Recently, CBS Sports analyst and GREAT DAD Seth Davis came under fire when he said he wouldn’t want his kids watching mixed martial arts because (and I’m paraphrasing here) two men are near each other and that means gay. From his Twitter:

“Looking on news sites showing picture of two muscular bloody men in homoerotic fighting pose….Sorry, I’ll never get this UFC thing.”

“Maybe I’m a prude on this but I’m also a dad. I don’t mind my sons watching boxing, but I wouldn’t want them watching a UFC bout.”

Davis quickly realized that he wanted to keep his job his mistake and apologized for the offending tweets, but the always progressive UFC was reading, and took it to heart.

Since Seth Davis’ Gay Kids-Gate, UFC President Dana White has worked tirelessly to clear up any worries about homoeroticism in man-on-man combat, making sure all fighters wear full, baggy bodysuits and only touch each other with fully extended arms and legs. He’s also named Corn Nuts the “official nut sack” of Ultimate Fighting and makes sure the announcer tells everybody about their nut sacks before a fight. Okay, one of those two sentences is true. Corn Nuts! They’re corn, all the way to the core. THE CORE OF YOU.

I hope Mr. Davis enjoyed this clip. More importantly, I hope Mr. Davis enjoys the great taste of Corn Nuts.

[h/t to Cage Potato]

There’s no point in getting all maudlin and preachy about this, but it should be shown to as many people as possible: Toronto Blue Jays shortstop Yunel Escobar showed up to Saturday’s game against the Boston Red Sox with “you are a faggot” written on his eye-black in Spanish. Somewhere an entire high school of Alabama football fans just got really into the Blue Jays.

The words under Mr. Escobar’s eyes were “TU ERE MARICON,” which can be translated as “You are a faggot.” Other possible translations of the phrase lack the homophobic connotation, but are nevertheless offensive.

Mr. Escobar, a 29-year-old native of Havana, Cuba, has been seen at other games this season with different Spanish phrases written on his eye black. (via The Globe And Mail)

The other translation that is offensive but not homophobic is, “you are a pussy”. Long story short, there’s no way he thought he was writing “you are a jerk” on his face in Spanish, and no matter how he translates it it was something stupid and awful. Like I said, I don’t need to hop up onto a soap box and start pointing giant fingers at a dude who wrote “you are a faggot” on his face in magic marker, and unless Sarah Palin starts TwitPicking herself wearing a Yunel Escobar jersey we can probably just roll our eyes, dismiss Yunel’s contributions to baseball with a wanking motion and continue not giving a shit about the Blue Jays.

Here’s a statement from the people who do care about the Blue Jays, the Blue Jays:

The Toronto Blue Jays do not support discrimination of any kind nor condone the message displayed by Yunel Escobar during Saturday’s game. The club takes this situation seriously and is investigating the matter.

Alex Anthopoulos, Sr. VP Baseball Operations and General Manager will be available to the media tomorrow afternoon at Yankee Stadium and we expect him to be joined by Yunel Escobar, Manager John Farrell and Coach Luis Rivera. Details and location for the media availability will be announced tomorrow.

I hope Yunel’s response to the media is either “a less important person did it and didn’t tell me what I was sticking to my face” followed by a mailroom firing or “I AM a homophobe, losers!” followed by a bunch of crotch-chopping. Maybe next time he’ll skip the slurs and go straight to the offensive eye-black classics, like “DONG 3:16″.

[h/t to Big League Stew]

In case you’d forgotten that Alabama sports fans still think “you are gay” is the best possible insult for rival teams, feast your proud, heterosexual eyes on these Spanish Fort High School students and their “Purple? Man, that’s GAY” sign. Hold on, the reason for this is really complex and I don’t want to lose you — rival school Daphne wears purple uniforms, which makes them homeauxs. Or whatever.

If that wasn’t enough, ESPN’s broadcast of the Spanish Fort/Daphne game also featured a giant DAPHNE, ISN’T THAT A GIRL’S NAME banner, cementing the idea that Daphne High School is full of not only gays, but gay ladies. As Jason at Sportress Of Blogitude points out, the worst part isn’t the rampant, regressive homophobia or the casual misogyny of rednecks, it’s that somebody played a football team named “Daphne” and didn’t Scooby-Doo Joke the shit out of them.

Maybe Scooby-Doo is too dated of a reference. If so, and if you’re gonna be a gay-bashing moron anyway, at least start blasting “Single Ladies” and pull one of these routines:

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"And all he wanted to talk about was where I got my underwear."

The fun of any Olympics is political subplots, as politicians, special interest groups, and various mouth-breathing hate mongers can use the global focus of this gathering of the world’s greatest athletes as a chance to draw attention to themselves. One of the issues that has people fired up leading into the London games is the inclusion of nations that enforce laws that discriminate against gays and lesbians, and many people think that those countries should be banned, while others think they shouldn’t. And while the argument is important, it’s probably rather unfair and distracting to the openly gay athletes who are competing in this year’s Olympics.

But since I hate politics and giving credence to those who discriminate, let’s talk about the lighter side of Olympic homosexuality, as it was believed this week that all of the gay that was descending upon London had crashed the gay singles app Grindr. Of course, that had some people (who I won’t name) freaking out because they thought this was the surest sign of the pending gaypocalypse. Turns out they were wrong. And stupid.

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