Rachel Alexandra (foreground, in yellow) was the first filly in 85 years to win the Preakness, holding off Kentucky Derby winner Mine That Bird by a length. But the odd thing is now that the lady horse–who sat out of the Derby–may not even enter the Belmont. From Y! Sports:

“I personally think she’s proven what [owner Jess Jackson] set out to prove with her immediately, which doesn’t eliminate anything,” [trainer Steve] Asmussen said. “But I think it does take a tad of the urgency off it.”

“We’ll wait for three or four days, see how she comes out of the race,” Jackson said. “Then we’ll give her the same scrutiny we did with the vets, and of course working her out, and get the opinion of everybody that’s involved.”

Since the horse was female, she was only paid 2/3 of the purse that they would have awarded a stallion. But at least the sexual advances in the starting gate were kept to a minimum. So much for progres…

I guess we should do a post on the Preakness, seeing as there’s been a bit of a hullabaloo about this lady horse being favored to win. But some people at the Louisville Courier-Whatzitcalled are worried that everyone’s gonna think of Eight Belles again if something TERRIBLE HAPPENS OH MY GAWD, NO! (via GameOn):

She’s not only the 8-5 Preakness morning-line favorite, she’s also instant adrenaline for horse racing, the next great thing to turn the heads of casual fans.

Unless …

Unless the tragic memories are stirred again about Eight Belles and Ruffian, who both suffered fatal injuries while running against colts.

Women. Can’t live with ‘em. Can’t hop on their backs and ride them for nine-and-a-half furlongs. Oh, yeah, I guess that’s an image of Sarah Jessica Parker there and not a horse. That’s an honest mistake on my part and I’ll fix it right away. Shortly. Maybe.

One of the great traditions in horse racing is coming to an end. Pimlico Race Course will no longer allow “race fans” to bring their own booze into the infield. From the New York Times (via 100 Percent Injury Rate):

“I’ve seen people get drilled by people randomly heaving cans of beer,” said Matt Schultz, 29, who lives in Baltimore and has been on the Pimlico infield for the Preakness the past four years. “I saw one girl literally get knocked to the ground by one.”

Organizers of the Preakness Stakes, the second event in horse racing’s Triple Crown, want a tamer experience on Saturday for the 134th running of the race. Fans can no longer bring their own beverages to the infield. Sixteen-ounce beers will be sold for $3.50, and they will come in plastic cups instead of unopened cans.

I get the safety issue, and $3.50 for a pint of beer isn’t a terrible price, but it’ll still be enough to price people out of spending an entire day there (and one would wonder what the point would be otherwise). But the people running these events need to realize how fun alcohol abuse can be. It’s as warming to the heart as a child’s laughter, provided that child is 27 years old with a 0.25 blood alcohol level.

Also resting in peace (hopefully): Wayman Tisdale. Sad. I guess.

An Australian jockey was suspended 18 months for handing off urine to another jockey to beat a drug test. Why are jockeys being tested for drugs? Does Australia just have a surplus of those little cups?

Queensland Racing Limited’s integrity counsel officer Allison Finlay, formerly with the Australian Crime Commission, told Halliday that Evans had conspired with jockey Donna Carrigg to deceive stewards by supplying an instrument containing his urine to be used as a substitution for hers.

That inquiry heard Carrigg was found by stewards to have in the arm of her riding jacket a tied condom filled with urine and containing a sharpened lollypop stick.

A lollipop stick? Just how many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tinkle Pop? Sorry, I’m just so grossed out by this whole thing. The only appropriate place to pass that sort of thing is in a toilet or onto the face of a sexual partner receiving cash. Service with a stream, I like to call it.

|Morning Bulletin (G’Day, Mate!)|

I actually watched the race in a bar, so I credit USA Today TV columnist Michael Hiestand for catching the fact that NBC’s race announcer missed Mine That Bird sneaking along the rail to win the 135th Kentucky Derby:

NBC race caller Tom Durkin, who has called more than 60,000 races, seemed to be caught flatfooted by 50-1 longshot Mine That Bird’s stretch run.

Durkin didn’t call the eventual winner’s inside charge — which, on replays, showed the value of NBC’s overhead cameras — and made only his second mention of the horse when Mine That Bird had a three-length lead. He always mentions each horse early in the race.

Also, betting was down slightly at the track and elsewhere, perhaps because the awesomely-named early favorite I Want Revenge scratched because of a leg injury. Only two more horse races to care about this year. Or one, if Mine That Bird decides to lose the Preakness or break his leg.

What happens when you merge NASCAR with the sport of kings? Magic, my friends. Oh, and two horses colliding during a warmup on the Churchill Downs racetrack. I gave this a closer look and I swear I saw glue squirt out from the impact. I’m assuming that was the magic part.

I understand that now they’ll be posting signs near the track to better enforce traffic, but horses cannot read. They are horses. Those signs will not be read to them.

Thanks to Vince for thinking of us.