With Peyton Manning officially signed to a 5-year, $96 million deal to be the quarterback of the Denver Broncos, the Broncos are reportedly shopping Tebow for a third round draft pick, despite having originally drafted him in the first round. The rumor mill makes it seem as the frontrunners are the Jacksonville Jaguars – with owner Shad Kahn’s love of the Florida Gators legend and desire to fill seats – and the New York Jets – with their love of being in the spotlight and desire to fill the hole left by Brad Smith.

A decision is expected at some point today as to which team Tebow will be unceremoniously shipped off to, but there’s apparently another decision that needs to be made… involving Tebow’s heart. According to the NY Post, which really understands the important news, Tebow has wedged himself between Glee Star Dianna Agron and her boyfriend and apparent Disney cartoon character Sebastian Stan.

Tebow was spotted chatting with Agron at an Oscar party in late February.

Ooooh, they’re practically married already!

He was also seen days later on a date with Taylor Swift, although sources insist that — even though Swift appears to be sweet on Tebow — they are strictly friends.

The new split leaves the door open for Tebow to nab Agron. But the devout Christian quarterback has other things on his mind, such as his possible departure from the Broncos, who just signed Peyton Manning.

Tebow has been the focus of trade rumors with teams including the Jets, Miami Dolphins and Jacksonville Jaguars. Even Denver’s John Elway said, “Tim Tebow is a great kid. If I want someone to marry my daughter, it would be him.”

That is, of course, until Elway’s daughter complains that Tebow just can’t get it done on his own and she’s thankful that Von Miller and Matt Prater are able to come in and really pound away for the victory.

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These people: the reason you'll stop watching football.

Unless I can’t figure out how to get Ghorbash the Iron Hand to follow me through a ruin in Skyrim without bugging out and getting lost in the walls, this is the least important problem you’ll read about today: the NFL and Nike are concerned that if they use the Roman numeral “L” to represent the number 50 in 2016′s Super Bowl 50, people will think the Super Bowl and Nike mean “loser”. Remember when Super Bowl 30 happened and people started masturbating to it?

MyFoxDC.com expounds on the origin problem, going to great lengths to say, “hey, remember when Ace Ventura said loo-hoo-hoo zer-her? That’s what we’re worried about”.

In the 2003 book “Field Guide to Gestures,” the “loser gesture” was referenced as forming the letter L on your forehead with your index finger and thumb. The book offered a five-step primer that ended, “Say ‘loser’ with derision, generally elongating the first syllable.”

The sign has perpetuated in movies and TV shows since at least the 1990s. Most recently, the symbol was featured in promotional materials for “Glee” and has become something like a secret handshake for “Gleeks” since the show’s 2009 premiere.

L can mean a lot of things. Have you ever picked up a large shirt, looked at the tag and though “ugh, I can’t wear this, look at this tag, people will think I’m a loser“? Have you ever picked up a copy of ELLE magazine and flipped though it for LAN Party tips? Hopefully by the time 2016 rolls around, Glee will be long-canceled and the people in charge of the biggest sporting event on the planet will say, “okay, it’s a letter, let’s move on with our lives”. Or maybe they’ll call it SUPER BOWLL and go for a Lloyd Moseby vibe.

Until then, we have to out the people who get a hard-on from this as the world’s true losers:

“L standing for loser with a Nike swoosh right above it — I love that,” said Blake Lundberg, general manager of Adidas’ sports licensed division.

[h/t Fark Sports]

If the Rapture happens tomorrow, humanity will mark its lowest point as Christina Aguilera’s performance of the national anthem at Super Bowl XLV. People like to talk about how she messed up the words, but usually fail to mention that both of her ear drums fell out and caused her to forget what music sounds like. The greatest victims were the players who had to stand there and be reverent while she growled and shouted her way to a nationally-divisive conclusion.

During an appearance on 540 ESPN Milwaukee with the D-List, Green Bay Packers quarterback Aaron Rodgers shared his story of survivial.

During the pregame of Super Bowl XLV did you notice that Christina Aguilera messed up the U.S. National Anthem?

No doubt about it. No doubt about it. First of all the chick from ‘Glee’ killed the first song. She should have sang the anthem too. I knew because it was the Super Bowl … I don’t like standing in the front row because I don’t like being or having that camera right in front of my face. I know I’m on the bazillion foot jumbotron, so I’m going to stand behind some people who maybe aren’t the most TV recognizable names and see if I can blend in. So I kind of went and hid in the back. I don’t know who I was standing next to, but she [Christina Aguilera] starts singing it and in most of the stadiums they have the words up on the board, kind of up-and-above the singer, so she can tell that she screwed up.

She screwed up and I knew it and something was off. I’m looking around going does anyone else realize this? I don’t think they had because I don’t think the people were listening, but I knew something was off, so I kind of tapped … I think it was Diyral Briggs next to me and I said, ‘Hey did you hear that?’ He was like, ‘What?’ I’m like, ‘She just totally screwed it up’, so I look up at the board and see where she is at and I realized she just totally messed that up. I wonder … people have got to know she just screwed that up? I feel kind of bad for her, but at the same time, come on now.

And I was like, Aaron Rodgers just outed himself as a Gleek. I wonder if he turned to Diyral Briggs and asked him what he thought of that snippet of Puck and Artie’s version of “Bella Notte.” Wait, I don’t wonder that at all, sh**

[H/T Weed for Speed]

A new study by the social media service FanGager has determined that the “fans” on Manchester United’s Facebook page are the most active of any fan page on Mark Zuckerberg’s cash cow. Out of the Top 15 fan pages listed in the study, Man U. ranks 8th in the actual number of fans at 9,915,504 (as of the study’s end) but the club’s 256,206 “active” fans gives the page the highest active percentage at 2.6%. Finishing second was Justin Bieber’s Facebook fan page, which means that the teenage singer is officially worse than soccer.

According to Wired:

Launched in the U.S. one month ago, FanGager uses Facebook and Twitter open APIs to track social activity and brand engagement. After producing a report for a brand, FanGager offers a selection of applications that allow companies to build fan activity and engagement.

“Brands have been collecting fans and followers for some time,” Eran Gefen, FanGager’s founder and CEO, told Wired.com in a recent interview. “But the real question is not how many fans you have, but how many active and engaged fans you have.”

And that’s true, because the active fans are those who are stupid enough to click on the advertising links that Khloe Kardashian sends out in order to collect $10,000 per click.

Aside from pop culture sensations like Bieber, Glee, Jersey Shore, Ke$ha and Britney Spears, Man U. also topped popular sports pages like Real Madrid C.F. and FC Barcelona, while the Kansas City Royals fan page fell just short*.

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So I got an email from the Arizona Diamondbacks last night, and they were all, “Hey, we did one of those videos where everyone lip syncs to a song and we did it all in one take and some of our players are in it, even though most people won’t recognize their names.” And all I could think was, “Why the hell are you guys working in December?” But yeah, the video’s not bad, even though it’s a total shill job for selling tickets for Christmas. The effort is there, although that little girl is a terrible actress and the guy at the end is waaay too excited. If the Coyotes would have done this, they probably wouldn’t have to move.

You can watch it here. Or wait until teams learn how to enable embedding. Wow, that sounded really passive-aggressive. But no, Andy Warhol’s not in the video. They did not give a reason why.