You know your video has gone mainstream when a Chuck Norris parody account is your highest-rated comment. Anyway, remember the flipping cheerleader who drained a half court trick shot? She’s back to do it again, this time with the Harlem Globetrotters, a Flip Video camera and some cataracts-causing video editing. Enjoy. (via Bob’s)

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The Winter Classic is happening. It was canceled forever ago, but on the 7th of January the (cough) fine men and women of Michigan will be able to enjoy the outdoor novelty sports action they were promised in lieu of the NHL Lockout.

The only catch is that hockey won’t be involved, and the Detroit Red Wings will be played by the Harlem Globetrotters. The Toronto Maple Leafs will be played by whatever they’re calling the Generals these days. But hey, it’s still happening on an ice rink. ‘Harlem Globetrotters On Ice’ is something you’d pay to see, right?

Detroit Red Wings Alumnus Kevin Miller will join the Globetrotters to help them continue their winning ways. Miller brings over a decade of NHL experience to the Globetrotters basketball game on ice, which will take place shortly after the NHL’s cancelled “Winter Classic” was scheduled in Michigan on New Year’s Day.

“We hope the NHL can return to the ice as quickly as possible,” said Globetrotters CEO Kurt Schneider. “But in the meantime, we thought the Globetrotters could help fill the void of professional sporting events on an ice surface. And it’s only fitting we play this outdoor game in Michigan, as our tour continues in Kalamazoo the next day.”

A court of ice makes that whole “I’m gonna toss a bucket of water on you” gag more threatening, at least. YOU’RE BAD AT BASKETBALL, I’M GONNA GIVE YOU PNEUMONIA.

If you’re interested in a sneak peak of Globetrotter Winter Classic shenanigans, here’s a highlight video from the last time they performed on ice, two years ago in New York:

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In a few months, I’m going to sink into depression. It won’t be because the Miami Dolphins will be 0 and whatever and it won’t have anything to do with the Orlando Magic embarking on a 4-win season. My misery will stem from 30 Rock airing its final episode and NBC turning its back on one of the greatest comedies in TV history in favor of low hanging fruit like Guys with Kids. But that’s what happens when only a few million people tune in. The Two and a Half Mens of this world win.

One of the many – many, many, many – reasons that I love 30 Rock and consider it in the same category as Seinfeld and Cheers is because of the writing and the lines that most people don’t even hear. With 30 Rock, there’s always a main joke, but beneath that first layer is another layer and another layer, which makes each episode as re-watchable as the next. And within those jokes and layers are some of the smartest and funniest sports jokes that have ever been written for a sitcom.

I actually started working on this before Brandon started this wonderful series, and I had about 60-something scenes and jokes picked out, but I narrowed it down to my favorite moments. Enjoy and reflect, because after this season we’ll have to hope that Tina Fey and Co. take their talents elsewhere.

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If the opportunity to win was one was one of LeBron’s priorities of a new home, he may have a pretty tempting offer on the table. The Harlem Globetrotters, bane of the Washington Generals, have extended offers to both LeBron James and Dwyane Wade. I guess they “misplaced” the number of Bryant Reeves’ representation.

In a serious effort/marketing move, the Harlem Globetrotters are making a pitch to sign LeBron & Dwyane Wade & offering ownership. They will offer 51 percent of revenue from licensed merchandise sales with no limit plus part ownership. Well, they haven’t lost since ’71. –USAToday.com via @PDcavsinsider

The Globetrotters have already begun selling jerseys for LeBron and Dwyane for $75, a small price to pay for what I’m sure will be an awesome novelty item in 10 years. The team was nice enough to give the two nicknames before they even joined the squad, which caused Curly Neal to grumble that they need to “pay their dues.” LeBron would wear #6, with “King” on the back, while Wade would wear #3, with “D-Wade” on the back. There’s no way this is going to happen. Unless they watched the movie Semi-Pro and said to themselves “Yea, that looks like a reasonable career decision.” Read the rest of this entry »

“C’mon, he’s using a freaking ladder!”

All right. That’s two instances of me referencing that Simpsons episode where Krusty’s all-consuming gambling problem forces him to bet on the Washington Generals. The joke being that putting money on the Generals is foolish, because they’re only slightly more likely to win than the Washington Wizards.

Anyway, Willie Veasley, Avery Jukes and Nick Rodgers, three members of the National Championship finalist Butler Bulldogs signed one-day contracts to play as members of the Generals against the Harlem Globetrotters, who really need to diversify their playing schedule a little. I mean, I signed up for the season ticket package, hoping to pull a couple games against the Lakers, Cavs, Magic, Thunder and Hornets, but instead it’s 82 games against the same team. At least they have the good sense to play that stupid whistling song non-stop during all their games.

The Harlem Globetrotters helped close down the old Philadelphia Spectrum last night in an interesting way–they played a game on the roof. Wow. I guess the sign on the front door read “WHITES ONLY.”

In one of their more bizarre locales since playing a fearsome fivesome of robots on Gilligan’s Island, the Globetrotters said farewell to the Spectrum on Thursday with a game against the Washington Generals on the roof of the soon-to-be demolished arena.

It was a rare chance for the Globetrotters to raise the roof before the roof gets razed.

“It’s another crazy idea that we do,” said Special K, real name Kevin Daley.

“You’re going down,” was more than trash talk, it was a legitimate scare.

The Spectrum roof was 120 feet above the basketball floor in the arena. The Globetrotters will play two more games in Philadelphia this weekend, but their chances of qualifying for the NCAA tournament this year are pretty slim. Probably because they’re not affiliated with any college whatsoever.

[International Herald Tribune, as seen on FanIQ]