Ochocinco’s New Key To Victory: Annoy Everyone

Written by Brandon / 10.14.10

Ocho kills CarsonThe Cincinnati Bengals have started the 2010 campaign a little rougher than most anticipated. At 2-3, they are only one game up on the lowly Browns in the AFC North standings. What was supposed to be a dynamic passing attack has been anything but. Chad Ochocinco thinks he knows what the problem is. He claims it is his utter lack of production smack talk.

Sports Illustrated reported on Chad’s verbal diarrhea…

“I haven’t been the Chad of old, the Chad that we’re all used to – the boisterous, sometimes borderline cocky, arrogant,” he said. “But that’s the way I am and that’s what everybody feeds off as a city and as an organization, and I haven’t been that.

“I think when I do come back (from the bye), I’m going back to the Chad of old.”

The elephant in the Cincinnati locker room is Carson Palmer. He is currently a career worst 59.3% passing with 7 touchdowns and 6 interceptions, including two late game picks to give away the game last week to the Tampa Bay Buccaneers. Outside of the Patriots game to open the season, the Bengals defense has kept them in games, Palmer’s ineffectiveness just isn’t doing them any favors.

Chad added…

“I’m able to play my style by being boisterous, by talking, by giving other teams bulletin-board material and in my mind, I know I have no choice but to go out and perform at a high level,” he said. “I feed off that. You’ve been with me for 10 years and you know I’ve never been able to be quiet.”

Things he also hasn’t been able to do in 10 years include winning a playoff game, beating Darrelle Revis, making Roger Goodell’s Christmas card list, and spelling TJ Houshmandzadeh’s name correctly on Cincinnati overpasses.

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F THIS NOISE

Written by Matt / 09.17.07

I got off the redeye last night and have worked the entire goddam day feeling like my eyeballs were scraped with 30-grit sandpaper, and I get rewarded by having fucking NOTHING going on in the sports world?

Fuck it, here's a video of a Japanese guy beating a woman after a game of Rock, Paper, Scissors.

[100% Injury Rate

p.s. Everybody who's just now finding the "Leave Belichick alone" video — WL had it first.* Give a little credit to the weekend shift here, eh? (*update — or, as a reader notes, Barstool Sports.)
 

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