Snowflake can't even bear to look.

This is an image of the elbow laceration that Golden State Warriors forward David Lee has been playing with for the past month. Yeah, it’s pretty much just a hole, which might be great at parties if it wasn’t, you know, a gusher.

“It hurt really badly after (Tuesday’s) game,” Lee said before Wednesday’s game. “It was a blood bath when I took my elbow pad and tape off. The wound itself really isn’t improving too much, because I’m continuing to play on it. But at this point, it’s either that or sitting out. I’m not sitting out.”

–San Jose Mercury News

Lee can thank the teeth of the Knicks’ Wilson Chandler for the extra orafice (video of that on the next page) after those two entities collided on November 10th. Pretty gruesome. Oh and hey, the Heat won again last night. And there’s your NBA post for December (That’s a joke; we have at least two more NBA posts coming. Don’t email me.).

Img via @GSWscribe, via @CRM_STephen.

After George Steinbrenner passed away Tuesday, we were reminded of how he bought the Yankees for $8.8 million only to watch his empire grow to an estimated value of $1.6 billion last year. Quite a return, right? Now completely flip that around and you have Peter Guber, the new owner of the Golden State Warriors after he and Joseph Lacob paid a record $450 million for the franchise. Suddenly Donald Sterling doesn’t seem so insane.

Guber has been a minority owner of the Boston Celtics, after failing to purchase stakes in the Los Angeles Dodgers, Anaheim Ducks, and Sacramento Kings. He’s also been a Warriors season ticket holder and plans to help his new franchise back to the success that it hasn’t seen in 35 years. The Warriors last won a division title in 1976, and the Warriors’ two NBA titles came in 1956 and 1975. Presumably the expensive price is indicative of Guber’s desire to win before fans who witnessed the last title die.

Get the Bay Area’s hopes up, LA Times:

Read the rest of this entry »

This is Monta Ellis of the Golden State Warriors that decided to try one more shot before showering after his morning shootaround–a behind-the-back underhanded heave from seven rows deep into the tunnel. And we’re posting it, so of course he made it. I’m more impressed that he shot this from the side, without any support from the backboard. It’s magical, in a hey-I’m-too-short-to-dunk sort of way. –Ball Don’t Lie.

And early congratulations to Skeets and Tas, who will stream their 500th TBJ podcast tomorrow.

Through some unholy coitus of corporate synergy, several Warriors players and coaches were forced to serve as baggage handlers and flight attendants and whatnot for a Southwest Airlines flight.  Stephen Jackson, can we get some witty repartee with a cheeky passenger?

“You don’t mind me moving your bag, do you, sir?” said Jackson, shutting the NBA logo-covered overhead compartments and preparing passengers for takeoff.

“No,” a passenger replied, “just as long as you don’t mind giving me your autograph.”

BAM!  That was AWESOME!  Now how about an unbearably cheesy and canned line provided by a PR flack?

When asked about what’s in store for fans in the coming months, Jackson replied, “We’re starting off on a runway, so you know we’re taking off this season.”

HOLY SHIT THAT IS GOLD.  That must have taken months to think of.  Literally months.  Whatever Southwest and Golden State are paying their PR team, it’s clearly not enough.

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Shutdown Corner has a few minutes of gameplay footage from the upcoming Madden '09 that is set, of course, to one of the tracks from "The Power and the Glory". Seriously, the game has a large soundtrack. Spare us the heavy orchestration.

Anyway, the game looks like the tits and I'll be one of the unclean mongoloids robbing the geeks who wait in line outside the store for six hours before it comes out in August. Seriously, I hope they improve on quarterback release times. My 20-22 record on XBox Live is wreaking havoc on my self-esteem. 

The video ends with Randy Moss taking a wideout screen and, somehow with the speed of six gazelles on an ATV, blows down the field for a TD. We may have a new Video Bo on our hands. This gives the video the chance to show off the new celebration area in the endzone, where Moss breaks out Soulja Boy's something or other. We appreciate your commitment to an immersive experience, EA Sports, but Moss is contractually obligated to do retarded chicken wing celebration. Quit trying to be hip and get it right. Video games must be incredibly lifelike! The slightest alteration destroys my experience! 

/hyperventilates into paper bag 

TMZ has what they're calling exclusive photos of Randy Moss at a Kentucky Derby party grinding with Miss Kentucky USA, but guess what, I saved the image, removed the photo credit and "EXCLUSIVE" tag, and it's not really exclusive any more, is it?  I also made the photo larger and used my rudimentary photo editing skills to remove some of the glaring redeye, a relatively simple task that that you'd think someone at an Internet giant like AOL could perform.

Anyway, if this really is Miss Kentucky USA as TMZ claims, her name is Alysha Harris and she loves female orgasms — apparently she outgrew her love of unicorns and leprechauns.  I can only hope that she's half as awesome as Tara Conner, the Miss USA from Kentucky who lost her crown when she did awesome things like cocaine, drink underage, and make out with Miss Teen USA. 

In a related story, I masturbated to a Frederick's of Hollywood catalog.  Let me tell you, those girls are way freakier than the Victoria's Secret chicks is what I told myself at the time.