What you’re looking at is the best-possible and most serendipitous sports “selfie” you can take.

Meet Tampa Bay Rays reporter Kelly Nash. In addition to being pretty and having a great baseball job, she comes equipped with a magical forcefield that keeps her from getting drilled by fly balls when she’s taking Instagram pics at Fenway Park instead of paying attention. The photo hasn’t been doctored … in fact, representatives from the Rays speaking with Yahoo Sports seemed surprised at the idea that anyone WOULD doctor a photo like that, and I have to agree. I can’t get my phone to take a picture of anything more mobile than a bowl of fruit without it blurring up. This photo was a gift.

If you’re wondering what mystical force kept Kelly from getting brained, here’s a quick conversation from her Twitter this morning explaining why she and actor Tony Danza are so very much alike:

Read the rest of this entry »

South Carolina cornerback Victor Hampton posted the above image to his Instagram account, and in case you don’t get it, that’s a giant Clemson Tigers orange paw print that some dastardly rascal spray painted on the field. To make matters worse, the very same scoundrel also sprayed “Go Tigers” on one of the Cockabooses next to the field, and when I finished laughing at that word, I was just as outraged as every Tom, Dick and SWAGGY Steve on that gorgeous campus in Columbia.

Fortunately, I have watched a few episodes of CSI in my day, and I fancy myself a bit of a sleuth when it comes to matters of the prankish persuasion, and not only have I already solved this crime using my alter ego, Sheriff BRO, but I will reveal the perpetrator to the entire world right now.

Read the rest of this entry »

"I have thought about this a lot, seriously."

If you’re like me, you have a problem with women, because women be trippin. You try to flirt with other girls on Instagram, because a woman will sleep with you if you hit the little heart button under a picture they’ve uploaded to the Internet, and your woman gets MAD at you, as if it’s YOUR fault for getting a hard-on for some titties in a “toaster” filter.

Thankfully, Philadelphia Eagles wide receiver DeSean Jackson is here with THE INSTAGRAM RULES FOR MEN, easily the most handy set of rules handed down since Moses descended Mount Sinai. Here they are, in their glory:

Read the rest of this entry »

You remember Australian hurdler Michelle Jenneke, right? If you don’t, here’s a quick rundown of her career to date:

1. She went crazy viral last July when we shared a video of her enthusiastically dancing during the Women’s 100 metres hurdles at the 14th IAAF World Junior Championships in Barcelona.
2. The Daily Mail, Bleacher Report and Huffington Post called us perverts for “unapologetically” sharing a slow-motion video of her dancing. You know, that they then shared by talking about how we shared it.
3. The Internet reacted badly, sending her nude photo spread and porn offers.
4. She decides to go hang out with the guys from theCHIVE, which is like a Red Sox player going to New York because they got offered more money.
5. Sports Illustrated gets her to dance in a swimsuit.

Now her time is mostly spent doing radio interviews and talk shows. She’s still trying to hurdle, at least, and recently went down with a hamstring injury. Because she is a young, beautiful person in the year 2013, she’s been chronicling the ailment on Instagram, and if you know anything about the placement of the hamstring, you’ll know that … yeah, it’s just pictures of her butt.

Here’s what she’s posted so far, you* pervert.

Read the rest of this entry »

From the Charlotte Bobcats Twitter/Instagram/Pinterest Or Whatever page:

PHOTOS: At the arena for his sold out concert, @JustinBieber was excited to meet Bobcats Chairman Michael Jordan

“Excited” wasn’t really the word. The word was SWAG, which I’m guessing Justin Bieber only breaks out for situations like meeting the greatest basketball player of all-time, and not for every f**king thing he does.

Thank you, Heavenly Father, for allowing this talented forever-child the opportunity to stand beside His Airness. For your next miracle, please allow Chris Paul’s son to know Bieber, yet still grow up bending the brims of his hats and having not that haircut.

This Instagram image doesn’t come with a lot of context — all that accompanied it in its tweet was “Just girls bein girls” — but hey, Kate Upton, Stacy Keibler and Maria Menounos hung out last night, all sat on the same side of the table (?) and made facetious mustaches with their chopsticks.

Sorry to be all “uh here’s this one picture” about it, but I thought you should be made aware. Yesterday was my birthday, so I like to think they got together to celebrate it and I just missed the e-vite. Thanks, ladies, I appreciate it.

(Also, I can’t wait for mustaches to stop being funny.)

[h/t to @BoondyAlBoondy]