Rumors of the death of MMA fighter Kimbo Slice have been greatly exaggerated. Slice, whose “government name” is Kevin Ferguson, was mistaken by someone on Twitter for a gentleman of the same name that died over the weekend.

Mr. Slice himself was alerted to his fans’ concerns, and logged on to reassure everyone. “I’m straight, y’all,” he tweeted. “Thnkx for the concern. Some1 else with the same name passed away earlier from my old neighborhood.”

–Zap 2 It.

But seriously, Twitter has been really light on the dead celebrities lately. Of course, Leslie Nielsen and Don Meredith both had to die on weekends. Thanks a lot, guys.

Over the weekend, 135 of the world’s top athletes gathered in Heinola, Finland to compete in the World Sauna Championships. Hold on, let’s start this over. On Saturday, 135 dudes showed up in Heinola to sit in a sauna until they couldn’t take it anymore, and when the schvitz settled, local Finnish hero and defending champion Timo Kaukonen was declared the winner. Because his opponent in the finals died.

After six minutes in a 110-degree Celsius (that’s 230 degrees Fahrenheit to us Yanks) sauna with Kaukonen, Russia’s Vladimir Ladyzhenskiy wasn’t looking so hot, for lack of a better term. Event officials opened the doors to the sauna and both competitors collapsed. Kaukonen had successfully defended his title thanks to his signature move – having a pulse. Ladyzhenskiy’s death put an immediate end to the final round, certainly disappointing fans of watching people die in a sweaty box.

Is it hot in here or is it just me, Associated Foreign Press:

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Bizarre story out of Croatia today, and really, that’s the only thing we’d ever cover out of there. The staff in our With Leather Croatian Bureau are a bunch of lazy-asses.

The 32-year-old defender collapsed on the pitch in the 35th minute of the County League game against Hratski Sokola. The referee officiating the game, thinking that Tunjic took a dive, ran towards the fallen player and gave him the yellow card. Turns out, he wasn’t faking it. Tunjic had a heart attack. –Guanabee (from EuroSport)

That’s not really funny so much as bizarre, but it speaks to how much the referee can actually see in a game, being one person. If this had happened in America, mothers everywhere would be calling for referees to get basic medical training. That makes perfect sense to people that work in the kitchen all day. So…has the World Cup started yet?