The good news is that not every child born in Romania is destined to live the horror of those orphans that we’ve heard about for so long. The bad news is that the kids with families are being put into strict training programs that allow them to grow up as super children with giant muscles and major ass-kicking abilities. At least that’s the case for brothers Guiliano and Claudiu Stroe, who might possibly be the strongest 7- and 5-year old boys in the world, respectively.
While a lot of people might not be too keen on beefing up their toddlers, I can only imagine that somewhere Michelle Obama is scratching her chin and trying to determine a way to pump steroids into the cardboard that is chopped up before becoming cafeteria lunch meat. Better yet, don’t be surprised if Michelle and Snooki are spotting hanging out, as The Jersey Shore star’s pregnancy news could unlock the secret to producing juiced up Guido babies.
America cannot fall behind, damn it!