- As I mentioned if you follow me on Twitter, this week I’m doing my second ever old show Best And Worst report for No Way Out 2007. It should be fun. Check back for that on Friday, or Saturday, or one of the weekdays after that when I’m making excuses about how I write too much.
- Comments are appreciated! You guys are pretty solid on that at this point, but by now you should be sharing the column on Facebook, “liking” it, Tweeting it, tweeting ABOUT it, whatever. Pinterest it, if that’s a thing people do.
The Best Of #Kenny Powers - “So, besides getting shot in the back of the head do you know what else Abraham Lincoln did? He was a champion wrestler in high school and no, I’m not making that up.” [UPROXX]
One ‘Community’ Character Will Die: Let’s Place Odds - Can it please be Chang? There’s nothing Chang does the Dean can’t do better. [Warming Glow]
5 Reasons “Comic Book Men” Stinks - Reason number f**king one: we are not 18 anymore, and “tell ‘em Steve-Dave” just doesn’t have the same impact. [Gamma Squad]
Sports, Illustrated: In Celebration Of Alex Morgan’s Body Paint Bikini - Lots of swimsuits this week. Make sure you didn’t miss the one made out of paint. [With Leather]
Nicki Minaj Offended The World At The Grammys - or, “Nicki Minaj did something on purpose to make headlines because she isn’t good at music and people bought it, because people are dumb”. [Smoking Section]
Henry Rollins’ awesome letter to Chris Farley from 1995 - Sadly, not the same Chris Farley. “YOUR FILM BLACK SHEEP WAS MALICIOUS AND CAPRICIOUS.” [Film Drunk]
Inevitable ‘Who The F*ck Is Bon Iver?’ Reactions Vastly Improved By The Rise Of ‘Bonnie Bear’ & ‘Bony Bear’ - Dude should just change his band’s name to Bonnie Bear and be done with it. I’d listen to Bonnie Bear. [UPROXX]
NYU Girls’ Newt Gingrich Slumber Party - Nowhere near as awesome as Kent State’s Dennis Kucinich parties, where all the girls are 6-foot-3 vegan redheads. [Buzzfeed]
15 Funny Valentine’s Day Quotes By Comedians - “Those flowers fer yer wife fer Valentine’s Day? NOPE, just thought I’d do a lil’ mid-February gardenin’! Here’s yer sign!” – Bill Engvall [HuffPost Comedy]
Jay Z’s ‘99 Problems’ Recreated with Film Clips - See, THIS is what the Internet is for. [Brobible]
Movies That Should Get The 3D Treatment - Not gonna lie, I would go see a 3-D re-release of Snow Dogs. Country Bears, too. [Adult Swim]
20 Favorite Rom-Com Actors Under 40 - I feel like you shouldn’t be a “rom-com actor”, you should just be an actor who has appeared in a romantic comedy. Once you get into Kate Hudson territory it’s time for retirement. [Moviefone]
UPROXX 2012 Grammy Awards Open Thread - In case you need to know what everyone’s talking about this morning. Quick recap: Adele won everything, Whitney Houston died, Nicki Minaj blows. [UPROXX]
Whitney Houston Dies At 48 - And if you missed that part, recreate the media’s response to Whitney’s death by playing the first 30 seconds of “I Will Always Love You” on loop. [Smoking Section]
George Lucas says Greedo ALWAYS shot first, you were just confused - I don’t want to be too crude on this blog, but George Lucas can eat my entire asshole. [Film Drunk]
A Compendium of Cool Comics Cosplay: February 10th - I’m not in this one, but you should check it out anyway. Big Barda ftmfw. [Gamma Squad]
Let’s Overanalyze These New ‘Game of Thrones’ Photos - Spoiler alert: all major characters die in the first episode of the new season, are replaced by those characters’ cousins. And Ashton Kutcher. [Warming Glow]
Nic Cage Broke His Legendary Time-Traveling Vampire Silence On Letterman - How did it get born? How did it get born HOW DID IT GET BORN? [UPROXX]
20 People Who Think Oprah Is Whitney Houston - Buzzfeed is making a killing off the 20 stupidest people to tweet every day. 20 people who think the moon is made of sandwiches! [Buzzfeed]
Newton Abbey: Newt Gingrich’s ‘Dream Team’ Photo Reminiscent Of ‘Downton Abbey’ - As if Newt could ever be that cool. [HuffPost Comedy]
Ahmed Best talks about a deleted Jar Jar Binks scene that really would have redeemed his character and made a huge difference in The Phantom Menace - Han and Greedo have guns pointed at each other, but instead of one shooting they both shoot Jar Jar. Is that what he’s talking about? [FARK]
Five Things About the Phantom Menace That Didn’t Suck - Lots of Star Wars links today, I guess. Thing 6: Jake Lloyd never acted again. [Unreality]
Norwegian News Mistakes Joke T-Shirt For Actual Eye Chart - Way to go, Norwegia. Some poor guy is walking around with a nickel, trying to buy a mustache ride. [The FW]
Somebody else hates Justin Bieber, and it’s the National Academy of Recording Arts and Sciences. Beebz was shut out at last night’s Grammy Awards, but he did manage to win something else: my respect for his choice of ringtone. Bieber said on this Radio Disney program highlighted above that his ringtone for every call is the Mike Gundy “I’m a man! I’m forty!” rant, as evidenced by his call with Jaden Smith, which was totally not planned.
But really, what’s with that radio host? Ask him what’s he’s wearing? Wow, as if the lisp wasn’t enough of a tipoff…And by the way, this guy is not Tim Tebow. His name is Marcus Mumford, and he’s british. That doesn’t explain the vest, but whatever. There are only two times when it’s acceptable to wear a vest: when you’re being shot at or you’re drowning in the ocean. This gentleman appears to be doing neither, but I could surely accommodate him.