I thought he was just a cereal box model, but apparently Jeff Gordon is a champion race car driver and B-Boy.

The breaking of dance occurred during the NASCAR “After the Lap” event in Las Vegas, a championship banquet referred to by the Las Vegas Sun as a “press conference on steroids” that plays out like the last 30 minutes of any Blue Collar Comedy Tour stop, right down having Bill Engvall sit there squinting and laughing while people around him try to be entertaining. The skinny (and white) from SB Nation:

Gordon said he started break-dancing in middle school because that’s what all the cool kids did. In fact, the four-time NASCAR champ said he’d sneak into the bathroom and break-dance every morning before school, because they weren’t allowed to dance in the hallways.

You can check out video of the hip-hoppery after the jump, but be aware that at no point during the clip does he accidentally kick Bill Engvall in the face.

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Jimmie Johnson’s Chase for the Sprint Cup isn’t going so well, but at least he’s passing and defeating Jimmy Fallon in a game of Jimmie Johnson’s Anything With An Engine on ‘Late Night With Jimmy Fallon’ this week. Anything features the same outlandish action you’d except from a seventh place finish in the Sprint Cup Series and all the overt stereotyping you’d expect from a NASCAR audience, including characters like motorized-toilet-riding sumo wrestler “Gotta Go San”.

Fallon is actually a downloadable character in the game, and hopefully if you press X enough times he stops racing and just stands there snickering to himself while everyone else finishes. Reviews of the game (which was released on Tuesday) call it fun and addictive, and no, I haven’t played it, so I guess biggest problem with it and with Fallon in the clip is the phrase, “it’s like Mario Kart for adults”. You know what else is like Mario Kart for adults? Mario Kart. I’ve had more adult fun playing Mario Kart Double Dash!! than I’ve had watching NASCAR, much less playing a NASCAR-guy-endorsed PS1 port of Wacky Wheels.

You can check out the clip from the Let’s Play archives after the jump, courtesy of From The Marbles.

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The greatest dynasty in pro sports right now is one that most sports fans could care less about. That would be the dynasty of the Hendrick Motorsports No. 48 Chevy Monte Carlo, fronted by California native Jimmie Kenneth Johnson. It’s a name so white you could spread peanut butter on it.

Johnson won his fourth consecutive NASCAR Sprint Cup Series title yesterday, and if it were not for ESPN’s deal with NASCAR, it’s fair to say that most of us would be totally unaware of it. Between an above-average NFL Sunday and the AMAs last night, Johnson’s achievement was the veritable tree falling in an empty forest. No driver has ever won four straight titles at that level. It’s only happened a couple times in other sports. But NASCAR doesn’t have its finger on the pulse of the sporting world as some other leagues do.

The worst thing of all of this is that Jimmie’s achievement will do almost nothing to bring new fans to NASCAR. Where’s the trendy jeans commercials? Where’s the fistfighting in pit row? This guy, as great as he is, is boring. And though four straight cups might be impressive, and it is, its significance in sport isn’t nearly as grand as its inconceivability.

ASYLUM POLL: How big a sports star is Jimmie Johnson?

Note to Sprint: yes to corporate bikinis, no to corporate firesuits

So… yeah.  I’ve gotten so used to not covering NASCAR that I didn’t spend a single word on Jimmie Johnson’s third consecutive Sprint Cup victory.  He’s the only driver to win three straight Sprint Cups, although noted badass Cale Yarborough once won three straight Winston Cups, and I’m told that’s the same thing, even if you can’t smoke cellular phone service.  Believe me, I’ve tried.

Anyway, I can see people are getting upset because stock cars aren’t hybrids, so we’ll just go to the video.  After the jump, Jimmie reacts to a commentator asking him how he’s going to get it up.  Er, next year!  Wait, that came out wrong. He just wants to know about your erection — DAMMIT!

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won his second consecutive Nextel Cup NASCAR award thingy.  Prior to finishing seventh in yesterday's race at Homestead, Johnson had won four straight Chase races to all but seal the championship, a feat made even more impressive by the way Jeff Gordon drove this season.

Gordon, who finished second in the standings, won six races this year and set a NASCAR record with 30 top-10 finishes.  He also impregnated model Ingrid Vandebosch, who gave birth to his progeny.  Not bad for second place.

NASCAR has by far and away the shortest offseason of any sport, if you're one of those people who consider driving a sport.  I think the new season starts next week, actually.

In light of Jimmie Johnson's broken wrist that resulted in him joyriding on top of a golf cart, FOXsports.com ranks the Top Five Most Bizarre NASCAR injuries, and #1 is a doozy. Readers, meet Cale Yarborough.

Throughout Yarborough's life, the three-time Cup champ has been bitten by a rattlesnake, struck by lightning, shot, and nearly attacked by his pet bear while flying an airplane…

Okay, the pet bear I can understand. Badasses like me and Cale often keep one for sparring. But what's it doing in the plane? Serving drinks?

But the single greatest and most bizarre NASCAR Injury happened in Jacksonville, Fla. in 1958. Yarborough was working with a traveling air show as a skydiver and leaped from a plane at 5,000 feet. At 2,000 feet he pulled the rip cord … and nothing happened. He pulled again … still nothing. At about 200 feet above the Earth, the chute weakly rolled out, providing a minimal amount of drag to slow him down. "Lucky for me, I landed on a patch of high grass and mud, which gave me a little bit of a cushion. I walked away with a chipped elbow."

My God, this man is like Bill Brasky and Rasputin rolled into one. NASCAR drivers just aren't as tough as they used to be.