NASCAR stories are tricky. They can be huge news and the video can have 500,000 views, but chances are 90% of your audience completely missed it. It is in that spirit that I present to you the best moment from Saturday’s NAPA Auto Parts 200 in Montreal — Patrick Carpentier’s crew chief Jerry Baxter responding to a questionable move from driver Steve Wallace by pulling his hair. YouTube user SupaLatinaHeat sums up the events with an Apollo-style class: “When Black guys get angry they fight with their fists. When White guys get angry they pull each other’s hair.” I guess that explains why everybody in UFC shaves their head.
The post-catfight interview is also pretty hilarious, as Wallace sneaks “only girls pull hair” into the standard “we faced obstacles but did our best” speech, apologizing profusely for spinning out Carpentier and still managing to call Baxter a wimpy d-bag. Because, honestly, who pulls hair? The whole thing was a Baby Buster short away from being one of Arrested Development’s “Boyfights”.
I’m going to watch the next race with my hand on Print Screen. I don’t want to miss Carl Edwards getting his panties tossed in the freezer.
[hair tip to Larry Brown Sports]
British tabloids are “blazing hot” this morning after Manchester United striker Wayne Rooney tweeted the first photo of his hair transplant, because British tabloids spent a month talking about that one lady’s wedding hat and get bent out of shape over everything. Within minutes the Daily Mail had constructed a 10,000-word essay and a slideshow photo gallery of Wayne Rooney’s skull scab. Rooney got a hair transplant because he’s a rich grown up.
