Dear. God. I mean, I dig the song, “Tangled Up In Plaid” by QOTSA, but this is ridiculous. You know, come to think of it, “BRayser,” which Tampa Bay Rays manager Joe Maddon coined to provide a name to these horrific atrocities, is perhaps the only term in the so-called MLB Fashion Lexicon, which I guess you could say is a good thing. Keep yer hoity-toity world of fashion out of my baseball, daggummit! Der takin’ Southeast Asian child laborers’ jerbs!

Manager Joe Maddon boasted Monday about the team’s custom-designed BRayser (that’s Rays and blazer, get it?) that will be mandatory dress on the upcoming West Coast road trip. “They’re fabulous,” he said. “They met with everybody’s approval.” Local fashion designer Julia Alarcon did the creative work, with Rays TV man Todd Kalas coordinating the months-long project. via.

Ha. BRayser. I guess this sort of shortsighted style scheme should come as no surprise coming from Maddon. He is, of course, the same fifty-something who dyed his hair black back in 2009 to “lighten the mood” in the clubhouse. Nevertheless, despite his previous fashion risks, I have to give a thumbs down to this garish exercise in plaid. It looks like the mutated offspring that would be born if Craig Sager could somehow figure out a way to impregnate my grandma’s couch.

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BJ Upton did his best Scrappy Doo impression after teammate Evan Longoria got all up in his grill. Longoria felt that Upton didn’t give 110% when going after center field drive in yesterday’s 2-1 loss to the Diamondbacks. I haven’t seen an argument so heated since me and my buddy debated whether Wendy’s or McDonald’s had the better dollar menu. Obviously, it’s Wendy’s.

Rays center fielder B.J. Upton and All-Star third baseman Evan Longoria nearly came to blows in the dugout today after Longoria took Upton to task for pursuing a ball in what Longoria felt was a cavalier fashion.

After Arizona’s Rusty Ryal hit a ball into the gap between left and center field in the top of the fifth inning, Upton appeared to pursue it at less than full speed. Ryal motored to third for a triple, a key base to attain with just one out. Gerardo Parra rendered that somewhat moot by following with a two-run home run to provide the winning margin.

Between innings, Longoria approached Upton about the play and the two had several verbal exchanges. Teammates had to restrain Upton after Longoria walked away. –USAToday

Rays manager Joe Maddon said that Longoria’s actions represented a feeling that was shared with his teammates. The two must have had a pretty serious heart to heart, as both have said that beef has been squashed. The Rays HR department had Dick Vitale arbitrate the conflict resolution. “You guys are both awesome with a capital A! Let’s all be PTP-ers and have a calm discussion where we talk about our feelings! Evan, how did BJ’s play make you feel?” They should send Dickey V to the West Bank to find a peaceful resolution to that crisis. Video after the jump. Read the rest of this entry »

Tampa Bay Rays manager Joe Maddon is known for his meticulous managing style, or for being an over-managing douchebag, depending on whose cap you’re wearing, which makes this gaffe from Sunday’s game against the Cleveland Indians all the more remarkable. Maddon penciled in two players at third base–Ben Zobrist and Evan Longoria, the latter whom Maddon had intended to play as the DH. From the Tampa Trib:

Because Zobrist had already played, the Rays had to forfeit the DH slot and have the pitcher bat in what would have been Longoria’s slot – third in the batting order.

So Andy Sonnanstine, who loves hitting more than any other Rays pitcher, ended up batting third when play resumed in the bottom of the first inning – and promptly knocked Carl Crawford off the bases with an ineffective bunt down the third-base line that got Crawford forced out at second base.

However, Sonnanstine did hit an RBI double in the fourth. And the Rays won the game. But still, that’s quite a boner on Joe Maddon’s part. And a pretty big lineup card mistake to boot.

|Roto Arcade|

Craid Sager’s sex appeal is so massive and sprawling that all in his wake are unable to control their desires.  Watch as Rays manager Joe Maddon is caught in the glory of Sager’s velvet blazer and — unable to hold back — blows the sideline reporter a kiss.

On a side note, I’ve heard that the “velvet blazer” is one of Sager’s moves in the bedroom.  Heard second-hand, of course.  I’m not his type :(

[Sox and Dawgs]