"Siri, remind me to watch the MAHGFAQQINN LYMPICS."

One of the strangest and most precious gems from this weekend was discovering that Pulp Fiction slash The Avengers slash Star Wars slash everything else star Samuel L. Jackson loves the 2012 Summer Olympics and can’t stop tweeting about them.

It’s important to stress that this is not a parody, and that these are real tweets from @SamuelLJackson. They cover everything from handball to sync diving to Malaysian badminton, all with Jackson’s contractually obligated tendency to shoehorn curse words into anything he’s saying. The guy works in “f**k” like Jackson Pollock worked in drip. He spells it however he wants, puts it wherever he wants whether it makes sense or not and sometimes ends up with a mangle of consonants because he’s SAMUEL L. MARGHFAGGUIN JACKSON.

Normally I’d want to provide some kind of commentary or context for these, but that’d be like touching a baby bird. Two major warnings before you proceed:

1. These tweets may contain harsh language, and reader discretion is advised.

2. These tweets may contain language you did not know existed.

Please enjoy 20 of the best Sam Jackson tweets from this weekend, and join us every day between now and the end of the Olympics for 20 more.

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One of the early stories of the 2012 Summer Olympics in London has been North Korea’s refusal to participate until England stops calling them South Koreans. After today’s archery ranking round, maybe being South Korean won’t sound as bad.

Simultaneously bringing to life the dreams of The Hunger Games, The Avengers and Brave fanboys and girls across the Internet, South Korea’s Im Dong-hyun broke his own 72-arrow world record with a score of 699. His team followed his lead, breaking the team world record, scoring a combined 2,087. South Korea won the gold at the 2004 and 2008 games, and if this (and that scene in Best Of The Best where South Korean national teams train by shirtlessly chopping trees in the snow) is any indication, 2012 will be more of the same.

The best part? Im Dong-hyun can’t even see what he’s shooting at.

The Korean, who suffers from strong myopia and just aims at a “blob of yellow color” in the center of the target 70 meters away, was happy to be at the top of the ranking round but was not about to get carried away.

“It’s just the first round so I won’t get too excited about it,” he said.

Im’s team mate Kim [Bub-min] would also have broke the record after shooting 698, while the third member of the team Oh finished with 690.

Who gets to face off with the new World Record holder in round one? Why, Emanuele Guidi of San Marino, of course, ranked 64th in the world. Good luck with that, San Man.

[via Reuters, h/t to Yahoo Sports]