While I’ve yet to try Ron Swanson’s guaranteed hangover cure, I have tried hundreds, if not thousands, of others and not a single one works. Hell, there was even a time when I would have paid a million doll hairs for a case of XXX Vitamin Water because I was convinced that it was the ultimate hangover cure, but it turns out that 50 Cent and the makers of that sugar water bullsh*t were simply full of crap. If I can’t trust a mediocre rapper for my vitamins, who can I trust?

But it appears that some UCLA professor/doctor/scientist types have their eyes on the lucrative, untapped market of leaving frat boys’ bathroom sinks unclogged, as UCLA’s Yunfeng Lu and Cheng Ji are hard at work on an actual, honest-to-Pappy Van Winkle cure for the common hangover. Sorry cancer, maybe next year.

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Michelle Wie had a bad day yesterday:

Wie's woes continued Saturday at the LPGA Championship when she shot an 11-over 83 at Bulle Rock, leaving her in last place by five shots among the 84 players who made the cut and uncertain if she would show up for the final round.

I'd like to remind you that Michelle has expressed interest in competing at PGA events.  Carding 11-over scores for a single round is not going to get you there Miss Wie.  To be fair, Wie has been recovering from a broken left wrist since January:

An LPGA Tour official clarified midway through the back nine that "Rule 88," in which non-tour members are banned for a year if they fail to break 88, would not be an issue because it only applies before the cut is made. A week ago, Wie withdrew at 14 over par with two holes to play with a bad wrist, raising speculation that she was worried about losing the rest of her LPGA Tour schedule with two more bogeys. 

Is failing to shoot an 88 really 'Rule 88'?  If so, that's too perfect to be a coincidence, and it displays clearly that a supreme intelligence designed the Universe.  Anyway, I should have said Wie is "recovering from a broken left wrist".  I'm not criticizing her, even your stalwart assistant editor uses some crutches to get through the day.  Like when I'm late for work on a Sunday morning after a long Saturday night discussing my abhorrence for the designated hitter over many a jar of J.J. & S,  I may have been heard to say that I'm "recovering from influenza". -KD