ward, was down. Apparently the plot will involve the Cleveland Indians signing a washed up, burn out Rick Vaughn to mentor a wild rookie, who may or may not be Wild Thing’s son. The only potential in this idea is to show Willie Mays Hayes as a universally-loathed HGH addict in denial. Other than that, no. Just no.

Even the gods have stepped in and showed their disapproval, as Sheen ruptured the ulnar nerve in his elbow during batting practice. And if that isn’t bad enough, even Juggalos hate Sheen. Seriously. Juggalos.

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