NBA 6th Man of the Year JR Smith said that if he hadn’t been suspended for Game 4 of the first round of the New York Knicks playoff matchup against the Boston Celtics, he’d be playing golf right now. That’s because the Knicks would have swept the Celtics, you see, but since he wasn’t there to hit a few shots and dance like a wild man in front of Louis CK, Boston won Game 4.

So it should have been over last night with Smith back for Game 5, right? WRONG, YOU FOOLS! The Celtics absolutely stymied the Knicks on defense, making Smith and NBA scoring leader Carmelo Anthony look downright foolish at times in a 92-86 victory that was not nearly as close as the score suggests.

Now, with the Celtics within one game of forcing this series to go the distance, you can imagine that things might be getting a little heated between these two bitter rivals. And it is, because sports are awesome.

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By now, we all know that Tim Tebow was unceremoniously released by the New York Jets after what can best be described as one pooptastic season with the team. Tebow barely saw the field for anything other than punt protection, and the infamous New York sports media routinely gave him the business, as if he were the sole problem with the franchise.

However, lost in the debate as to whether or not the Jets made the right decision or if they did it with class that a gentleman like Tebow deserves is what truly mattered most – Tebow never claimed his free lap dance at Rick’s Cabaret. Obviously, our friends at Rick’s are quite bummed about this, but they’re still most concerned with Tebow’s future.

They are truly the most considerate women that I have ever known.

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I think we all need to take a seat, maybe form a circle and just relax for a few minutes. We get a little bit too crazy about sports sometimes, and we tend to overreact toward athletes and media analysts for their decisions and/or opinions. I mean, take Twitter, for example. Have you seen the horrible verbal venom that is spewed at famous people on that “social media” site on a daily basis? Hell, I’m as guilty as the next guy for making cracks at some athletes, but I’m talking about the violent threats.

It’s really getting out of hand, and it’s been spilling out into our stadiums and arenas now, ruining the idea of fun competition for everyone. What the hell’s the point of going to a game or a bar these days if you constantly have to look over your shoulder and wonder if someone is about to stab you? Sports are supposed to take our minds off the really sh*tty things in life and provide hope and inspiration. Instead, we have people slaughtering each other in the streets.

Everybody calm down and let’s remember why we’re here in the first place… to hope that the other team loses and pray for people to be fired. That’s what sports are all about, dang it.

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I took a couple weeks off from doing these here ROFLMNBAO posts for two reasons: 1) because the last two weeks of the season were soooooo boring and B) I forgot. But I figured what better time than now to resume posting these NBA meme pictures since the news that they’re so in demand. Form a line to the left, attractive girls who want to give me money to create ridiculously corny-sounding sites!

Also, I figured it was a better time than any for this week’s installment with the playoffs in full swing and individual awards being presented by the league. As we already know, Tyson Chandler is the Defensive Player of the Year, Jason Kidd received the Sportsmanship Award and Gregg Popovich is the Coach of the Year. “What about the other awards?” you ask while peeling apart the pages of my vintage Hustler collection. The NBA is taking its sweet ass time with those, so I’m issuing my own awards.

A lot happened in this condensed season, so it’s only fair that we recognize everyone for their efforts.

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With a 1.5 game lead over the Milwaukee Bucks for the 8th playoff spot in the East, it seems like the New York Knicks are in good position to at least make the playoffs. They’re still sitting at .500 (27-27) as they have been for most of the season, and even the energy of a new coach and system isn’t helping them get over the hump and back into serious contention, despite some analysts who have the Knicks pegged as a title contender hiding in the best spot possible. Because any team, regardless of talent level, really wants to play the No. 1 seed in the first round of the playoffs.

But over in China, an old Knick is proving that he had some gas left in the tank to get himself a championship. Stephon Marbury and the Beijing Ducks – mmmmmmmm, Beijing duck – are the new Chinese Basketball Association champions, after Starbury scored 41 points in Game 5 to oust the defending champions, Guangdong Hongyuan. Marbury also scored 52 points in Game 2 and 53 points in Game 3, so if you were wondering how the New York sports media would pass the time with Jeremy Lin out for the season… stop.

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