If you frequent FilmDrunk (and you do, obviously), you’re familiar with the outstanding hype and mildly-enjoyable execution of Harmony Korine’s Spring Breakers, the story of what happens when you ask James Franco and a bunch of girls from the Disney Channel to remake Kids without telling them what Kids is about. It gave us months of gratuitous Selena Gomez crotch shots, discussions about MTV Riff Raff and totally reasonable character posters.

Finally, as if given to me by the Lord himself, there is a sports-themed Spring Breakers parody.

Here’s Final Fourers, the gritty reimagining that replaces Spring Break with the NCAA Tournament, replaces beautiful Disney teens with comedians, and replaces James Franco with … well, I’m pretty sure that’s still James Franco. The highly anticipated trailer is after the jump. I can’t wait until the red band version, where they can show Kevin Ware’s leg being broken.

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This week, Sports On TV looks at the greatest sports moments from one of the greatest shows ever made — Paul Feig and Judd Apatow’s classic 1999 series ‘Freaks and Geeks,’ about a group of kids trying to navigate high school in 1980s Michigan.

The show only aired for 12 episodes and only 18 were made, but anyone who has seen it can attest to its greatness. It features an incredible cast full of people you love from SOMEWHERE (be it Martin Starr and Lizzy Caplan for their killer turns on ‘Party Down,’ Linda Cardellini for being Velma in the Scooby-Doo movies or a doctor on ‘ER,’ Jason Segel for reviving the Muppets and forgetting Sarah Marshall, and on and on), some of the best music of all time, beautiful photography, writing that stays with you 14 years later … everything you could ask for in a television show. Also, sports.

So please enjoy the 10 greatest sports moments from ‘Freaks and Geeks.’ In a better world, we’d have enough episodes to do 25.

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Links

Direct Messaging For UPROXX Commenters Is Here! - I’m still not 100% on why this is necessary, but hey, new feature! [UPROXX]

The Best Of #Troy And Abed - Cool. Cool cool cool. [UPROXX]

Re-Take: 25 Celebs Playboy Should Have Spent A Million Bucks On - Some of these are great, but come on, Christina Hendricks? She’s pretty, but the Playboy Photoshoppers would break their hands. [Smoking Section]

If Your 5 Favorite Memes Offered Online Degrees - None of these are as funny as the Education Connection Girl. “I WENT on the inter-NET!” Fantasy threesome: me, Flo from Progressive, the Education Connection lady. [Gamma Squad]

James Franco Reviewed Twilight - So did I. “Twilight is terrible, everybody knows that, right? Okay, the end.” [Film Drunk]

Game of Thrones Teaser Trailer: Needs More Tyrion Bitch-Slapping Joffrey - I was going to watch season one of ‘Game Of Thrones’, but then I took an arrow in the knee. [Warming Glow]

This Jim Henson Tribute Art Show Rainbow Connects With Our Hearts - Argh, my heart. Seriously, even pictures of Jim Henson make me want to burst into tears now. [UPROXX]

The Best And Horrifically Worst Of The 2011 Air Sex World Championships - In case you missed it yesterday, here are a few of the bravest people in Texas making love to ghosts. [With Leather]

Plastic Bag Turns Boring TV Interview Into Must-See TV - This is the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. [The FW]

Friendly Waving Bear Is Friendly, Waving - I don’t know if Reddit knows it or not, but YouTube is FULL of videos of bears waving. I’m surprised this isn’t a thing already. [High Definite]

Game Over: The Greatest Video Game Maneuver Ever Accomplished - Like every story you’ve heard someone tell a cashier at Gamestop come to life. Let’s get the Mythbusters or whoever to see if somebody could do this in real life. [Unreality]

25 Things You Didn’t Know About Three Amigos - haha I didn’t know there were 25 THINGS about Three Amigos. [Moviefone]

The 10 Most Bad Ass Movie Posters of 2011 - Somehow “Harry Potter looking at Voldemort” got called “bad ass”. We have weird standards. [Pajiba]

"Don't do it, broseph."

Providing further evidence that hiking serves no purpose, 64-year old Amos Wayne Richards picked up a copy of 127 Hours recently, and James Franco’s gritty performance totally inspired him. The film, of course, tells the story of hiker Aron Ralston, who decided to go hiking in Utah’s Little Blue John Canyon by himself and eventually had to amputate his own arm with a broken credit card after being trapped under a boulder for, well, 127 hours.

So Richards decided to take a trip to Little Blue John Canyon and go hiking by himself. Wanna take a guess at what happened next?

Canyonlands National Park rangers found Richards four days later. Along with the leg injury, he had dislocated his shoulder but was able to work it back into place.

“It took me about three or four minutes to work my shoulder and get it back in place, and once I got it back in place, I stood up and realized my ankle hurt a little bit,” Richards told WBTV in Charlotte, N.C.

Without cellphone service and only two protein bars to eat, Richards began crawling back to his car across the rocky terrain. He filled his water bottles with rain as he painstakingly retraced his steps, eventually dragging himself almost five miles.

(Via the Los Angeles Times)

Broken leg. Four days crawling across the desert in the middle of Bumblefart, Utah. All because he was inspired by a movie about a guy who already got trapped in the desert. I may not be the most fitness-crazy guy, nor do I really give a squat about nature (hooray technology!), but I’ve been told they have machines at gyms that can simulate this kind of exercise and adventure. Hell, if you want the experience of losing a limb, I’ll run you over in the parking lot. Beats the crap out of traveling 2,500 miles.