If you’re a fan of the Cleveland Browns (cough), you were probably happy when the team traded up in April to select Trent Richardson, the University of Alabama running back who led the team to a national championship and kinda looks like Robert Griffin III had a man-baby with Benedict Cumberbatch.

If you’ve been a fan of the Browns for more than seven months, you started waiting for the other foot to drop, citing LITERALLY EVERY OTHER DRAFT EVER as an example of Cleveland’s terrible, terrible luck. You remember Courtney Brown’s leg, William Green’s back wounds, Kellen Winslow’s motorcycle and Phil Taylor’s pec. You remember everything about Tim Couch other than Heather Kozar.

Anyway, I have good news and bad news. The good news is that you don’t have to wait very long for that other foot. The bad news is … well, you’re a Browns fan, you’ll figure it out.

The team issued a one-sentence statement Wednesday saying that the running back, picked No. 3 overall in April’s draft, will see a specialist on Thursday.

The statement says: “Trent Richardson is traveling to Pensacola, Fla., where he will have his left knee further evaluated by Dr. James Andrews tomorrow.” (via ESPN)

Or, “ESPN issued a two-sentence statement on Thursday recapping Wednesday’s announcement that Trent Richardson’s knee doesn’t work and you’re shit out of luck”.

So what do you think? Is this a temporary setback for a man with a bright NFL future, or another example of Cleveland being one of two U.S. cities built over a Hellmouth? More importantly, will he ever be able to break a dude’s ankles like this again?

I apologize in advance for all the “crazy reaction to LeBron winning a championship!” and crying children videos we’re probably going to share today. It’s the only thing happening. Bud Selig could be assassinated by Jose Canseco and my inbox would still be full of, “check out Erik Spoelstra Gatorade bath autotune remix”.

Anyway, my favorite of these so far is Cleveland’s News Channel 5 Chief Meteorologist Mark Johnson absolutely losing his shit because “heat” and “thunder” are weather terms he can’t escape. If you’re worried about people jumping on the “I always wanted LeBron to have a ring” bandwagon, this guy’s Network moment will ease your mind. THESE CHAMPIONSHIP WINS ARE DIRTY AS HELL, AND HE’S NOT GONNA TAKE IT ANYMORE.

I feel your pain, Mark. I really do. Video is after the jump.

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From a May 11 interview with ESPN:

“Actually, I don’t even believe in curses. It’s really sad how many people believe in curses. This is football; everyone gets hurt. If you run the ball 40 times a game, you’re going to get banged around and get nicks and bruises here and there, but I don’t pay too much attention to that. I’ll let it take care of itself.”

Then came an eight-touchdown, 600-yard decline in productivity, a hamstring injury, an exchange of tough guy back-and-forth with his team over a contract and that time he bailed on a charity gig with the Cleveland Boys And Girls Club. This deadly combination of bad PR, commonplace injury, personal assholery and “living in Cleveland” can only mean one thing.

From a December 19 interview with Cleveland.com:

“No doubt about it, things haven’t worked to my favor this year. There’s a few things that happened that made me believe in curses. Ain’t no doubt about it.”

There you have it. There ain not any doubt about it. Peyton Hillis is cursed, and the only way the Browns can get back on track is if Mike Holmgren tricks John Madden into walking over a cleverly disguised pit and rips off his face to reveal Old Man Jenkins from the abandoned amusement park.

I think they should find the worst player in the NFL and put him on the Madden 13 box just to see if he spontaneously combusts. Any takers?

[h/t to Shutdown Corner]

Ohio State has had a fantastic first half of 2011, from the firing of Jim Tressel to the forfeiting of an entire, Sugar Bowl-winning 12-1 season. The second half of the year is all about penance and proving their sincere adherence to Ohio and its culture, so it should come as no surprise that the school is one of three to have signed a deal making them an official part of the LeBron James Brand™. The South Florida Sun-Sentinel first reported Saturday that Ohio State would join Kentucky and Miami as the first three teams to specifically represent LeBron lebranded Nike gear, which should end up looking a lot like Michael Jordan’s, only without any rings. As accessories, I mean. Miami makes sense, Kentucky makes sense because of John Calipari, and Ohio State makes sense because they have no f**king clue what they’re doing anymore.

Of course, OSU has been supporting LeBron and sporting a LeBron logo since before that was a hangable offense, and Ohio State wins a lot so they’re the one Ohio-area sports team LeBron didn’t completely insult and abandon. And yeah, you can leave me a comment to tell me I’m a “hater” or whatever, but I don’t care about the Cavs or The Decision, I’m still pissed about him wearing a Yankees hat to an Indians game.

Anyway, Cleveland is of course already writing newspaper editorials about how Ohio State is tone-deaf to the state’s dislike of this guy, but honestly is there anything more “Ohioan” right now than not being able to shut up about LeBron James? It’s right there next to Jojo potatoes and flammable bodies of water. Bill Livingston of The Plain Dealer is impassioned in his response to the announcement, but he’s missing one important point:

But THE Ohio State University? Are they kidding?

Actually, OSU basketball players have worn “L23″ insignia since 2007 on their uniforms. During much of that time, James was a Cavalier and a non-quitter.

I don’t know if Bill watched those years when LeBron lead the Cavaliers into the playoffs, but they didn’t exactly end with LeBron valiantly battling the flu and pulling out a victory in the clutch. LeBron is the same guy, he’s just wearing a shirt we hate. If the LeBron Brand overtakes college sports, Cleveland isn’t going to have anyone to root for.

Man, I wish they had a baseball team.

[h/t The Dagger]

Two bits of fun news coming out of Cleveland, but let’s hit them one at a time. First, the powers that be at Cleveland’s Progressive Field found a way to actually get people to the stadium–host events not featuring a horrible baseball team.

As part of what the team calls Snow Days, the site’s centerpieces are a 10-lane tubing hill named the batterhorn that stretches from the middle of the bleachers into right field, and a quarter-mile ice skating track called the frozen mile — the first of its kind in the United States, the Indians say — that zips past the warning track, second base, the bullpens and underneath the bleachers.

“People can go somewhere and tube, they can go somewhere and ice skate, but they can’t do it in a setting like this, with the entertainment that our scoreboard group’s provided, the Christmas lights on the field; it’s just a completely unique entertainment option,” said Mark Shapiro, the team’s president and a person more accustomed to talking about pitchers and catchers. –NYT.

That sounds a helluva lot better than, oh I don’t know, watching the Indians, who finished a paltry 25 games out of first place in the AL Central last fall. They should just leave that slide up through the start of the season. It can’t be any more bastardly than playing with the designated hitter.

Update: Just added a new video with even more yelling and adult behavior!

While most of the world *dismissive wank* was tuned in to last night’s matchup between the Cleveland Indians and the New York Yankees to see if admitted steroid user Alex Rodriguez would hit No. 600 (he didn’t), one young fan had a different reason for heading to Jacobs Progressive Field. With his loyal young lady at his side, a fan wearing his brand new LeBron James Miami Heat jersey found his way to his seats in the left field bleachers. And the Cleveland fans absolutely loved him.

Within a minute of arriving at his seats, this Miami “fan” was greeted with cheers, as many Indians fans in his section turned around and stood up to make sure that he was comfortable and to ask if he needed anything. “Can I buy you a hot dog,” one fan yelled. “Are you and the lady comfortable, fair sire,” another chimed in. And once the fan had proudly displayed his loyalty to the Heat, the entire section focused on the game and chanted, “Get him out! Get him out!” Obviously they meant the Yankee batter.

Wipe away a city’s tears, NBC Sports:

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