You remember Australian hurdler Michelle Jenneke, right? If you don’t, here’s a quick rundown of her career to date:

1. She went crazy viral last July when we shared a video of her enthusiastically dancing during the Women’s 100 metres hurdles at the 14th IAAF World Junior Championships in Barcelona.
2. The Daily Mail, Bleacher Report and Huffington Post called us perverts for “unapologetically” sharing a slow-motion video of her dancing. You know, that they then shared by talking about how we shared it.
3. The Internet reacted badly, sending her nude photo spread and porn offers.
4. She decides to go hang out with the guys from theCHIVE, which is like a Red Sox player going to New York because they got offered more money.
5. Sports Illustrated gets her to dance in a swimsuit.

Now her time is mostly spent doing radio interviews and talk shows. She’s still trying to hurdle, at least, and recently went down with a hamstring injury. Because she is a young, beautiful person in the year 2013, she’s been chronicling the ailment on Instagram, and if you know anything about the placement of the hamstring, you’ll know that … yeah, it’s just pictures of her butt.

Here’s what she’s posted so far, you* pervert.

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An 11-year old Belgian girl taught a cow how to jump hurdles. This cow versus Michelle Jenneke, let’s make it happen. Or, I don’t know, let’s make theCHIVE make it happen. (via Gadget Telegram)

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Links

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Gruden Talk: Jon Discusses Marijuana Legalization With NORML’s Dr. Dale Gieringer |Kissing Suzy Kolber|

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Back in July, With Leather created an Internet maelstrom (or “malestrom”) of guys furiously GIFfing and watermarking pictures of Australian hurdler Michelle Jenneke. The clip of her infectiously smiling and dancing before owning heat 2 of the Women’s 100 metres hurdles at the 14th IAAF World Junior Championships in Barcelona went nuclear, we were called perverts by everyone from the UK Daily Mail to Yahoo!, and it ultimately led to Michelle getting offers to pose nude by … basically everybody.

What it never led to was Michelle Jenneke hanging out with us, playing video games with us or sharing pancakes. Or crying at Up. Or any of the things that were special and rightfully ours.

Somehow, theChive had the connections to live our dreams. I guess UPROXX was too busy not fulfilling our dreams and let this one slip through the cracks. Anyway, I am now officially Forever Alone, and you can watch this clip of people I don’t know palling around with a lady I don’t know and ruining my life.

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Last week (Jesus, has it only been a week?), we caused a viral Internet dancestorm when a clip of sexy Australian hurdler Michelle Jenneke and the admittedly sorta tasteless follow-up of animated GIFs and slow motion video started showing up everywhere. No, seriously, everywhere. Everyone from The Huffington Post to Daily Mail UK and Yahoo! copy-pasted the story and declared us perverts

Hey, at least we didn’t ask her to pose nude for us, then try to guilt her into it by saying we’d give money to her track team.

Jenneke was even reportedly asked by Sex.com to pose nude, but for a charity of course. According to a press release on XBIZ.com, the website offered Jenneke an offer to pose nude for a “sizable donation” to the Australian Sports Commission (ASC).

“She’s the right amount of cute and sexy, not to mention her body is clearly in peak condition,” Sex.com spokesperson Martin Ellison said. “Michelle Jenneke has shown a sex appeal that’s uncommon in female athletes and we want Michelle to know that she can use her sexuality to not only raise her profile but also benefit athletes all over her country.” (via IBTimes.com)

We also never once thought to put a fat Italian guy in women’s track and field clothes and have him parody Jenneke’s infectious enthusiasm and win (her win, I feel the need to emphasize) by flailing his arms around and “running like a girl” to disco music. Still, this happened:

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I have a shocking and incredible news flash for you – people love attractive female athletes. I know that some female athletes have complained in the past that they don’t like to be objectified or seen as sex objects, but deep down they know it’s unavoidable. That’s why so many other female athletes embrace it. But that won’t stop people from acting like we’re the bad guys for posting some videos, pictures, and GIFs of an attractive girl, despite the fact that we also pointed out that she’s incredible at her sport.

Enter The Daily Mail, which picked up the story of Australian hurdler Michelle Jenneke, who has absolutely shattered Internet records for becoming an instant sensation. Not since Allison Stokke have we seen someone become this amazingly popular and cherished in a matter of hours. From the moment we posted her video on Wednesday, the footage of Michelle dancing before she won the second heat of the Women’s 100 metres hurdles at the 14th IAAF World Junior Championships redefined viral.

And hey, look at us, we’re famous now. For being perverts, or something.

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Yesterday afternoon we shared with you the video of 19-year old Australian track and field star Michelle Jenneke winning the 100m hurdles at the 14th IAAF World Junior Championships in Barcelona, and while that in itself is not necessarily the recipe for viral video success, a beautiful woman go-go dancing before destroying everybody at hurdles is. The video was quickly taken down (because even track and field doesn’t think you should watch track and field) but just as quickly replaced with dance music and slow motion versions.

Yes, here’s the slow motion version:

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