Golden-voiced panhandler Ted Williams is having a fire…sale. He’s planning to auction off his camouflage jacket and cardboard sign. Because where else could you get those?

The man with the golden voice wanted to put the sign on eBay to raise money for the “Ted Williams Second Chance Foundation.”

During his homeless days, Williams used the sign to panhandle and was holding it the day he was discovered by a reporter from The Columbus Dispatch.

–Fox 8 Cleveland.

I have a feeling that his “Second Chance Foundation” is a rubber coin purse in his sock where he keeps his booze money. You know what they say, after a second chance, and a third, and a fourth, you’ll surely find a fifth. Actually, I don’t know anyone that says that. It’s quite long and cumbersome to be a popular saying.

The Pats and Colts meet on Sunday Night in what is almost certainly Peter King’s “alone in the control room with no pants on” game of the week. And while you may think that the Colts’ 3-4 record and Tom Brady’s absence takes a bit of the air out of this matchup, I advise you check out these comments from Pats coach, noted devotee of the film “Sliver,” and hobo king Bill Belichick, tossing a little extra gasoline on the fiah! Noted by the Globe’s Mike Reiss:

…he stopped mid-sentence and said: “Going back to Manning for a second, if I’m not mistaken he hasn’t been on the injury report all year, other than maybe one day right at the beginning of the season. I’m not really sure what injuries you’re talking about. He hasn’t been listed on the report all year, so I’m assuming he’s not hurt.”

Using my trusty Belichick mumble translator, I have decoded that statement so that it reads more accurately.

See? The Colts also lie on their injury reports too! And if they aren’t lying, then Manning is just a huge pussy! Now let’s go bore a hole in a woman’s bathroom and see if we can spot some girl’s steel wool.”

You need a damn PhD in passive aggression to decipher that man, I tell you.

Bad MS Paint courtesy of Ape at KSK.